Learning To Let Go
by icefyre
Summary: AU fic. Kagome is moving away from home for the first time in her life. Inuyasha is a half-demon slave on the verge of giving up hope. This is their story - a story about love, sacrifice, and growing up.
1. On My Own

**Summary:** AU fic. Kagome is moving away from home for college for the first time in her life. Inuyasha is a half-demon slave on the verge of giving up hope. This is their story - a story about love, sacrifice, and growing up.

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own, Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Credits:** Okay. I'm going to try not to write a book here, but this is my first fic so I think I'm allowed a little drama. First, of course, I would like to thank the creators of Inuyasha for such a fantastic anime. I watched the first episode a few months ago, and since then I've been completely hooked. Secondly, I'd like to thank two other fanfiction writers whose work I read right here on FF.net - Imoen (author of _Slave to Love_) and Elora (author of _Ai no Koinu_). I got a lot of my ideas and all of the inspiration for this story through reading theirs. I've been reading FF.net for almost a year now and this is my first story, so inspiring me to actually write a fic I felt was worth posting here is a big deal for me. A lot of the plot came from Imoen's fic, and much of the background for the world I've set the characters in is from Elora's. I really recommend you read their stories if you haven't already - they're awesome! ^_^

And now... (drum roll) On to the fic!

**Learning to Let Go**

**Chapter 1: On my own.**

Kagome looked around her bedroom, trying to take in every detail of the room in which she had spent the first 18 years of her life. Her pale blue bedspread, the mahogany night table next to the canopy bed where she'd slept. Her dresser, her closet. The awards she'd won in academics and archery over the years.

It was all hers, and yet today, for the first time in her life, it looked strange. Almost as if she were looking at it's reflection rather than the reality. Today Kagome was moving out.

She sighed, hoisting her last bag of clothes over her shoulder. She hadn't even seen the place her parents had bought for her; she only knew that it was in the suburbs of Boston and very close to the college that she would be attending for the year. 

With a final glance back at her haven, she closed the door gently, almost reverently, and turned away. As she started down the stairs, carrying her bag, she squared her shoulders. This was the beginning of a new chapter in her life, and no matter how frightened she was she was going to make it work.

Her mother greeted her with a bright smile at the bottom of the stairs. "Are you all set darling?" she asked as Kagome stepped into the foyer. "The limousine is waiting outside, and your grandfather and Sota and I are all coming with you to help you unpack and settle in.

Kagome smiled gratefully at her mother, but suddenly paused as something occurred to her. "But mom, what about your meetings for the afternoon? Don't you have important stuff to do?"

Her mother was one of the most important members of the inner senatorial council in the government, and consequently the Higurashi family was one of the most affluent, wealthy, and influential in the world. Her mother was always traveling, and always working on essential paperwork, and always meeting with the most important figureheads all around the world, and yet somehow she always made time for her two children and her aging father.

Her mother smiled and put her hand on Kagome's shoulder. "Darling, you should know by now that no meeting is more important than making sure my baby is comfortable and happy in her new home - especially since this is the first time you'll be living so far away."

Kagome dropped her bag to the floor and flung her arms around her mother. "Mom, I'm scared," she whispered, clinging tightly to her mothers warmth and relishing in the security she offered.

Ms. Higurashi rubbed her back comfortingly. "Of course you are. But you're your mother's daughter. You're a survivor, Kagome. Soon you won't even be able to imagine living with your family anymore you'll be so happy on your own." She took Kagome by the shoulders and looked into her face. "And besides," she said brightly. "You can always come home and visit whenever you get homesick."

Reassured, and even starting to feel excited, Kagome reached down and grabbed her bag again. "You're right mom Let's go."

Arm in arm, mother and daughter walked out toward the waiting limousine.

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"Wooooow!" Sota exclaimed as they pulled up into the long, circular driveway. "You're going to be living here all by yourself, Kagome?"

Kagome looked, speechless, at the beautiful house in front of her. It was smaller than the mansion she'd lived in with her family, but just as elegant and beautiful. Forest extended behind it for as far as Kagome could see, and the grounds were well-kept. Bushes and flowers lined the slate-paved walkways and the side of the house, and the house itself was classy, made of dark red brick and with a colonial style tilt to the roof. 

"It's beautiful!" Kagome gasped finally, looking at her mother in amazement.

Ms. Higurashi smiled. "I thought you'd like it. It was just built last year, and we wanted something brick so you wouldn't have to worry about leaks, decay, or the sturdiness of the house. Come on, I'll give you the grand tour!"

The family exited the car, leaving the chauffeur to unload all the bags into the foyer of the house, and Kagome's mother and grandfather showed off the house and all the things they'd liked about it. The kitchen was furnished with all the latest technology, and there was an entertainment room with a big-screen TV and stereo system. The basement was divided into a storage section with lots of shelves and cabinets, and an exercise room. Upstairs there was a huge bedroom, a king-size bathroom with a Jacuzzi big enough for several people, and a large study that adjoined the bedroom where she could do homework and store all her books.

"Oh, mom," Kagome breathed in awe. "It's amazing. I don't know what to say."

"I helped pick it out too, you know," her grandfather grouched. "Even set you up some demon wards to keep you safe from evil spirits."

Kagome smiled and gave him a hug. "Thank you, grandpa."

"I want a house just like this when I get older," Sota was telling his mother as she helped Kagome fold her clothes and put them into the dresser and the closet. "Okay mom?"

Their mother smiled and patted his head, promising that when he turned eighteen he too would get a house near whatever school he chose to attend.

A few hours later everything was unpacked. The kitchen had been stocked with food prior to her arrival, and her car had been driven over by one of the servants. Kagome looked around her new home, brimming with enthusiasm.

"Well," her mother said gently. "Looks like it's time for us to be going."

"Yes," Kagome said, her smile slipping just slightly. "I guess it is. I'll call you tomorrow to let you know how my first day of classes goes."

"All right dear. I'll talk to you then." Kagome and her mother shared a long hug, and when they drew away from each other Kagome had to wipe the tears from her eyes surreptitiously. 

Sota hugged his sister next, looking up at her with huge eyes when she let him go. "Are you sure you don't want any of the servants to come help you out? I know you can cook and clean for yourself, but it's going to be so lonely to be by yourself in this big house."

Kagome smiled at him. She had been over this with her mother already. She wanted to try out living by herself, and if it didn't work she would ask her mother to hire a servant or two to help her out with the chores. Her family was unique in the high-class world as it was the only family who employed it's help rather than simply purchasing slaves who worked for no pay at all. Kagome had always been vaguely proud that her family looked down on what she considered to be a cruel, ignorant, and inhumane practice.

"No, Sota," she told him gently. "I'm going to try living on my own for a while. But you'll come visit me often, won't you?"

Sota smiled happily. "Of course!"

Finally she hugged her grandfather, who told her some quick rites of exorcism, and never to sleep with her shoes beside her bed, before joining Kagome's mother and little brother in the limo. Kagome watched with mixed feelings as the car pulled out of sight, leaving her alone in her new house.

She closed the door and leaned back against it, somewhat overwhelmed. She was on her own, in her own house. She could do anything she wanted any time she wanted the freedom was almost too much to bear.

Perhaps the best thing to do would be to go out and buy her schoolbooks for tomorrow. Yes, keeping her mind off things would take the edge off her anxiety. Grabbing her keys, Kagome headed out to her car.

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Well, that's it for chapter 1. This will be a pretty long fic, and I know that there hasn't been a lot of action yet, but I still have to work some more on the setting and the character development before I bring in everyone's favorite dog demon. So sit tight, cuz the next installment should be here soon, and if you get a chance let me know what you think! 


	2. It Must Be Fate

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes:** There have been some comments about Kagome being a spoiled brat, and I agree that her situation would definitely tend to spoil someone, but it's Kagome and I just can't see her that way. In some ways, however, she is very spoiled - for example she can't really relate to people who have lived less privileged lives because she's never been exposed to how they live. Also, she's been so sheltered that she doesn't have a working definition of reality outside of being rich, getting everything she wants, and being able to do whatever she wants. This comes into play later on when she meets Inuyasha, and again when she finally begins to understand just how bad things are for slaves. This really is an important part of the story because if she'd been working class or exposed to the harsher sides of life, she'd probably be too jaded to become inspired to make a difference. 

Thanks so much for your reviews; they really helped me clarify this theme in my mind, and now I'll make it stand out more because I think it's a pretty important factor in the story. 

Also, I'm going to be posting semi-quickly for the beginning of the story, especially since the chapters are short and I want to get into the plot quickly so you guys can see where I'm going with this. The downside is that I might have to slow down later since although I have a ton of ideas, getting them all to fit together in a way that makes sense and that flows with the rest of the story is starting to become a real challenge.   


**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 2: It Must be Fate.**

Kagome wandered rather aimlessly through the MIT bookshop, pulling her books off the shelves as she ran across them. She loved the campus, and she was trying to relax and enjoy the atmosphere while keeping her mind off of her family and her rather lonely house.

She was studying one of her introductory course manuals when someone behind her said, "Kagome?"

The voice was hesitant, but with an edge of buoyancy that Kagome knew could only belong to "Rin!" she cried, throwing her arms around the other girl. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm going to school here!" Rin cried, the hesitancy replaced by her usual indomitable spirit and enthusiasm. "I'm living with my older sister in Cambridge and I'm buying my books for this semester."

"Rin, that's an such an amazing coincidence because I'm going to school here too! I just got into the area this morning and I'm trying to learn my way around and get ready for classes tomorrow."

Rin squealed and hugged her again. "This is going to be great! We can visit each other much more often now that we'll be going to the same school and living in the same area. I've missed you so much Kagome - my boarding school was awful. Everyone was so distant and snobby and mean. I couldn't wait to get out of there."

They spent a few more minutes catching up with one another and helping the other find their books. As they got ready to leave the two girls exchanged addresses so they could get together later in the semester.

"Do you like living with your sister?" Kagome asked offhandedly.

To her surprise, Rin paused. "You've never met Kikyo, have you?"

Kagome shook her head.

"She can be intense," Rin temporized. "And" she hesitated again.

Kagome blinked, surprised by this display of shyness in her usually outgoing and rather wild friend. "And?" she pressed.

"And she's got a slave. Sesshoumaru. And he's"

Kagome gasped in delight, sensing a possible source of her friend's careful demeanor. "Rin! Have you got a crush on him?"

Rin blushed crazily. "Kagome! Don't say things like that! He's a slave. I can't have a crush on him. And besides, he belongs to Kikyo, and"

"And?" Kagome was really eager to hear more now.

But Rin looked distraught. "She uses him I don't know why it upsets me so much, he's just a slave, you know. But there's something about it that just feels so wrong!"

Kagome put her arms around her upset friend, not sure what to say. Most people had slaves, and Rin's family had always owned them. Rin had never seemed bothered by it before, so either Kagome was right and Rin felt something special for this particular slave, or Rin's sister Kikyo really did abuse him horribly.

"Maybe you should talk to her about it," Kagome suggested hesitantly, not sure if she should involve herself in the situation.

Rin shook her head quickly. "Oh no. You don't know Kikyo - she wouldn't listen and she might take it out on him. I couldn't bear that."

Kagome shuddered slightly - it really did sound horrible. She didn't know much about slavery at all, and had mostly tried to forget the barbaric practice even existed. 

"I'm sorry I can't help, Rin If you need to talk about it you can call me or come over. You know where I live."

Rin smiled gratefully at her friend's understanding nature and rubbed her eyes. "Thanks Kagome. You're the best."

"Good luck with your first day of classes!" Kagome called, waving as she walked toward her car.

"You too!" Rin called back, smiling her usual bright grin again.

Kagome did her best to forget about Rin's upsetting story as she drove home quickly, parking the car and bringing her books into the house. She put them on the shelves in her study, and then wandered downstairs to the kitchen. 

To her surprise, the light on the answering machine was blinking insistently at her. "Who could have called?" she wondered hitting the play button.

"Hey there Kagome!" her aunt Matilda's voice rang out cheerfully into the quiet kitchen. "Looks like you're not in right now, but give me a call as soon as you get home! I have a surprise for you."

Mystified, Kagome dialed the number her aunt had left her. Her aunt picked up on the first ring. "Hello? Aunt Matilda? It's Kagome."

"Oh, Kagome! How great to hear from you. Are you all settled in to your new home?"

"Yeah," Kagome told her happily. "I love it - it's beautiful."

"Well," her aunt said, "I realized the other day when your mother told me that you were moving out of the house that I'd never gotten you a graduation gift - or a gift to congratulate you for getting into such a great school. So I decided that it was high time I found something nice to get for you."

Kagome was touched by her thoughtfulness. "That's really great of you Aunt Matilda, but it's not necessary. You've done so much for me over the years that it more than makes up for it."

"Silly girl - don't you know you never say no to presents?" her aunt teased. "No if ands or buts. I'm going to be picking you up around three in the afternoon tomorrow and taking you out to buy you your present - will you be done with all your classes by then?"

"Yes," Kagome told her curiously. "What exactly are you taking me out to buy? Is it something I need to be there for?"

"Most definitely. This is really something you have to pick out for yourself, but the cost is on me of course."

"What is it?" Kagome asked, her curiosity getting the better of her. 

"I'm going to buy you your very own slave," her aunt told her cheerfully, and Kagome felt her stomach drop out.

She gulped. "Th-that's really thoughtful of you, but isn't there something else you could get me? I don't really - "

"Oh Kagome. Don't be stubborn. I've seen the house your mother bought for you; it's much too big and lonely to live in by yourself. You need someone to do your laundry and cook you dinner and clean up after you. You're not used to living without any servants."

Kagome was silent. Much as she hated to admit it, the big house was rather lonely. She had only been here a day and already she wished there were someone she could sit down and talk to over dinner. But still, a slave? 

"I can take care of the house without a slave," she told her aunt. "And if that were all I needed help with I could hire someone, not buy them."

"Don't be so obstinate, Kagome! You're a young woman living on her own for the first time, and slaves are the very best protectors there are. If you won't admit to being overwhelmed by housework then you can at least think of your own safety."

"I can take care of myself!" Kagome cried, mortified. "I don't need someone following me around and watching my every move like a a bodyguard!"

Kagome's aunt sighed. "I've made up my mind about this, Kagome. Your family agrees that it would be much better for you to have someone living with you than for you to be all alone in a new place."

"Did you tell them you were planning on buying me a slave?" Kagome demanded, her temper starting to flare. The nerve of this woman!

Matilda chuckled lightly. "Oh come now details are hardly necessary in these kinds of matters."

Kagome made a face.

"Anyway, dear, I understand you're opposed to the practice, but it's really not so bad. These men and women are trained from birth to serve you - they don't know how to live any other way."

"No one's given them the chance to live any other way," Kagome pointed out, but her aunt interrupted her again.

"I'm going to stop by your house at three tomorrow. If you would like to come help pick out your Pet then you are of course welcome. If not I'll just have to use my best judgment and register him in your name."

She was too busy grinding her teeth to say goodbye as her aunt wished her a good night and hung up. And she had thought she was getting away from overbearing people who liked to think they could tell her what to do, she thought sourly as she began to make herself some dinner.

She was still undecided about tomorrow. She supposed she had not choice but to go with her aunt after classes, but as for actually buying a slave - that was another story altogether. She'd just have to play it by ear.  


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Okay! Now we're starting to get somewhere with the plot. As you can see, Sesshoumaru's going to be involved, and I've actually got a pretty important part planned out for him. Just for the record, I _adore_ Sesshoumaru, and while it seems like he's got it bad for a lot of the story I promise promise promise he'll get his revenge - in all his classic, stoic, sadistic glory! And in the next chapter, Inuyasha makes his debut! 


	3. Making The Grade

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes:** To clear up some questions, yes this fic will be taking place in America. I'm not going to address the past, or the well, or any of that, though I might make cute obscure references to stuff, like Kagome telling him to sit or something little like that. There's no real reason for me making the setting in America, aside from the fact that I'm horribly uncultured and the only place I know well enough to write about with any degree of competence is the US, and more specifically the Boston area where MIT is. I don't really know why I picked MIT as the college that Kagome and Rin are attending; it was a random decision. I think she's probably majoring in computer science, but I doubt I'll be talking about that in the fic as it doesn't really have any bearing on the storyline whatsoever.

Someone also made a reference to Kagome working, but I don't think she's going to be getting a job any time soon. She's rich enough that she doesn't have to work, and her family is supporting her through college. Plus, time at work is time away from Inuyasha, and I just can't bear it when they're apart for too long! ~_^

But enough about that. Now, on to the moment you've all been waiting for. Everyone please welcome... Inuyasha!

  


**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 3: Making the Grade.**

"We're looking for male slaves, the best quality you have," Kagome's aunt told the saleswoman, standing quite calmly in the middle of the enterprise they'd come to in order to find Kagome's slave.

"Of course," The woman said, noticing the high ranking of both of the women and anticipating a large sale. "Are you interested in a human or an exotic?" she asked politely.

Matilda put her finger to her chin thoughtfully. "Yokai make much better protectors," she reasoned. "Why don't you show us the exotic collection?"

The woman nodded a pleased assent. Exotics were far more rare, especially those that could speak and reason - not to mention they fetched a much higher price. She led her two customers toward the back room where all the most high quality slaves were kept.

Kagome looked over at the lines of slaves in dismay as she walked. They were all beautiful, unusual-looking - and dead inside. She was horrified by the apathy she sensed in them, the despair and the emotionlessness with which they held themselves. They had all given up hope.

"No, no," her aunt said firmly. "Not these. They've all been owned before. Second hand slaves won't do at all. Come this way, these are the ones we'll be looking at for you."

Kagome sighed, too exhausted to argue anymore. She entered the next room with her aunt, who went to the first slave in the line and picked up his card. A quick, furtive glance around the room revealed that these slaves were indeed of higher quality - all of them Yokai of different heritages, all of them inhumanly beautiful. Even in the homes of the rich elite her mother associated with on occasion Kagome had never seen slaves of such high quality - most rich people bought slaves of grade C.

"Hmm Grade B, ranked 9 in combat. Not bad looking either." The slave her aunt was studying had long dark hair pulled back into a ponytail and held off his striking face with a headband. He was wearing a somewhat revealing outfit that resembled a mix of armor and fur. "What do you think Kagome?"

Wordlessly, Kagome shook her head and they moved to the next in line. "Grade B," her aunt read. "Ranked 10 in obedience and temperament."

Kagome shook her head again. They continued on down the line, Kagome refusing every slave her aunt recommended. Finally her aunt turned to her in exasperation. "Kagome, if you're going to be difficult I'll just pick one for you myself. You need a slave if you expect to get by living by yourself. Don't make this any more difficult than it has to be."

Kagome winced, realizing that her aunt was serious, and like it or not, she was going home with a slave. Looking up her eyes trailed over the line of desolate men. Panic started to rise in her. She didn't want one, she really didn't -

A flash of something white caught her eyes and she glanced toward it before drawing a sharp breath. Her aunt followed her line of sight and her eyebrows went up. "Well, would you look at him," she said in a low voice. She moved to pick up the card at his feet, but Kagome didn't follow. She was too busy staring at the boy on the pedestal. 

He was taller than average, and stunningly gorgeous. He looked about her age. The red clothing he wore offset the startling color of his hair and the deep, unique gold of his eyes. Pure white and silky looking, his long hair fell down his back unbound, and those striking eyes were large - and fierce. They held what all the other slaves had been lacking - a spark of personality underlying all the breeding and conditioning and training. And he had a terrific body. Kagome felt herself flushing. As if he'd read her mind, the boy turned his head just slightly and met her eyes steadily in what was almost a glare, as if challenging her to keep staring.

Flushing more, she dropped her eyes. 

"Kagome," her aunt called, motioning her closer. "I have to congratulate you - you've got quite an eye for this it seems. He's a Grade A slave - best you can get. Just out of training, *and* he's a rank 10 protector. Ranked 10 in just about everything in fact - combat, strength, endurance, sexual ability - "

"WHAT?!" Kagome shrieked, taking a step back in shock and mortification.

Her aunt gave her a patient look. "All the best looking slaves are trained to please their masters sexually - but it takes quite a bit of talent to get a rank 10. As I said, quite a find, I think you'll be very happy with him - "

Kagome took another step back, starting to get angry. "No way!" she cried. "I don't know how I let you talk me into coming here, but - "

The saleswoman come over just then, drawn by Kagome's raised voice. She smiled in a calming way and put a soothing hand on Kagome's shoulder. "An excellent choice," she murmured, looking up at the white haired boy appraisingly. "This slave is the best we have. He was trained at the most prestigious school in the country, and graduated at the top of his class in every area. He's unique as well - the only half-Yokai we've ever heard of."

Kagome blinked, startled out of being obstinate by the mention of his ethnicity. She looked back up at him, and caught sight of small, furry white ears, half-hidden by his hair.

"Half-Yokai?" her aunt was asking. "How can he measure up to a full Yokai in a battle, then?"

"Oh, not to worry," the woman assured them. "He's been up against the very best and come out the victor. He's stubborn to a fault, which makes it impossible for him to lose."

"Stubborn," her aunt murmured, tapping her chin and looking up at the boy. "Is that why his marks in temperament are lower than usual?"

The saleswoman winced. "Yes, he does seem to have somewhat of a temper," she admitted, but added quickly, "He's very obedient however, as you'll see from his stats. His temperament has never interfered with his duty."

"Well, he seems more than satisfactory. What do you say, Kagome?"

Kagome hesitated. If she had to have a slave.

"If you don't take him, I will," her aunt threatened, and Kagome glared. But some part of her was horrified by the idea, especially with all this talk of sex. She made up her mind.

"Fine!" She crossed her arms over her chest and turned away, pouting as the transaction was completed. Her mind was in complete turmoil. How could this have gotten so out of control? Emotions churned within her. Disgust with herself for allowing herself to become one of the masses who owned slaves and supported the industry. Anger at her aunt for putting her in this position. Uncertainty and anxiety concerning this boy who she had just bought.

"Sign here," the saleswoman instructed, handing her a clipboard and a pen. Her aunt had already filled out all the paperwork for her, and she had even gone through the payment process. All that was left was Kagome's approval. Too late for me to back out now, she thought. 

Numbly, Kagome penned her signature into the blank and handed it back, and the woman held out a leash to her.

Kagome stared at it uncomprehendingly.

"Take it," the woman urged. "He belongs to you now."

Slowly, disbelievingly, Kagome's eyes followed the leash to where it connected to a metal collar that had been snapped around the boy's neck after he'd been unshackled and brought down off the pedestal. Everything in her protested treating another person this way. Gingerly, as if it would bite her, she took the leash and held it at arms length.

"That's it!" The saleswoman said, beaming at her. "You are his sole master. He'll answer to you and only to you, protect you unconditionally, and serve you without question. And if you don't mind my saying so, I know what *I'd* do with him. Enjoy!" And with a suggestive wink, the woman wandered off to serve the other customers.

Kagome stood, still unsure of how she had let this happen. What on earth was she going to do with this boy?  


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I think half the reason I enjoy writing this story so much is the image of Inuyasha as my slave... more specifically my sex slave... But I swear, I'm not going to let my dirty mind take over this fic - until later in the story that is! *evil grin* 

Yes... the rating will be changing to R somewhere in the future. I'll probably do it sooner than later, since the sexual tension and the references to sex are something I'm not really sure should fall under a PG-13 rating, though I don't really have much experience with deciding that kind of thing. There's also going to be some pretty impressive swearing by Inuyasha (who else?) and I thought I remembered reading somewhere that any movie with the "F-word" had to be rated R, which is consequently the policy I'll follow here.


	4. I Live To Serve

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **For those of you worried about fluff, I'll put your minds at ease right now and reassure you that there will be *plenty* of Kag/Inu fluff, and probably some Sess/Rin fluff as well! I might even throw some Sango/Miroku in there if I can find a way to work those two into the plot without making it too complex and crowded. If I get to chapter 10 and you still think the story is lacking in fluff just let me know and I'll be sure to make that a top priority for future chapters. Really though, I think there'll be enough to go around.

This is Inuyasha's real introduction, as this is the first time he actually talks and we start to get a sense of his personality. I'm still trying to perfect his character, so pleeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaase tell me if you like my version of Inuyasha or not! Feedback really helps shape my story because I know what gets a good response from my readers! Thanks&Enjoy!

**  
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**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 4: I Live to Serve.**

Her aunt dropped them off in front of her house and drove off with a cheeky wave, wishing Kagome luck with school. The drive home had been painful, with her aunt making small talk while Kagome tried to forget that there was a gorgeous half-Yokai boy who belonged to her sitting in the back seat.

She stared stupidly after the car for a long moment until the boy beside her shifted slightly. Kagome jumped, dropping the leash as though it had burned her and taking a step back. Her eyes met his, and for a moment Kagome was lost in their liquid gold depths. He didn't move, or speak, or even blink as he met her gaze in the same way he had earlier - with that hint of barely repressed challenge.

Kagome could tell without a doubt that her aunt was wrong - that even if this boy had been raised from birth to be a slave, even if he and been taught that he was worthless and could only live the life his master set before him, he didn't believe it. Here was someone who had not been broken, one of the few survivors of a grueling mental war that killed the spirit of it's victims.

"Do - Do you have a name?" she asked hesitantly, not really sure what the proper etiquette was with slaves when starting a conversation.

The boy gave her an incredulous glance, but answered promptly, "Inuyasha." His voice was nice, a warm baritone that sent an unexpected thrill through her. It was the first time she'd heard him speak.

She fidgeted for another moment, and he waited in silence, but something about his stance made her suspect that he was impatient. "Do you want to go inside?" she asked finally, not sure how to converse with someone who seemed unwilling to reciprocate.

She'd really startled him this time. "What do you mean do *I* want to?" he asked, looking almost annoyed. "You give an order and I follow it. That's how it works."

Kagome's eyes widened. "That's what you want me to do?"

Inuyasha stared at her hard for a moment, eyes narrowed. Slowly, he crossed his arms over his chest. "Keh!" he said finally, contemptuously. "You're not at all like what they said to expect. You don't know what to do with me, do you?"

Kagome bit her lip. "No," she admitted. "I just moved away from home. I've never lived by myself before and my family - well, my aunt, really - wanted me to have someone to protect me and take care of the house. She glanced over at the home they'd bought for her. "It really is too big for just one person."

He glanced at it as well. For a moment it looked like he was about to comment on it, but he seemed to hold himself back.

Determined to make the best of this situation, Kagome smiled brightly and held out her hand to him in a friendly gesture. "I'm Kagome, by the way. I forgot I hadn't really introduced myself. You're going to be living here - Oh! I completely forgot. Is there anything you need? Clothes or books or anything? I didn't even think about that kind of stuff." She looked at him hopefully.

Her new housemate was glaring down at her hand as if she were offering him a dead cat instead of a friendly handshake. "What's your problem, wench? Don't you know anything about the way things work? I'm a slave," he repeated, as if she might have forgotten. "You don't buy things for me or shake hands with me or introduce yourself. Do you expect me to call you by your name or something?"

"What else would you call me?" She asked, taken aback by his anger.

"'Master', obviously," he informed her, still with that derisive edge to his voice.

Kagome found it hard to keep her temper reigned in and dropped her hand, returning his glare. "I'd like it if you called me by my name, but if that's too difficult for you I certainly prefer 'Master' to 'Wench"!" she snapped.

"What the hell do you mean if it's too difficult for me?" he demanded. "I'm doing everything right. You're the one who's not going by the book. What's your problem?"

"What's my problem?" she echoed, incredulous. Kagome was getting madder by the minute. She hated being wrong, and it seemed that she had completely misjudged the boy in front of her. His challenging glare hadn't been due to his dislike of slavery, he'd simply taken an immediate disliking to her. She'd thought he was different, someone who could relate to her disgust with the whole enterprise, but it seemed her aunt had been right after all - slaves really did want to be treated as slaves.

Angry and disappointed, she took a step back, pointing at him accusingly. "You're the one with the problem," she shouted at him. "My aunt told me that slaves were brought up to be slaves, that they didn't know how to do anything else. I didn't believe her, but I guess she was right!" That strange feeling of being let down was throbbing in her chest, stronger than ever. She turned and took a few steps away from him toward her car, but paused and turned back. "I thought you were different. I thought you were going to prove her wrong."

Getting into her car, Kagome slammed the door as hard as she could as tears came to her eyes. She hadn't even realized she felt so strongly about this issue until she'd seen that beautiful, proud, powerful Hanyou demanding that she stop treating him like a person and start acting the way he'd been told a master should act.

Angrily, she twisted the key in the starter, feeling the engine purr to life. She'd take a long drive, and maybe some time alone would help her sort things out in her head.

@@@

Inuyasha stared after the car until the taillights disappeared around the corner. Then he glanced around suspiciously. For the first time in his entire life, he was alone. No guards, no surveillance, no other slaves.

It was a strange feeling, and not one he was entirely comfortable with. He didn't consider himself to be a social person, but being by himself, watching the taillights disappear, was reminding him strangely of the way his parents - 

No! He wouldn't think about that. Unconsciously his hand went to the sword at his hip, the only legacy his family had left him. He sniffed the air delicately, his ears twitching. This was a much nicer place than the cities he was accustomed to, in his opinion. He'd never seen so many trees in one place before. And the house - it was still a bit overwhelming to think that he was going to be living there.

Nothing was the way he'd thought it would be. He'd been told that his master would be cold, uncaring, cruel. He'd been warned about the atrocities that slaves endured - murder and beatings and rape, though when those terms were used to describe behavior toward slaves, they were said differently - termination, discipline, and of course, it wasn't really possible to rape a slave, any more than it was possible to rape an inanimate object.

But it seemed that none of these things were in store for him. Instead, he had a master who was younger than he was, and damnably naïve about the way the world worked. Her innocence twisted something deep in his gut, a strange feeling that he had never experienced before.

For the first time in his life, Inuyasha found himself wanting to let himself hope. Unless you screwed it all up by being an asshole, he thought bitterly. He still couldn't believe he'd been so forward and so disrespectful. It had gone against everything he'd been taught, but it had felt so good, and he'd been wanting to speak his mind for so long.

Picked a great time to start, his mind berated. Scare off the first person to treat you as anything other than the scum of the earth. She's probably not going to come back. She's probably going to send you away, or give you to someone else who'll be everything you told her you wanted.

Cold fear gripped his heart. He hadn't realized that he cared so much already, that he'd let down his guard to the point where the thought of losing the sudden fortune that had presented itself to him hurt. Here he might never have to worry about being starved or beaten or killed. 

What do I care? he told himself angrily. I can take anything they throw at me. No one can break me. He clenched his fists in the thin material of his shirt as the wind picked up. The sun was setting and the air was getting to the freezing point. He briefly considered going into the house, but she hadn't told him he could, and some small part of him was afraid of upsetting her further.

I won't apologize, he told himself firmly. When she comes back If she comes back he found himself gazing anxiously down the driveway, straining his excellent hearing and sense of sight for any sign of the girl. She'll come back. She has to come back.

@@@

When Kagome pulled back into the driveway a few hours later, she was stunned to see Inuyasha standing exactly where she'd left him, arms crossed over his chest, looking sullen - and cold. She got out of the car, frowning in confusion. Why on earth would he still be standing there?

Still confused and somewhat hurt because of their earlier encounter, she didn't exactly relish in another confrontation with him at the moment. But it looked as if he wasn't going to back down.

Getting out of the car, she paused in front of him uncertainly, waiting for him to speak. When he didn't, she became even more confused. "What are you doing?" she asked him finally.

"Waiting for you," was the prompt answer, spoken with a sullenness that matched his expression.

Completely nonplussed, she blinked at him in consternation. "Why?"

"What else would I be doing?" he challenged.

"I thought - why aren't you waiting inside?" None of this made any sense to her.

"You didn't tell me I could go inside," he informed her with exaggerated patience.

Kagome stared at him for a moment. "You've been standing here all this time?"

He didn't answer, just glared in another direction. She was suddenly overwhelmed with guilt. "I'm sorry!" she cried. "You must be half frozen! I didn't even think - I didn't know - " she turned toward the house, motioning for him to follow her.

He was staring at her now, all his anger and sullenness having evaporated. "You mean - you aren't going to get rid of me?"

She paused, bewildered. "Get rid of you? Why would I do that?"

He started to speak, then shook his head. She was still waiting for him to follow her into the house, but he was still hesitating. 

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"The leash," he muttered, so quietly she almost couldn't hear him. Baka, she thought to herself, frowning. She'd forgotten about it. Was he not allowed to move unless she was holding it? That was unacceptable. 

Determinedly, she moved to stand in front of him, carefully brushing his silky hair out of the way. 

"Wh-what are you doing?" he asked as her fingers found the clasp of his collar.

"Taking this thing off you," she told him, tugging it off of his neck and tossing it to the side with barely disguised revulsion. Her skin pricked with sudden awareness at his close vicinity, and she looked up.

Oh. She'd forgotten how magnetic his eyes could be. And he was looking at her now without the bitterness and anger and resentfulness that had colored his personality earlier.

"Why did you do that?" he murmured, and his voice was softer, tinged with amazement. She realized she'd somehow gotten thought his defenses.

"Because it's horrible," Kagome said, quietly but fiercely. "You shouldn't need permission for something as simple as moving and you shouldn't need permission to go into the house when it's freezing cold outside - especially since you live here now!" 

The open amazement in his gaze was suddenly guarded, his beautiful eyes shuttered again. He straightened, glancing away. "You're crazy."

Kagome frowned, about to argue, but abruptly decided it wasn't worth it. He'd been almost civil, and while he'd called her crazy he hadn't yelled at her about how she was doing everything all wrong. That had to be progress, didn't it?

With a sigh, she turned toward the house again, this time aware of him following her. She unlocked the door and let him into the foyer, glancing at him surreptitiously. He was looking around, obviously trying to take everything in while attempting to look completely disinterested. She wondered briefly what to do about sleeping arrangements, since there was only one bedroom.

Well, first things first. She'd better warm him up and feed him.  


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Make sure to tell me if I'm getting OOC in my representation of any of the characters. I think I'm making Kikyo seem too evil, but it's necessary at this point in the story. I'm not really sure where I'm going with her character at the moment, but she doesn't come in for a little while yet anyway. Inuyasha is the character I'm really concerned about, so if you could let me know how I'm doing with that I'd really appreciate it! Thanks! 

Next chapter: Inuyasha gets fed - and we all know that the way to a hanyou's heart is through his stomach! ~_^


	5. Chicken Soup For the Hanyou Soul

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **Good news everyone! I've decided that Miroku will definately be making an appearance in this fic - probably four or five in fact! He won't have a big part, or at least I don't think he will, but he'll definitely be one of the comic relief characters. Consequently, I've decided that Sango has to come in somewhere, although I'm having a little more trouble figuring out how to incorporate her without being *too* cliche. I still have lots of time to deal with all that though - just thought you guys might be interested.

Okay, so to address some of the stuff brought up in reviews: Kagome/Rin/Miroku/the other non-slave characters aren't in the clothing from the anime - they're just normal college students. As for the slaves, I actually did picture them in their typical outfits, but I know that's not entirely realistic so I'm leaving the interpretation of their appearance up to you guys. The thing to remember is that they're slaves, and they're supposed to stand out so that people can distinguish them and treat them accordingly. 

As for the protection aspect of Kagome and Inyasha's current relationship, she is his responsibility - he *has* to protect her. If anything happens to her it will reflect badly on him, and he'll be punished and forced to do something a lot more horrible than serving as a personal slave. In the "slave heirarchy", being a personal slave is definitely the top rung of the ladder. Below it are things like working in a factory or a mine, doing things like construction and constant difficult manual labor, and the worst fate of all - being reprogrammed (which you'll hear about from Inuyasha later on.) Inuyasha is lucky because he's talented, attractive, and consequently he's worth a lot of money - so he was naturally trained and sold as a personal slave.

I'm glad you like how Inuyasha is coming out! I'm getting more and more confident about writing him as I go along. Kagome came really naturally to me for some reason, and I think Miroku will be pretty easy too. The characters I have the most trouble with are Rin (!!) and Sango. If you have any suggestions on how I can translate Rin's child-personality to her young-adult-in-love-with-Sesshoumaru-personality, that would be great. Sesshoumaru and Kikyo are going to be difficult to write - I'm tempted to make Kikyo very emotional in a spiteful, seductive, violent way, but I think she's actually more cold than anything else so I'll try to write her as such. Sesshoumaru is hard because I love him so much that I don't want to screw up his personality - if Thunk is reading this maybe she could give me some hints because I LOVE the way Sesshoumaru comes across in her fics - he's absolutely PERFECT! 

**  
**

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 5: Chicken Soup for the Hanyou Soul.**

"Are you still cold?" Kagome asked him, breaking the silence that had fallen over them since entering the house.

Inuyasha stopped looking around the interior of the house quickly before she could accuse him of being overawed by it's splendor. _I was standing out in the cold for six hours, what the hell do you think?_ he thought, but all he said was "I'll live."

Kagome glared and turned away. "You don't have to act all tough," she muttered under her breath, heading for the stairs.

"I heard that," Inuyasha snapped from behind her, and she turned and stared at him, apparently startled by his perception.

"Oh right, the ears," Kagome remembered. Inuyasha waited for her to ridicule him, to call him a freak and a bastard and a mutant abomination, but she just studied his ears absently for a moment before starting up the wide, carpeted staircase. She paused again halfway up and turned toward him almost sheepishly. "Uh, you don't have to wait there if you don't want to. You can look around, or go sit down or watch TV or whatever. I'll be back in a minute."

Inuyasha stood there stonily until she was out of sight, then turned and moved hesitantly toward the nearest doorway. The whole house was clean and stylish and beautiful. The furniture was all expensive and top-quality. And her scent was everywhere, though more faintly than he would have expected, probably due to the fact that she'd just moved in.

"Inuyasha?"

Her voice was soft and tentative, and he moved toward the sound silently. She was standing in one of the brightly lit rooms, and she jumped violently as he stepped out of the shadows, spinning to face him and dropping everything she'd had in her arms in the process.

"You scared me to death!" she gasped, staring at him wide-eyed. "Why didn't you turn the lights on?"

He shrugged, not particularly sorry for frightening her. "Don't need them."

"Oh." She took a deep, calming breath and then looked down at the pile of stuff she'd dropped. "I brought you some stuff," she told him, brightening again inexplicably. "I wasn't expecting to share the house with anyone so I don't have any extra beds - you'll have to sleep on the couch. But I have lots of extra blankets and pillows, so you should be okay until we can work something else out for you. And I don't really have any clothes that are big enough for you either, so I can't give you anything warmer until tomorrow when I can go buy you some stuff."

Inuyasha stared down at the blankets and pillows heaped on the floor. Sleeping on a couch was supposed to be less than ideal? He was used to cold floors and only thin sheets for warmth. And she wanted to buy him clothes, was acting as though he deserved them or something. How can she be so rich and not understand how slaves are supposed to be treated? He wondered.

"Are you hungry?" Kagome asked him, sounding almost hopeful.

Was she kidding? He was always hungry. Slowly he looked up at her, thinking it was some kind of joke meant to torment him. But she looked serious.

"What kind of food?" he asked suspiciously, and was completely thrown when she smiled brilliantly at him.

"All kinds of food!" she told him enthusiastically. "My mom and my grandfather made sure I had lots of everything." She led him into the kitchen, listing off kinds of food he'd never even heard of on her fingers. He kept quiet, afraid of giving away the fact that he was completely overwhelmed. She was opening cupboards now, all filled with boxes of different kinds of food.

"Oatmeal, macaroni and cheese, canned vegetables - yuck! - popcorn, chicken broth, Ramen, pizza - "

"Did you say Ramen?" Inuyasha demanded, unable to help himself. He'd tried it once, while the proctor wasn't looking, and had been thoroughly punished for his disobedience and presumptuousness. But he'd never forgotten the amazing taste, so different from the lumpy gruel that slaves were fed.

"Sure!" Kagome told him, taking down a red and gold box. "Is that what you want?"

Inuyasha was suspicious again. "You're going to feed me Ramen?"

Confused by his manner, Kagome paused with the box half open. "If you want me to," she said slowly. "You could have something else too."

"Ramen is fine," he said gruffly, turning his face away and trying to ignore the enticing smell as Kagome made the soup. 

A few moments later she put a steaming bowl in front of him and one in front of herself. "All done," she told him, handing him a spoon and sitting down across from him. Inuyasha stared at the bowl in disbelief, then looked up at her. 

"All of this?" He asked incredulously. "I can eat all of this?"

Kagome blinked. "Well I figured you were hungry after standing outside for so long, so I made you two packages. You don't have to finish it if it's too much - "

She broke off as Inuyasha grabbed the bowl and started to eat as if he'd been half-starved his entire life which, in fact, he had been. It only took him minutes to polish off the whole bowl, and he looked up to see Kagome staring at him in amazement. 

He winced internally and froze guiltily, thinking she'd changed her mind and was angry, or maybe offended by his manners, but after a minute she shook herself and pushed her own bowl toward him. "Here I think you're hungrier than I am."

His eyes widened fractionally. Was this girl for real? Any moment now he was going to wake up back in the institute, dressed in rags and curled into a ball on the floor, still in pain from his last disciplinary session. He wanted to pinch himself just to make sure it wasn't a dream, but settled instead for going to work on her bowl as well.

When he'd polished that off Inuyasha was more satisfied than he'd ever been in his life. It was an almost heady delight not to feel the gnawing pain of hunger in his gut anymore, and he would have purred in content if Kagome hadn't been sitting right across from him, still watching in bemusement.

"Do you want some more?" she asked, standing and taking the bowls from the table to the sink. He shook his head, leaning back in his chair and still enjoying the feeling. She tilted her head. "Do you want to sleep now? Or watch a movie, or listen to music or something? I think I'm going to go upstairs and study for a while, since it's only my first day of classes and I'm already behind on my work." She sighed. "Oh well, nothing I can do about it now, I guess. Come on, I'll help you make your bed."

"I thought you said I didn't have a bed," Inuyasha said, following her into the living room where she picked up the bundle of blankets and pillows and carried them into the next room, the one with the huge TV and the biggest couch.

"I meant the couch you're going to be sleeping on," Kagome explained, tossing the pillows at one end of the couch and spreading the blankets out over the cushions. She brushed off her hands and surveyed her work before nodding her head in satisfaction. "Well, that should be okay for tonight anyway. If you need anything I'll be right upstairs, and here's the remote for the TV." She tossed it on top of the pillows and turned to go, but he was standing directly behind her and blocking her path.

"Why?" he demanded, arms crossed over his chest, eyes narrowed.

Kagome blinked. "Why what?" she asked, seemingly lost.

He glared at her. "Why are you being so goddamn nice to me? I'm a slave, a lesser being. Not to mention being a half-demon freak of nature. I haven't done anything to give you a reason to be nice."

"Do I need a reason to be nice?" she asked, and he was startled to see that he'd managed to irritate her again. "I'm only doing what any decent person would do, you know. And why do you say all those horrible things about yourself? You're not a lesser being, and you're not a freak, so stop saying it!"

He studied her, not moving to let her by. She glared back, refusing to be intimidated by him this time. Finally he uncrossed his arms and looked away. "Keh. You really are crazy if you think that anyone else would be treating me this way. And I am a freak."

She sighed wearily and stepped around him. "I'm tired of arguing with you. I have stuff I need to get done."

"You really mean it." His words stopped her in her tracks, and she slowly pivoted to look back at him.

He was standing half turned away from her, his hair falling over his eyes and hiding his expression and his thoughts from her. 

"Of course I mean it," she said quietly. "I've been trying to get that through your thick head all day."

He turned away and moved to sit on the couch. "Go do your work."

She hesitated for a moment, but when he didn't look at her she turned and left. He listened to her footsteps all the way up the stairs and down the hall. Finally relaxing, he looked around him in wonder before picking up the remote cautiously. It was going to be an interesting night.  


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Sorry if you're dissapointed about the sleeping arrangements, but fear not - I'll keep this interesting, I promise. As you can see, I've changed the rating in anticipation of later stuff... I think it would probably be okay to leave it as PG-13, but I think I'd rather err on the side of caution. Thanks again for your feedback on Inuyasha - and like I said at the beginning of the chapter, any suggestions for Rin would be lovely.


	6. The Wrong Side Of The Bed

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **After a lot of thought, I've decided to leave the rating of this story at PG-13. There's not going to be anything explicit in it, as I find explicit sex somewhat unclassy, and the tone of this story is more light and fuzzy, though the themes are very serious and I'm trying not to downplay how horrible and disgusting slavery is. If, however, anyone who reads this story feels offended by something I've written and thinks that I should up the rating, just drop me an email or review and I'll change it right away.

**Character update:** I'm really happy with the way Miroku and Sesshoumaru are coming out as of this moment, and I'm also starting to feel better about Kikyo. Rin is still iffy, but I'm working on getting comfortable with writing her.**  
**

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 6: The Wrong Side of the Bed.**

Kagome groaned, lifting her head off the pillow to squint at her alarm clock. With a mumbled curse, she rolled out of bed and staggered into the shower. As the warm water ran over her, she thought over the events of yesterday in her mind, more than a little confused.

What on earth was she doing with a slave staying in her house? Granted, he wasn't anything like the slaves she was used to, and he actually seemed like he might be pretty good company if he'd only stop snapping at her and open up a little.

She sighed and turned off the hot water, stepping out and wrapping a fluffy towel around herself. She didn't have time to think about it now; she had classes and then she was going to buy him some new clothes so he didn't have to wear that gaudy bright red all the time.

Although, come to think of it, he did look good in it. Then again, she couldn't really think of anything he wouldn't look good in. She made a face at herself in the mirror and ran a brush through her wet hair before grabbing her book bag and heading for the kitchen to grab a breakfast bar before heading off to class.

En route to the kitchen she passed through the entertainment room just to see how Inuyasha was doing - and froze. 

Oh was all she could think as she took in the sight before her. He'd taken off his shirt to sleep, and the blankets were tangled around his waist. Her eyes followed the lines of his body to where they disappeared beneath the blanket at his navel, taking in the perfectly defined muscles in his sculpted physique. His frost colored hair was flung across the pillow, and his face He looked so much younger asleep - softer, more innocent. It took all of her willpower to look away from him, a heavy blush suffusing her as she hurried by him to the kitchen.

Oh god. What would her mother think if she found out that Kagome was living with a gorgeous boy? What would her grandfather think?

You'd be in deep trouble, Kagome, that's what. She sighed. Why did things like this always seem to happen to her? Though she had to say that this was by far the most interesting and complicated mess she'd managed to get herself into. 

Sighing, she reached for a breakfast bar only to drop it when Inuyasha spoke up behind her. "What are you doing?"

She spun to face him, her flush from earlier returning when she realized he hadn't bothered to put his shirt on before coming out to investigate. "Stop doing that!" She shouted at him, glaring.

He blinked, then shrugged. "It's not my fault you're too easy to scare," he pointed out.

Kagome shook her head in exasperation. "I'm just getting a quick breakfast. I have to get to school or I'll be late for my classes."

"Classes? What am I supposed to do while you're doing that?"

Kagome shrugged, not having thought about it. "Whatever you want, I guess. There's Ramen and anything else you want to eat around. And TV, and a gym downstairs. I have some books upstairs if you want to - " she broke off quickly as he stretched, going wide-eyed at the unexpectedly appealing sight of the rippling muscle in his upper body. "I uh - have to go," she said quickly, face bright pink as she turned and fled.

Facing the most attractive boy she'd ever met while he was half-naked was not something she was feeling up to this early in the morning.

@@@

Inuyasha blinked at her hasty exit, then felt his eyebrows go up as he realized the problem. He smirked slowly. So that's what had made her so skittish all of a sudden, he mused, leaning casually against the doorframe as his sensitive ears picked up her car starting in the driveway. 

It was interesting to say the least. Pleasing a master sexually was one of the skills his prefects had trained him in most strenuously - probably only second to his combat skills. Inuyasha had gotten used to the intrusiveness of his training. Modesty was something they had quickly eliminated from his psyche - it was impossible to maintain it considering some of the techniques they employed. He supposed that's why he thought nothing of walking around shirtless - though Kagome would obviously beg to differ.

He'd always assumed sex would be one of the more unbearable parts of being a slave, but for some reason the thought of giving Kagome pleasure wasn't repugnant in the least. In fact he was finding it rather arousing. All his life he'd thought he was unlucky for being so attractive, but thinking back to Kagome's reaction to him, he decided he just might change his mind on that account. The thought of her fingers tangled in his hair, her voice moaning, gasping for breath, whispering his name - 

Inuyasha came back to himself with a sharp jerk. What the hell was wrong with him? Kagome would never order him to do anything of the sort. In fact, If he read her correctly she'd never even been kissed by a boy before and he was an idiot if he thought that a beautiful, intelligent girl would give *him* the honor of being her first.

Scowling, Inuyasha stalked into the kitchen, determined to take his mind off these ridiculous thoughts for good and focus on the hundreds of interesting smells that were surrounding him. Somehow he'd been lucky enough to end up in a slavery where he had more freedom than ever before in his life, and he was going to take advantage of it.

@@@

Kagome walked through the mall with Rin, feeling calmer after her classes and after unloading her problems onto her friend. Rin had been shocked to hear about Kagome's situation with Inuyasha, but she seemed quite amused with the scenes between the two of them that the other girl had imparted. 

They were currently in the process of finding Inuyasha some new clothes, and Rin was trying to comfort Kagome and get her to see the bright side of her situation.

"Don't be so negative, Kagome," the older girl told her seriously, ever the optimist. "I know you think that slavery is wrong, but from what you've said you haven't been treating him like a slave at all. It doesn't have to be a bad thing for him - in fact, I bet this is the luckiest break he's ever gotten!"

Kagome shook her head. "That's not the point! The point is he should never have been put in a position where being treated like a person seemed like a lucky break to him. It's horrible! I can't even begin to imagine what it must have been like for him."

Rin shook her head in amazement at her younger friend's empathy. "You've always been kind of strange, Kagome, but now you really sound like a revolutionary. It seems like you want to see all the slaves freed or something like that."

Kagome paused. "All the slaves freed" she murmured wistfully. "I wish I could do something like that but there's no way it's possible."

Rin bit her lip. "I don't know about all the slaves, but I sure wish I could free Sesshoumaru. It's really unbearable to have to live with Kikyo when she treats him so badly."

Kagome looked at her in disbelief. "Is it really that bad?"

"Yes!" Rin cried passionately. "She hurts him, Kagome, all the time. And she makes him do stuff."

"What kind of stuff?" 

"Sexual stuff," Rin whispered, sounding ashamed. "Twisted stuff, stuff that hurts him. It's awful and disgusting and wrong."

Kagome stopped walking, horrified and shocked to her very core. She hadn't really believed that things like that happened - not in her world where everything was civilized and humane and wonderful. Things like that had always been distant and hazy and untouchable - nothing that she could relate to.

But now, she couldn't help but think of Inuyasha as Kikyo's slave, being used and hurt and abused mentally and sexually. Being worn down over time until finally he lost the spark that made him so unique and became like all the other slaves she'd seen - broken and without hope. The image hurt. And it made her furious.

She didn't realize that her fists were clenched and she was trembling with fury until Rin touched her arm in concern. "Kagome? Are you all right?"

Kagome forced her jaw to unlock, pasted an unconvincing smile on her face. "I'm fine. Let's just buy these clothes and get out of here I'm starting to feel claustrophobic."

"All right," Rin agreed. "Lets talk about something else. Hey, have you noticed that Naraku guy in our math class?"

Kagome wracked her brain. "Naraku, Naraku nope, doesn't ring a bell."

Rin rolled her eyes. "You're so oblivious. He was totally checking you out today."

Kagome flushed. "I'm sure you're just reading too much into it," she muttered as she paid for the clothes and picked up her shopping bags.

"No, really!" Rin insisted, following her out of the store and toward her car. "I'm serious, Kagome. Pay more attention next time."

Kagome shook her head as she put the bags in her trunk and climbed into the drivers seat. "I'll take your word for it, I guess. Anyway, good luck with the math problem set tonight, and I'll see you tomorrow in class," she said, pulling out of her spot and heading home.

It had been a long day with no redeeming qualities, and Kagome couldn't help but feel that this was only the beginning of her problems.  


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Sooo... sexy Inuyasha and poor Sesshoumaru! Kagome's getting ideas... and getting pissed. And we all know how...persuasive she can be when she's angry about something. Hopefully you can see now why she had to be so rich and naive about everything - otherwise she wouldn't care about this stuff, and it wouldn't shock her or make her angry.


	7. Rags To Riches

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

~*~ Sorry for the delay today - I was out all night and most of today, so I just got home a few minutes ago.

**Notes: **This is definitely the most inspired I've ever been while writing a fic. I can barely stop writing it, and when I do stop and go do something else little bits and pieces of it will pop into my head and I'll have to jump up and scribble them down so I don't forget. I've got almost all of the plot planned out, and luckily the gray areas are in the middle and not at the end, because the *worst* place to have writer's block is at the very end of a fic! I'm setting a tentative length of ~30 chapters for this story, but that's not set in stone at all - I think that's probably the shortest it'll be, but I reserve the right to make it much longer.

There have been complaints about the lack of fluff and all I can say is that I'm sorry! I know not much has happened between them yet but I'm a big fan of natural development of a relationship between two characters - so it's really out of my control! When they're ready they'll start making moves on each other all by themselves... I swear, that's really how it happens. Luckily they hit it off right away, and I can tell that pretty soon they'll be looking for excuses to take the relationship to the next level. And if they don't get on with it soon enough for you... blame Kagome and Inuyasha, not me! I'm as anxious to get to the hot steamy sex as you are, but every time I try to bring it up Kagome smacks me and Inuyasha pulls out his sword - even Miroku is shaking his head at me and calling me hopeless! *sigh* 

**Character update:** As far as I can tell, Hojo will *not* be making an appearance in this fic. I kinda wanted to have him around, but I can't think of any real purpose for him, and I think it would just make things more complicated and the character balance more complex. I don't want to neglect the really important characters while focusing too much on the peripheral ones! 

Thanks SO much for everyone who gave me suggestions on Rin's character. Thanks to you guys I feel a lot more focused on the important parts of her personality, and I think I can do a better job of writing her from now on. To the reviewer who asked about Miroku - we've still got a little ways to go before his introduction, but don't worry, he's on the way. And I really like how he came out. And for those of you who don't think Kikyo is evil enough - wait till the next chapter -_-;**  
**

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 7: Rags to Riches.**

Kagome walked into the quiet house, putting her book bag down at the foot of the stairs. Carrying the rest of the bags that contained the clothes she'd bought for Inuyasha, she wandered in the direction of the kitchen. When she reached it, however, it was empty, and the dirty dishes from last night were no longer in the sink. Did he clean up? Kagome wondered curiously.

She checked the entertainment room next, thinking he might be watching TV, but that room was empty too - and the blankets and pillows he'd used last night were neatly folded and stacked at one end of the couch. Kagome checked the rest of the house, but he didn't seem to be anywhere.

She paused in the dining room, frowning pensively. Where could he be? Had he run away? To her surprise, the thought didn't fill her with the relief she'd thought it would Did that mean she actually wanted him around? Was she actually getting anxious over finding him?

She glanced out the back window and caught a flash of white. Smiling, she headed out the back door. Of course he would get tired of sitting in the house all day. 

Inuyasha was sitting next to the goldfish pond in the back yard, and he didn't turn to face her as she walked up to him, though his ears twitched toward her inquisitively. Kagome had to fight back the irrational and embarrassing desire to touch them. Instead she plopped down next to him, wrapping her arms around her knees and staring out across the pond.

Neither spoke for a while, and to Kagome's surprise, the silence wasn't strained or uncomfortable, though there was a certain tension in the air that she couldn't really describe or identify. 

Shrugging it off, she said, "Thanks for cleaning up the dishes today."

He tensed next to her, a reaction she didn't really understand. But she was beginning to see that his emotions were complex, influenced by painful past experiences that were totally at odds with how he was being treated now. Maybe she just had to be patient with him.

"I ate all your Ramen," he said finally, defensively, still tense. 

She glanced over at him, amused, and jumped when he flinched away from her. "What?" She asked, alarmed.

He studied her cautiously, before slowly straightening and letting his muscles relax slightly. "Nothing," he muttered.

She stared at him a moment longer, wondering at his strange actions. He'd seemed almost afraid of her. Had he thought she was going to hit him or something? A bizarre protectiveness took hold of her. No one would ever hurt him again, she promised herself. No one.

"That's okay," she said carelessly. "I don't like it that much anyway, but I'll buy some more next time I go food shopping." 

He stirred next to her and poked at one of the bags she'd brought out with her suspiciously. "What's that?"

"Oh!" Kagome said, glad for the distraction. "I forgot. I got you clothes - you should try them on and make sure you like them."

She handed the bags to him, and he hesitated only an instant, looking at her face skeptically as if to make sure she was serious before reaching in and pulling out some of the clothing.

He studied it, his face expressionless.

"Well?" Kagome asked. "Do you like it?"

He glanced at her. "This is stuff that people wear. Slaves don't wear this kind of thing."

She felt that inexplicable anger come over her again the way it had when he'd called himself a freak. "You *are* a person!" she cried. Trying to calm herself down she took a breath and said in a more normal tone, "I want you to wear whatever you want to wear, so if you don't like it I'll take it back and you can pick out something you like better." 

"This is fine!" he snapped, taking her by surprise as he took the jacket she'd bought for him and shrugged into it. He fumbled with the zipper for a moment.

"Here," Kagome said, leaning forward to help after realizing that he'd probably never worn anything with a zipper before. "Oh!" she froze, staring at his hands in amazement. At the end of each finger was a small but dangerous-looking, perfectly formed claw. He looked up at her exclamation and realized what had startled her. Angrily he looked away, clenching his hands into fists to hide the claws.

Hesitantly, Kagome reached over and zipped up the jacket for him, careful not to catch any of his hair in it. They sat in silence for a moment before Kagome spoke.

"You you could hurt me if you wanted to. You could have killed all the people who kept you a slave in the past."

Inuyasha shook his head angrily. "You're wrong. There's too many of you. Even if I did fight back and escape they'd hunt me down eventually. And they have chips in some of the slaves - computer chips that force them to obey orders. Their sole purpose is to hunt down renegade slaves and kill them. No one's ever escaped them." He looked away bitterly, but his tone was matter of fact as he said, "If I hadn't been attractive they would have put a chip in my brain too. I would have been one of them."

Kagome looked at him, horrified. She opened her mouth but nothing came out. Horror, cold and alien and stark, bombarded her senses. It went against everything she believed, everything she thought about the world. 

"That's got to stop," she heard herself saying calmly, but it didn't sound like her voice. Surely she didn't have that edge of determination, that strength of conviction in her tone.

Inuyasha looked at her with barely contained disdain. "You can't stop it," he told her. "No one can. It's just how things work so you'd better get used to it."

Kagome shook her head from side to side in denial. "No it doesn't have to be like this - "

"Your phone is ringing," Inuyasha cut her off, gazing back out over the pond.

Kagome paused to listen but couldn't hear anything. Deciding to take his word for it, she stood with a sigh and headed for the house.

@@@

Inuyasha stayed looking out over the pond for another few minutes. That girl he thought, emotions churning through him. She was doing strange things to him. Making him question things he'd previously accepted as facts of life. He'd never enjoyed being a slave, of course, had always thought it was unfair and cruel - but life was unfair and cruel, and never once had he ever stopped to consider the fact that maybe it was wrong.

_Whatever,_ he thought angrily._ There's no point in even thinking about it. She's the only one who thinks this way, and she's crazy. Even if she *were* right it wouldn't change anything._

He lifted his hand to look at his claws - the ones that had frightened Kagome so much. What had made every fiber of his being protest when she'd said that he could hurt her so easily? Why had he needed to bite back a reassurance that he was her guardian and he wouldn't let anything hurt her, much less hurt her himself?

She was only human, only a frail and naïve human female who knew nothing about the world, and who meant nothing to him. He was only here because he had to be, only protecting her and serving her because he had no choice in the matter.

He rubbed his thumb over the sleeve of the jacket she'd gotten for him, fascinated by the rich, thick, new material. It was warm, and the inside of it was lined with fleece that felt strange against the sensitive skin of his throat and the insides of his wrists. Obviously expensive, something he'd only seen the richer men in society wearing. And she'd given it to him to wear. 

Angrily, he reached for the metal zipper she'd done up for him. It took him a moment of tugging before he finally got it undone, and he shrugged out of the jacket and put it back in the bag it had come from. Picking up all the clothes, he stalked into the house and put them down next to the couch he'd slept on last night. He could hear Kagome talking on the phone in the kitchen, and he skulked closer, eavesdropping on her conversation.

"Sure, Rin, I already told you it's no problem. I'll come right over with a copy for you."

There was a pause, and he could faintly hear the person on the other side of the line saying something about being sorry for her forgetfulness, and thanking Kagome for being so nice. Then he heard his name, and strained even harder to hear. Kagome had told someone about him? He'd assumed she was ashamed of him.

He heard Kagome hesitate and then say "I don't know really. I guess I'll ask him. All right. You're welcome! I'll see you in a few minutes."

The two girls hung up and Inuyasha stepped into the kitchen, arms crossed over his chest. "What was that all about?"

"What was what all about?" Kagome asked him, jumping at his sudden entrance. He felt that stir of satisfaction he always felt when he managed to take her off guard. "Oh, that was my friend from school. She lost her homework assignment for one of the classes we have together, so I'm going to go drop off a copy for her. Do you want to come with me?"

Inuyasha blinked, trying to conceal his surprise. Apparently he'd misread the reasons behind her leaving him at home when she went out this morning. Maybe she wasn't ashamed of him at all.

But he was still suspicious. "Why do you want me to come with you now when you left me here this morning?"

Her confusion was evident. "Left you here? I thought you'd *want* to sleep in. Why would you go to my classes with me? You'd probably be bored to tears."

"Because I'm to stupid to understand what was going on?" Inuyasha snarled at her, not understanding why he was so angry.

Kagome took a step back, not sure what she'd done to deserve this. "That wasn't it at all!" she shouted back at him. "You really want to come to my classes with me? Fine! I'll wake you up earlier tomorrow!"

He leaned back, crossing his arms over his chest, pacified but not wanting her to know it. "Feh," he snapped, looking away.

She sighed. "You're so confusing! Do you want to come with me or not?"

Inuyasha battled internally for a moment before giving in to the temptation to see more of the world outside. What could it hurt? And besides, curiosity had always been his major weakness.  


  


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Of all of Inuyasha's demonic features I agree with Kagome - the claws freak me out the most! But she got over her shock quickly enough. And she's finally starting to empathize with him, while Inuyasha is struggling with his feelings toward her - can't really blame him after everything he's been through!


	8. Lose Yourself

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **Okay, I've changed my mind about Kikyo - I think her character is okay now. In the episode where Inuyasha hugs her and she pulls a knife on him and talks about how easy to play with men are I think we see this potential side of her personality. And I hope by the end you'll see that I don't really hate Kikyo - in a way I even admire her. She's stubborn, cold, independent, and she isn't afraid of making judgment calls. She's also loyal to what she believes. So enjoy her introduction, and don't see her as the "bad guy" in this fic - there really isn't a bad guy here, just a bunch of very different people trying to find a way to coexist.**  
**

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 8: Lose Yourself.**

The house they pulled up at was in the city. It was completely different from Kagome's house, though it looked as though its inhabitants were quite wealthy as well. The atmosphere made Inuyasha uneasy, and he glared around him, suddenly wishing he'd stayed at home after all. 

Kagome was already at the door, and he heard the distant ring of a doorbell somewhere inside the house. Reluctantly, he followed her up the stairs, pausing behind her as the door opened to reveal a pretty, pixyish, dark-haired girl who looked about Kagome's age.

"Hi Rin!" Kagome said happily.

"Hey Kagome! Come on in," she said. Inuyasha recognized her voice as the one that had been talking to Kagome over the phone. They stepped into the front hallway, and Rin paused expectantly.

Inuyasha's muscles clenched as he realized instantly that Rin might be Kagome's friend, but she also knew the place of a slave. He dropped his eyes instantly and forced himself to kneel, touching the floor at her feet.

"So this is the slave you told me about," Rin said. "That's funny, he looks a lot like Kikyo's slave. I wonder if they're related or something."

He could feel Kagome's curious eyes on him. "What are you doing, Inuyasha?" He gritted his teeth. Didn't the wench know anything?

"Ah Kagome," Rin said, "He's required to do this upon being introduced. It's a sign of servitude. And you haven't given him permission to speak, so he can't answer you. Wow, you weren't kidding when you said you didn't know what to do with a slave, were you?"

Kagome ignored Rin and crouched down next to him. He lifted his head fractionally to meet her eyes though the white hair falling over his own. Her blue-gray ones were concerned and confused as they searched his, which he knew were burning with the indignation and fury that not even the best slave trainers in the world had been able to quench in him. "You can stand up, okay?" she said softly. "And talk."

Slowly he rose to his feet, feeling his tense muscles uncoil and begin to relax. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Kagome's friend looking on in bewilderment, but she didn't seem upset or offended by Kagome's unorthodox behavior. His anxiety went down another notch.

"Uhh well, come on Kagome. I have a copy machine upstairs." She took the smaller girl by the arm and began to lead her up the winding staircase. 

"But what about Inuyasha?" Kagome said, pausing a little ways up and looking back at him worriedly. 

Inuyasha kept his eyes on the floor, as was customary for a slave.

"He'll wait there of course," Rin said, bewildered. "What else would he do? Come on, Kagome, lets hurry up and get this over with so I can start my homework."

"But - " Kagome's protests faded as she was pulled further up the steps.

Inuyasha now thoroughly regretted leaving the house. This had been a stupid idea - he'd thought he could handle it but it seemed that a few days listening to Kagome talk about equality and having her treat him like a person had renewed and strengthened all the aversion and anger that he felt toward slavery.

He forced himself not to fidget, keeping himself distracted by counting the tiny gray tiles that covered the floor of the hallway. Any moment Kagome would be back and then he could leave this strangely disturbing house and -

He froze as his sensitive ears picked up the sound of footsteps - but not coming from the stairs. These were from the direction of the living room. He didn't move, hoping whoever it was would just continue on and not notice him. But a moment later he was aware of someone standing behind him looking him up and down critically.

"Well what have we here?" a voice said, and it was unfamiliar and cold and sent a shiver of premonition up his spine. This was the voice of the master that he'd been warned about, the cruel, calculating mind of a human who felt no qualms about abusing a slave.

@@@

"Wow, Kagome!" Rin breathed as soon as the two girls were alone. "I've never seen such a good-looking slave. Where did you get him?"

Still unsettled and slightly upset because of the display downstairs, and worried over leaving Inuyasha alone in a strange place, she shrugged distractedly. "I don't know. Some place downtown my aunt took me."

Rin sighed dreamily. "He must be really well trained. You're so lucky!"

Shifting uncomfortably, Kagome silently disagreed. "I don't really think so. I didn't want to buy him, but my aunt wasn't going to let me leave until I did exactly what she wanted, and then she said *she* was going to buy him if I didn't."

"If you didn't want him what would you care what happened to him?" Rin asked curiously.

Kagome frowned, for the first time in her life realizing how disturbingly apathetic everyone seemed when it came to slaves. There was no malice in Rin's voice; she really, sincerely didn't understand where Kagome was coming from. Didn't anyone realize how wrong it was? Was Inuyasha right when he'd said that she was the only one to think that slavery was horrible and inhumane?

"I just felt sorry for him," she defended herself. "He was different from the other slaves there - he was still alive inside."

Some strong emotion flickered across Rin's face. "I know one like that," she said softly. "I guess I understand how you feel now you didn't want to see him broken."

Kagome searched her friend's face, concerned. "Is it Kikyo? Kikyo and Sesshoumaru?"

"Shh!" Rin hissed at her. "Don't call him that here. Kikyo doesn't know I know his name. You aren't supposed to call them by their names, you know," she added reproachfully.

Kagome turned away to put her math homework back in her backpack, deep in thought. "I want to meet him," she said slowly, thoughtfully. "You said he looked like Inuyasha, right? And that he isn't dead inside. Maybe I can help him."

"You can't," Rin said dully. "He's a slave, you know. And he belongs to Kikyo."

"I'd still like to meet him if that's okay with you. Sometime when Kikyo's not around."

Rin shrugged curiously. "I guess so, if you really want to. I'll try to figure out a good time to do it. Kikyo usually leaves on Sunday nights to get her nails done and go out to dinner with her friends. Maybe then."

Kagome nodded slowly. "That sounds good. I should run for now though - I'll talk to you about it later."

"Bye Kagome - good luck with math."

"You too," Kagome said, heading for the stairs. But she was too caught up in other thoughts to really care about schoolwork.

@@@

"What have we here?" The voice continued in a tone that should have been playful, but instead sounded more sinister. "It seems the Higurashi's have excellent taste in slaves despite their lack of experience in the matter." The speaker moved to stand in front of him, and Inuyasha's eyes focused on the dangerous looking spikes on her stilettos as his training kicked in and he knelt to touch the floor at her feet.

She didn't give him permission to rise. The heels pivoted, and she made a purring noise of predatory satisfaction. "You really are a specimen," she observed, and he clamped down on a shudder as he felt the woman's hands trail through his hair, the nails scraping against his scalp - every bit as unnerving and dangerous as his own claws.

"Stand," she barked out, and he rose immediately, hands falling to his sides. "Look up," she ordered, and he did as he was told, staring straight ahead. He'd picked up on the art of looking at someone without actually focusing his eyes on them, and quickly took stock of this woman. She was taller than Rin, and older than both of the other girls. Her hair was thick, dark, and so straight that not a single hair fell out of place around her angular face. She would be considered quite attractive in a classic, utilitarian way. Her eyes, however, were frozen and cruel as a winter ice storm - destructive and filled with elemental power. He'd seen eyes like hers before - in the face of every one of his trainers, his prefects, his instructors.

He felt his conscious mind begin to take shelter.

Her fingers gripped his chin and she tilted his head to observe his profile more carefully before running an appreciative hand down his chest. "Stats?" she all but purred, enjoying the way the golden eyes were slowly becoming more and more blank.

"Inuyasha. Identification 70969Z. Classification A. Rank 4 in temperament." It was customary for a slave to list all rankings that were below 10, and Inuyasha's only aberration was his temper.  
  
"Impressive," the girl murmured. "Open your mouth."

He did as he was told, knowing what was coming next. This was standard procedure during an inspection - indentations on the tongue indicated that a slave was unreceptive to pleasure, biting the tongue to try to repress responses during sex.

"And it looks like you know how to enjoy yourself, too," the woman said, her eyes hooded, telling him that there was no escape. "Maybe you can help me with that"

Her hands moved lower along his body, and Inuyasha felt a flash of panic before he retreated into his mind completely. He could no longer feel her hands. All that was left where he had stood a moment ago was an empty shell that responded to orders. No one could touch him this way. He couldn't be angry or indignant or disgusted if he didn't have a self. They couldn't hurt him. No one could hurt him because he, the hanyou named Inuyasha, didn't really exist anymore.  


  


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I know, I know! Hard place to be forced to stop reading! But what's a drama without a few cliff-hangers? And I promise that you guys will *really* love the next two chapters.


	9. Snapping Out Of It

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **Okay, so in the last chapter when Kikyo was all over Inuyasha and she tells him to open his mouth - that's totally from **Elora's** fic! I meant to mention that in the last chapter but forgot, so I'll mention it here. She gets full credit for that idea - I just liked it so much I had to include it here.

Also, slaves are trained to take orders from anyone who's not a slave. That's why Kikyo could tell him what to do. Not to mention he was completely intimidated by her and by his own lack of control over the situation, which is why he didn't put up a fight. Like I tried to convey in the chapter, he'd never been in a comparable situation, having just gotten out of training and being sold to Kagome imediately thereafter. Slaves are ultimately controlled by their masters though - for example if Kagome and Kikyo both gave Inuyasha an order, he would follow Kagome's without hesitation.

This chapter is all about beginning to build trust... as well as other deep emotions! I know you've all been waiting for it, so I hope you enjoy. It's not too heavy, but hey, it's something!  


**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 9: Snapping Out of It.**

When Kagome came downstairs Inuyasha was standing exactly where she'd left him - but there was a girl with long, straight black hair standing directly in front of him, a little too close to the half-demon for comfort. She couldn't really tell what was going on, but her attention wasn't on the girl anyway - it was on the half-demon who was standing motionless in front of her.

Inuyasha didn't look up at her as she came down the stairs. In fact, he wasn't really focusing on much of anything, and the look in his eyes terrified her.

"Inuyasha?" she said, her voice higher than usual with worry. The girl spun to face Kagome, looking furious at the interruption but her face quickly smoothed over and she gave a cool smile. 

"Kagome, I presume?" the older girl said, not offering her hand. "I was just getting acquainted with your slave. He's very tempting."

The words barely registered with Kagome. She was too frightened by Inuyasha's lack of a response. "Inuyasha, are you okay?" she asked hesitantly. When he didn't respond she turned worried eyes on the other girl who she assumed must be Rin's older sister Kikyo. "Is he okay?"

Kikyo was looking at her with barely disguised contempt. Kagome thought she was going to snap at her for a moment, but the look faded and Kikyo ignored the question, smiling faintly again. "You must be very pleased with him to show such concern. You don't even keep him leashed. And ranked 10 in sexual ability I have to admit I'm quite curious - how is he in bed?"

The comment was as effective as a slap would have been. Kagome reeled back in shock and stared wide-eyed for a moment before disgust took hold of her. She spun away angrily. "Come on, Inuyasha, we're leaving."

To her surprise, he turned immediately and followed her without question or hesitation. Kagome glanced back once at Kikyo's satisfied smirk before slamming the door and practically running to where the car was parked. Inuyasha stopped beside the car, his face still devoid of any kind of expression or emotion. Kagome bit her lip.

"Inuyasha please talk to me?" She whispered. No response. Not even a flicker of eyelashes gave any indication that the hanyou had heard her. She opened up the passenger-side door for him and wondered how on earth she was going to get him in. He'd followed her when she'd told him they were leaving, so maybe he would listen if she told him to get in the car. "Inuyasha Sit."

The command wasn't given with much confidence, and for a moment she was afraid he wasn't going to listen to her. But after a tense moment he got into the car and Kagome quickly shut the door behind him and hurried to the drivers side of the car. She wanted to get the hell away from this house. And she wanted to get Inuyasha home and back to normal as quickly as possible.

@@@

Kagome sighed, resting her chin in her hand and staring disconsolately across the kitchen table at Inuyasha, who stared back over her head blankly. 

"Come on, Inuyasha! Stop acting so strangely. This is getting old."

Nothing.

"Are you tired? Do you want me to leave you alone so you can go to sleep?"

He hadn't twitched since she'd gotten him in the house. He'd barely even blinked, and it was really starting to unnerve her. He had to go back to normal sometime didn't he?

"Do you want some Ramen, Inuyasha? I bet you're hungry again." Ugh, she thought, getting desperate. If that didn't snap him out of it, what will?

She sat there for another moment, studying him pensively. Suddenly, she sat up straight, snapping her fingers. "Maybe you just need your memory jogged! Lets see, what can I show you that will get you to remember everything?" She thought for another moment. "Follow me," she told him, heading into the living room. She pointed at the couch. "Remember sleeping there, Inuyasha? You watched TV."

No sign of recognition was forthcoming, so she glanced around for more inspiration. Seeing her shopping bags from earlier beside the couch, she pulled out the coat he'd worn out by the pond. "This is your coat," she told him, feeling ridiculous. "You were wearing it by the pond. Can you remember the pond?" Maybe I should show it to him, she thought dully, though she was starting to think this method was just as useless as the others she'd tried.

"Come on," she said, heading out back. The air was cold, and she hugged herself as they made their way across the grass to stand next to the glassy surface of the water. "Still doesn't ring a bell, huh?" she sighed, when all he did was pause on the rocks by the edge of the water, still with that monotonous, expressionless stare.

"What's wrong with you?" she yelled at him, her worry starting to be expressed through panicky anger. "You're acting like some kind of android!"

She waited a moment more, getting more and more angry every second. "This isn't funny!" she shouted, surprised to find herself close to tears. "Do you hear me, you stupid jerk? This isn't a joke!" Impulsively, she stepped forward and gave him a solid, straight-armed shove - right into the goldfish pond.

She gasped, shocked at herself, as he went under with a splash. What had she been thinking? Shock was quickly replaced by delight as Inuyasha thrashed in the water, coming up sputtering with his hair plastered against his head. "What the hell?!" he shouted, looking around him in fury.

Happiness overtook her, and before she could think about what she was doing Kagome had dropped the coat she'd been carrying and flung herself at him, ignoring the cold water and mud that splashed over her.

He looked up, his eyes widening, just before she flung her arms around his neck and buried her face in his wet hair. "You're back!" she cried, ignoring the tenseness of his body, which had gone rigid with shock and uncertainty.

"K-Kagome?" he said disbelievingly. "What happened? Are you okay?"

She pushed back to glare at him, pointing an accusing finger at his nose. Her blue-gray eyes were dark with irritation. "Am *I* okay?" she parroted, her voice full of furious reproach. "You've been acting like a zombie for the past hour and a half! You wouldn't talk to me at all! I even offered you Ramen," she continued, relief making her waspish, "but nothing worked. What *happened* to you?!"

He'd been staring at her, caught somewhere between astonishment and wariness, his whole body poised as if to flee, but now she felt him relaxing slightly, looking around to take in their current situation. "I'm wet," he said slowly, glancing down at her. "You pushed me in the pond?"

Kagome felt herself blushing. "What else was I supposed to do?" she asked defensively. "It worked, didn't it?"

"Apparently," he said dryly, and Kagome's anger abated slightly. She'd never heard humor in his voice before, and she was just so relieved that he was finally talking to her. Emotion swamped her and she flung her arms around him once more, taking him off guard for the second time. 

"Don't ever do that again!" she gasped, her voice muffled against his shoulder.

"Kagome" he said in a different tone completely, lifting one dripping hand and touching her side lightly. She started at the touch, and abruptly it hit her that she had all but attacked him. Suddenly all she was aware of was the warmth of his body against hers, the feel of the muscles in his chest against the palms of her hands, the whisper of his breath against her wet skin. She launched herself away from him, stumbling in the water and falling on her rear end facing him, her eyes wide as saucers.

"Wh-what are you doing?" she all but shrieked at him.

"Me?" he demanded, the confusion in his eyes replaced by his more typical defensive anger. "*I'm* the one who got pushed in the pond! Are you trying to kill me or something?"

"Of course not!" she shouted back, her fists clenching in the muddy bottom of the pond. "How can you say something like that! I left you alone for five minutes and when I came downstairs that girl Kikyo was molesting you or something and - " she broke off at the look on his face. 

For a moment she was afraid she'd given him a relapse back into zombie-land, but then his fangs flashed dangerously and he growled. Kagome's eyes widened in fear and amazement. It wasn't the kind of growl she'd expected, the type where a human was trying to imitate an animal. This was a *real* growl, low and guttural, starting somewhere in his chest and rumbling up through his throat in a way that sent chills of premonition down her back.

"That bitch," he snarled, and his voice had deepened too, become more rasping and feral. His eyes flashed a predatory gold. "That fucking *bitch*!"

He was suddenly on his feet, towering over her threateningly, and Kagome pressed her back against the rocks behind her in complete terror, staring up at him with huge eyes. "She knew I belonged to someone else but she was going to take me anyway. She *touched* me, and I couldn't do anything about it!"

He paused then, and the fury in his eyes lessened as he seemed to remember her. She was sitting in the cold water at his feet, half-submerged, her knees tucked tightly to her chest and her eyes wide and frightened. Slowly, the murderous fury seemed to leave him.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I didn't know, Inuyasha. I'm so sorry"

"Why are you apologizing to me?" he demanded gruffly, but she could tell he wasn't angry anymore - or at least, not with her. "It wasn't you who did it." He glanced up at the house, then down at her again with a sigh. "Baka. You're going to freeze to death."

He reached down, offering her his hand. Kagome hesitated for a moment, a vision of his fangs catching the moonlight and the fury in his eyes flashing through her mind. She stared at the claws on the hand that he'd extended to her before slowly, cautiously, slipping her cold fingers into his.  


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I really wanted to have Kagome tell Inuyasha to sit as she pushed him into the pond, but there's no way I could have done that without making the whole thing seem ridiculous. But I hope you noticed my reference earlier in the chapter! Chapter 10 has more bonding time, so psych yourselves up!


	10. Thawing Out

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **Wow, you guys are great reviewers - thanks so much for all your support and encouragement! Unfortunately I'm in the middle of final exams right now, and haven't had much of a chance to keep writing the story. I've gotten to somewhere around the middle of the fic (~ch.16) and this is the slowest part of the story so I'm having trouble getting the chapters out of my head. But once I get through this the ending chapters are going to be so much fun and a piece of cake! I'm still trying to keep the chapters coming one a day despite my slowness (luckily I wrote a lot of it and got a head start before I started getting stressed) but I'm thinking as it gets closer to christmas you guys might have to wait just a *little* bit longer between chapters.

I'm also sorry about the shortness of the chapters - The only way I can really stay motivated and keep myself focused on what's going on in the story and when is to divide it up into little pieces. So what you're getting every day is my brain's idea of a chunk that it can deal with and handle without getting overwhelmed. The story is about 50 pages in MS word at the moment, which is an average length story for me. Since I'm about halfway through I'm guessing about 100 pages for the completed story.

Ah, and my personal favorite subject - lemon. Yes, I really am a hentai, though I think it's hard to tell at first glance. I was originally planning to make this a lemon, but like I said in the previous chapters the tone kinda took a more innocent shade and Inuyasha and Kagome decided they'd rather keep it clean. This is very distressing because I went through all the trouble of making Inuyasha such a fantastic lover and everything, and now he's turned all respectable on me. Don't lose hope, though - I may be able to work something at least moderately satisfying in there, though it won't have all the detail and raciness of a true lemon. *sigh* You'd think I'd have more say in my own damn story!

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 10: Thawing out.**

Not wasting any time, he hauled her unceremoniously to her feet, and she stumbled again in the slippery mud. Before she could fall though, he'd climbed effortlessly out of the pond, dragging her with him as if she weighed nothing at all. He started purposefully toward the house, but Kagome dug in her heels in protest. "Wait!"

He steadied her on her feet, glaring down at her as she shivered. "What?" he snapped ungraciously.

"We can't go in there like this!" she told him. "We'll track muddy water all over the house."

He rolled his eyes. "You'd rather stand out here and catch hypothermia?"

Kagome looked around desperately for inspiration. She spotted Inuyasha's coat lying on the ground by the pond and smiled. "I'll wear your coat in," she told him, moving toward it, "and I'll get you a towel from the house. We can leave our wet clothes out here until tomorrow."

He shrugged. "Whatever. Just hurry up."

She glared at him. "I will as soon as you turn around, you pervert!"

With a menacing growl at the insinuation, he whirled in the other direction, splattering water droplets from his wet hair. "As if I'd even *want* - "

"You'll shut up if you know what's good for you!" Kagome shrieked, outraged. His words died down to inaudible mumbling, which she guessed was good enough. Stripping off the clothes as quickly as she could, she wrapped his warm coat around herself. Feeling slightly better she murmured, "This really is a nice coat Maybe I should keep it for myself."

He threw her a wounded look over her shoulder, but it quickly turned to a glare as he caught her mischievous grin. "So you *do* like it," she said, pleased with the unconscious admission.

"Just get me a towel, wench!" he snapped, nose up in the air.

Kagome sighed, trudging barefoot toward the house. "So we're back to wench again. I thought you managed my name pretty well earlier"

She shut the door on his ominous growl.

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Half an hour later, they were both showered and changed into warm clothing. Kagome padded into the living room in her slippers carrying two cups of hot chocolate. Handing one to Inuyasha, she settled herself comfortably on the couch.

For a few minutes she was content to stare blankly at whatever he was watching on TV while she formulated what she wanted to say. She had to know more about what had happened to make him lose it like that.

She reached over and grabbed the remote from him, deftly clicking off the television. He glared over at her. "I was watching that."

Kagome shrugged impishly. "You're the one with the supernatural reflexes But seriously. I want to ask you about some stuff."

His face changed and he sat back, taking a gulp of his hot chocolate. His eyes widened and he choked. 

Kagome reached over to grab the mug from him before he could spill it all over the place. "Be careful!" she admonished him. "That's just out of the microwave!"

Inuyasha panted for a moment, trying to deal with the pain. 

"Are you okay?" Kagome asked, concerned. 

"Ow."

With a sigh, she put both mugs down on the coffee table. "Inuyasha what happened tonight?"

He swallowed, still feeling as if his burned tongue were three sizes too big for his mouth. "I reverted," he said matter-of-factly, trying not to slur his speech. 

She waited for him to elaborate, and when he didn't she asked, "What's that?"

"It's how slaves deal with things they can't control," he said shortly. "They shut down everything but the most basic mental functions. They respond to commands but they aren't really *there*."

Kagome winced as sudden comprehension dawned. "That's why all the others I saw at that store"

"Sometimes slaves never come out of it," Inuyasha confirmed grimly. "There's nothing worth coming back for."

"What did she do to you to make that happen?" Kagome asked softly. 

He bit back a growl, not wanting to talk about it. "I told you already. She touched me - and she was going to do more than that."

Kagome bit her lip, fear and disgust battling for dominance inside her. When she looked up, her eyes were full of angry determination. "I don't want that to happen to you ever again," she told him, her voice deceptively calm. He glanced over, taken off guard by the depth of emotion in her eyes. 

"Is that an order?" he asked, slight sarcasm edging his voice.

She glared. "If I have to make an order I will!"

He snorted in derision. "You don't even know *how* to give an order."

"I - I order you never to take any more orders," she said angrily. "And never to let anyone do anything to you without your permission!"

His contrariness faded instantly. "That's a pretty stupid order to give. Now you can't tell me what to do."

Kagome smiled triumphantly. "That's perfectly fine with me. I never wanted to tell you what to do to begin with!"

Inuyasha slouched down, crossing his arms over his chest and looking the other way. He obviously wanted to be left alone, but Kagome was feeling decidedly playful. "I think we should practice," she told him cheerfully.

His ears twitched toward her, but he didn't look at her. "Practice what?"

"You need to practice not obeying orders," she informed him calmly, twisting to face him on the couch. "Are you ready? Look at me."

He glanced over at her sullenly, and Kagome shook her head in disappointment. "No, no, no. You're not supposed to listen to me, remember? Try again."

"This is stupid," Inuyasha complained. "I'm a slave. You can't just tell me not to obey orders."

"Are you arguing with me?" Kagome asked, glaring at him.

"N-"

"Aha! You lose again!" Kagome cried, pointing at him accusingly. "Tell me how amazing and talented I am."

He gave her a look out of the corner of his eye, and Kagome could have sworn his mouth was quirking up in the beginnings of a smile. "No."

"That's better," Kagome said approvingly. "Now go to sleep. We'll practice more later."

"I don't want to go to sleep," he informed her, reaching for the remote. 

She grabbed it first and held it out of reach, raising her eyebrows at him. "Oh really? What *do* you want to do?"

"None of your business!"

Kagome laughed and handed him the remote. "I think you're getting the hang of it."

Inuyasha pointedly ignored her as she stood up, focusing on the TV while she grabbed both mugs of unfinished hot chocolate.

She deposited them in the kitchen sink and headed for the stairs, pausing to poke her head into the living room and check on Inuyasha. He looked as though he was set for the night, lying across the couch in the clothes Kagome had bought for him, propped up on one elbow and flipping through random TV channels.

"Do you still want to go to classes with me tomorrow?" she asked. She had no intention of dealing with a cranky Inuyasha in the morning if he'd changed his mind between this afternoon and now.

He barely glanced up. "Whatever," he muttered carelessly.

Kagome frowned. "You'd better get some sleep if you're going to be waking up early then!"

"I don't need as much sleep as humans do," he told her, "so maybe you should take your own advice."

Kagome just shook her head in exasperation and started up the stairs toward her bedroom. He was energetic, she'd give him that much. But for her it had been a long day, and she was completely exhausted.  


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They're so cute together... I really can't see Kagome with anyone other than Inuyasha anymore. And for my next trick - Miroku shows up! The only male with a major role in my story who isn't going to be a slave!


	11. Knowledge Is Power

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **All right! This is actually one of my favorite chapters so far, just because of Miroku. After this it gets more serious, but liberal amounts of humor will hopefully work their way in. I'm nearly done with finals, as well as the great ordeal of christmas shopping, so I'll have more time to write in the near future! Thanks for all your reviews and your support! 3

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 11: Knowledge is Power.**

Inuyasha followed Kagome through the halls of her school, feeling as though he were in an episode of the twilight zone. They'd just arrived and were headed for Kagome's first class. All around them other students milled about, moving purposefully or talking loudly in groups of varying sizes.

That wasn't the weird part. The weird part was that Inuyasha, dressed in normal clothes and a long sleeved shirt that covered up the identification bracelet that conveyed the fact that he was a slave, was indistinguishable from the rest of the crowd.

No one knew he was a slave. He didn't have to keep his eyes on the ground, or moderate his steps. He could reach out and touch things if they caught his interest. He could look the other students in the eye, and when he did he received only a curious glance or a friendly smile in return. It was clear that his ears startled people, since Yokai were rare, and free Yokai were even rarer, but not so rare that seeing one was anything more than a vague surprise.

This was creepy. But, in a strange way that was slowly growing on him, it was heady and empowering and almost like magic. If these people couldn't tell by looking at him that he was a slave then maybe Maybe there *was* no special quality that distinguished slaves. Maybe they really were just normal people who had been in the wrong place at the wrong time. And maybe being around Kagome was fucking with his head more than he'd originally thought.

Damn it, Kagome, he thought uneasily. You're in way over your head here. You don't understand what you're playing around with the people you could potentially upset! But it was hard to keep his reservations in mind when everything around him was so much more interesting and nothing in his immediate vicinity looked even remotely threatening.

"Kagome!" It was a boy's voice, coming from behind them. Inuyasha glanced over his shoulder, but Kagome hadn't heard the voice yet.

A young man broke through the crowd, of medium height and with boyish good looks and dark hair pulled back in a stumpy ponytail at the nape of his neck. "Kagome!" he shouted again, making his way toward them.

Finally hearing him, Kagome turned around. Upon spotting the boy coming toward them, her eyes widened and something akin to panic entered them.

"M-Miroku!" she exclaimed, taking an edgy step backward and feigning delighted surprise. Inuyasha looked the boy over again, reassessing him for danger since something about him was definitely making Kagome skittish. But there was nothing threatening about him at all - just a charming smile and an eager spark in his eyes as he skidded to a halt in front of Kagome and Inuyasha. 

"Kagome-sama, I must say that the past few years have increased your loveliness tenfold."

Inuyasha's eyes narrowed slightly as the boy clasped Kagome's hand and she gave him a bright, fake smile while inching her way toward him as if for protection. If only Inuyasha knew what she wanted to be protected *from*.

"Thank you Miroku! You, uh, look pretty good too!"

"You're too generous, Kagome!" he gushed, and Inuyasha's sharp eyes picked up on the spark of mischief in his expression. His grip on her hands tightened, and his gaze turned soulful. "Kagome," he said seriously, leaning in closer as she leaned away from him. "I know that you rejected my proposal two years ago, but I can't help but hope that time has changed your mind - "

*Smack!* 

Kagome glared at a rather dazed Miroku from behind Inuyasha, who was still confused but trying to look threatening anyway. "Miroku! I will *NOT* bear your child!"

Everyone in the hallway paused. Conversation stopped, and Kagome turned bright red as the students all around them gaped in avid curiosity. Shaking off his dejection quickly, Miroku tried to get hold of Kagome's hands again, but Inuyasha shifted to block him with a menacing glare and felt Kagome squeeze his upper arm gratefully. "Ah, Kagome-sama Alas, it seems I must resign myself to rejection."

"As if you even understand the meaning of the word," Kagome muttered under her breath, and Inuyasha tried not to smile. Out loud she said, "What are you doing here, anyway?"

He straightened up, shrugging. "I'm actually looking for Rin."

Kagome gasped. "Miroku! She's your cousin!"

He waved his hands in front of him frantically. "Nothing like that! I swear! I'm staying with her and her sister for the next few months and I'm supposed to be attending classes with her today but I got distracted and now I'm not sure where she is."

"Distracted huh?" Kagome said knowingly. "Did this distraction perchance have a short skirt?"

Miroku sighed longingly, his eyes going slightly hazy as he relived whatever 'distraction' he'd found so appealing.

In an attempt to get his mind out of the gutter Kagome said, "Why aren't you in school?" 

"I found the atmosphere stifling," he said breezily. "I'm a wanderer, really, a traveling scholar. I wanted to see the world, have adventures - "

"You got accused of sexual harassment again, didn't you?" Kagome said flatly.

Miroku laughed, scratching his head lightly. "Well, enough about me! Who's your friend, Kagome?"

"Oh, how rude of me!" Kagome smiled, finally coming out from behind his back to stand beside him. "Inuyasha, meet Miroku, Rin's cousin. Miroku, meet my friend Inuyasha!"

"It's an honor to make your acquaintance," Miroku said, reaching to shake his hand.

Inuyasha's head was spinning. Being introduced as an equal? As if he weren't a slave at all? Kagome nudged him discreetly and he shook Miroku's hand, trying to look as though it was nothing new to him. "Uh, yeah, you too," he muttered, feeling excruciatingly self-conscious. 

Kagome glanced around at the rapidly clearing hallway and cleared her throat. "We've got to be getting to class now, but since you can't seem to find Rin you can come with us. The class I have after this one is one of the two that I share with her, so you'll be able to meet up with her there."

Miroku's face brightened and he nodded a pleased assent.

Inuyasha hung back as they set out down the hall again, trying to get a minute to talk to Kagome. When he was sure Miroku was out of hearing range, he hissed, "What the hell are you doing? You let him think I was just your friend rather than your slave!"

"You mean you don't want to be my friend?" Kagome asked him, her face reflecting hurt.

He paused at her question, disbelieving. "That's not what I meant - Kagome, you don't understand - "

"Then it's settled!" Kagome said brightly. "You *are* my friend, and that's all that matters." She turned and caught up with Miroku, leaving him with no other option than to follow her. He only hoped that the situation didn't get any more out of control - he had a very bad feeling about all of this.

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Rin was glad to see that Miroku hadn't been lost in the throngs of large-chested girls that held him so captivated, though she gave Kagome a pitying look when she learned that the first half of her day had been spent in his company. She looked surprised to see Inuyasha, and was clearly confused and a little uncomfortable with the way he was dressed in normal clothing, but she didn't say anything to give away his status, and soon the reservation melted away. Rin wasn't one to worry, nor did she ever let petty things interfere with her sunny attitude.

Kagome was grateful for her friend's discretion and her gift of remaining non-judgmental. It was good to know that Rin would support her if she chose not to follow society's mandates on how slaves should be treated.

While the professor was lecturing, Rin passed Kagome a small slip of paper that read: "Everything looks good for Sunday. Kikyo will be out of the house until ten that night, so you should come over around eight if you want to talk to Sesshoumaru." Kagome read it, then nodded once at Rin. She was interested to see if he really did look like Inuyasha, and even more interested to see how he felt about slavery. She didn't completely understand her sudden obsession with the subject, but meeting Inuyasha had suddenly made it's ethics a top priority for her.

The aforementioned white-haired boy was glaring at her suspiciously, having seen the transaction between the two girls. Kagome smiled at him reassuringly, and turned her attention back to the professor, taking copious notes for the rest of the class.  


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I love Miroku... he's such a lech! Will he ever get a girl? Guess you'll have to wait and see! Next chapter... lets just say things get a little exciting - and I think some of you are going to kill me after reading it... 


	12. Pains Of Separation

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **I am soo soooooo sorry for the long delay between updates. I moved back home, bringing my computer with me, and for the past four days I have had no internet access! Forgive me! I feel really terrible since this chapter is anything but fulfilling, but I promise I'll be back to updating on a daily basis now. So you'll get the next chapter tomorrow - happy holidays!

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 12: Pains of Separation.**

The walk back to the car was punctuated by somewhat uneasy silence between Kagome and Inuyasha. Kagome knew that he'd been unnerved and uncomfortable with being treated as a normal person, but after his initial complaint when she'd introduced him to Miroku he'd seemed to accept it.

A little ways away from the car Kagome paused, remembering that she needed to pick up a few things for the house. 

"I just remembered, Inuyasha - I need to buy some more milk and a new bottle of conditioner. Do you mind waiting here for five minutes while I run to the convenient store down the street?"

Inuyasha glared, not opposing her, but obviously not happy about the delay either. "I'll get you some more Ramen," Kagome cajoled. His annoyance melted away and she laughed, handing him her backpack and turning to jog in the other direction. "I'll be right back, I promise!"

The convenient store wasn't far, and she quickly reached her destination. The shampoo and the milk were easy to find, but Ramen was nowhere to be seen. She went up to the front of the store, waiting her turn in line.

"Excuse me - do you have any Ramen?" she asked the clerk at the front desk.

"No, we don't carry that," he told her, ringing up her other purchases, "But you can go to the supermarket - it's very close to here. If you go around this building and to the street on the other side you can't miss it."

"Thanks," Kagome replied, paying for the items and going back out onto the street. She quickly spotted the small alleyway between the convenient store and a second building. Skirting the trash cans stacked there and reaching the other side quickly, she saw the large supermarket across the street. 

Ramen was in stock there, and it didn't take long at all to buy several packages of it. Kagome shivered as she stepped back outside after paying for the food. It was getting dark so early, she thought ruefully. Shorter daylight hours were one of the few things she hated about winter.

Looping her bags around her wrists so that she could shove her hands into her pockets, Kagome set out back to the car. She was halfway through the alleyway when it happened - the entrance on the other side was blocked by a group of older boys.

She froze, her heart beginning to pound. No reason to be afraid, she told herself firmly. They're probably just cutting through here too. But something about them raised the hairs on the back of her neck and kept her rooted to the spot.

One of the boys looked up and spotted her, nudging his two friends. The were all looking at her now, saying something that she couldn't hear and didn't want to. Without a backward glance, Kagome turned and ran. 

There was a quick yell, and then footsteps pounded heavily on the pavement behind her. Before Kagome could reach the safety of the street, someone grabbed her and threw her up against the wall of the alley.

"Don't look so scared," one of them said. "We're not gonna hurt you. We just want your money."

Kagome stared at them, too frightened to really comprehend what he was saying.

Another boy, the one holding her arm and who'd thrown her against the wall, wasn't so nice. "Hurry up, we haven't got all day," he snapped at her, and she felt the cold touch of metal on her throat. A knife. "Just hand over your wallet and everyone can go home happy."

She didn't waste any time in fumbling for her jacket pocket, trying to get her wallet free. These jerks would be sadly disappointed anyway; she never carried cash on her, preferring to use credit card for just this reason. By the time they had a chance to use it she'd have cancelled the card anyway.

A sudden voice startled all of them. "What the hell is going on here?"

The three thugs accosting her looked up, and the grip on Kagome's arm loosened. She paused, trying to see who'd spoken - the voice sounded familiar.

The boy from her math class - Naraku, Rin had said his name was - was standing in the alley glaring at the three boys furiously. "You assholes," he swore at them. "Didn't I tell you not to do anything stupid? Don't you know who this girl is?"

They stared at him blankly, and Kagome felt relief wash through her. She was saved. "That's Kagome Higurashi," Naraku continued angrily. "I know I've told you about her. What the hell were you thinking to try to mug her?"

Her arm was released completely and they stepped away from her sheepishly. "Sorry boss - didn't realize - "

Naraku ignored them, moving in on Kagome. She blinked, not entirely reassured by the look in his eyes. And had those other guys called him boss?

"Are you all right, Kagome?"

"Y-yes," she said shakily. "I was just scared. I want to go home."

He reached out and put a hand on her shoulder in a way that might have been comforting if it hadn't seemed so creepy. Kagome didn't want him touching her. "So Kagome, I've been meaning to talk to you for a while now. I noticed you in class right away - you're really beautiful you know."

Kagome stared up at him in amazement. How could he be talking about that kind of thing at a time like this? "Uh.. Th-thanks," she stuttered.

He moved closer, and Kagome's body tensed, her heart starting to pound painfully again as she realized that she wasn't out of danger yet. "I really admire you," he told her, his black eyes shining eerily in the darkness. "You're so accomplished and coordinated."

"I have to go now," Kagome said in a rush, her standard stuck-with-a-jerk-at-a-party response.

He shook his head slowly, his other hand moving to her waist, trapping her. "You're not going anywhere."

His head descended to kiss her, but Kagome turned her face to the side at the last minute, letting out a bloodcurdling scream as she brought her knee up into his groin as hard as she could.

He doubled over, but didn't lose his grip on her. "Bitch!" he choked out, his fingers tightening painfully. "You'll pay for that!"

"No!" Kagome started to struggle in earnest, but then she felt other hands, the hands of his friends, holding her still, keeping her from getting away.

A laugh - "She's a real hellcat boss!"

"Watch out - someone grab her legs - "

Kagome closed her eyes, tears of frustration and fear squeezing past her eyelids. How could this be happening to her?

Suddenly the hands on her body disappeared. She heard a grunt of pain, followed by the sound of a body smashing into the ground. She was flung to the side, landing hard on the cold pavement. Almost afraid to look, Kagome slowly cracked one eye open, then gaped in amazement.

Inuyasha stood there, surrounded by the crumpled bodies of her attackers. He was holding the knife that one of the thugs had held to her throat, and glaring at the only opponent left standing - Naraku.

Kagome gasped. "Inuyasha, watch out!" she cried, as Naraku produced a weapon seemingly out of nowhere and pointed the gun at the half-demon.

"Who the hell are you?" Naraku snarled, his eyes cold, his aim unwavering.

Inuyasha ignored him completely, as if he wasn't even a threat. He glanced over at Kagome. "Should I kill him?" he asked evenly.

She stared, disbelieving. He was acting like Naraku didn't have any advantage over him at all! "What - " 

She was cut off by the sound of Naraku cocking the gun. Inuyasha turned his attention back to the dark-haired boy, his golden eyes filled with disdain and anger. 

"Kill me? As if you could!" Naraku sneered. "Say your prayers, freak."

Kagome screamed and squeezed her eyes shut as Naraku pulled the trigger.  


  


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I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Next chapter will be your christmas present - up asap tomorrow, I promise!

And just as an explanation, Naraku wasn't trying to rape Kagome. At first he was just getting all cuddly in his creepy, emotionally screwed up way, and then he was pissed cuz she kneed him in the family jewels. He might have killed her if Inuyasha hadn't heard her scream. He's a terrible person, but he deserves pity imo, since he's really just messed up and socially inept. (I wanted to make that clear because I just don't feel like I'm qualified to write about something as serious and traumatizing as sexual assault, especially as I have never experienced it.)


	13. Don't Let Me Fall

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **To clarify something I think is a little difficult to see at this point (though it will become clear later), Inuyasha is in a very dangerous position right now - he's not just being stubborn and overreacting to Kagome treating him like he's not a slave. People can't punish Kagome for letting Inuyasha act above his station - she's not a slave, and her family is way too important and powerful. So anything she does wrong will be taken out on Inuyasha. Hope that makes things a little clearer.

Happy Holidays everyone! Hope you all got what you wanted and that this chapter is a little more satisfying than the last one! ^_^

**And for everyone who reviewed saying the Inuyasha was going to kick some ass... of course he's going to kick some ass!   
**

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 13: Don't Let Me Fall.**

She sobbed, still holding her eyes tightly shut with both hands covering her face. She couldn't bear to see, she really couldn't

"Hey!" Kagome gasped and jerked her head up in shock at Inuyasha's voice. "You didn't answer my question wench," he told her irritatably. "Do you want me to kill him or not?" 

Inuyasha was no longer standing a few feet away from Naraku - now he was standing right in front of him, holding the terrified boy two feet off the ground with one hand. The gun lay discarded on the ground beside him.

"You're okay," she whispered slowly. Then, "How could you scare me like that, you jerk! I thought you were dead!"

Inuyasha blinked, then glared back at her. "I just saved your life, you ungrateful little - "

"Please!" Naraku rasped, cutting him off. "Please don't kill me"

Inuyasha glanced over at Kagome grimly. "It's up to Kagome, you sick bastard."

Kagome felt tears rising again. "I just want to go home! I want to pretend this never happened!"

Inuyasha seemed to consider for a moment. "Soo I should kill him?"

Kagome shook her head back and forth violently. "Don't kill him."

Naraku rasped in relief, still clawing at Inuyasha's vice-like grip on his throat. Inuyasha frowned, looking sorely disappointed. "Can I at least hurt him?" he wheedled plaintively. "Just a little bit?"

"Inuyasha!"

He heaved a sigh. "I'll just tie them up then."

While he was working on binding Naraku's wrists - none too gently - Kagome got to her feet shakily and walked back to the nearest payphone to call the police. Within minutes the area of the crime was flooded with people, and Naraku and his friends were being taken away in handcuffs.

The police took statements from both Kagome and Inuyasha, assuring Kagome that Naraku would get the maximum sentence for assault with a dangerous weapon, while his friends would be judged harshly for their complicity and for attempting to mug her. The one who questioned her asked about her family and told her that he would personally go over the details of the trial with her mother so that she wouldn't have to deal with any of it. Knowing how influential her mother was, Kagome didn't doubt that Naraku would never be able to get near her again.

After what seemed like hours of questioning and going over the details, punctuated by someone asking her if she was *sure* she didn't need medical attention at least every five minutes, they finally started to clear out. Kagome leaned back against the wall, overwhelmed and exhausted and weak with relief that the ordeal was finally over. As the last police car drove off, she sank down against the wall and wrapped her arms around her knees, leaning her head forward as if to block out the entire world.

"Hey." She looked up to see Inuyasha standing over her, arms crossed impatiently. "Are you just going to sit there? I thought you wanted to go home."

Kagome sniffed, struggling with her tears. "I dropped the milk," she told him in a small voice. "And your Ramen. And - "

"How can you think about stuff like that at a time like this?" Inuyasha demanded hotly. 

Kagome only sniffled again, wiping at her nose with her sleeve. Inuyasha held up a bag in front of her face. "Here. I found the stuff you dropped so you can stop crying now."

"I'm not crying!" Kagome protested, swiping her hand across her eyes again innocuously. 

Above her, Inuyasha heaved a long-suffering sigh before turning and crouching down with his back facing her. "Well? Hurry up and climb on."

"What?" Kagome queried, not understanding what he meant. He turned and glared at her over his shoulder, his golden eyes catching the moonlight and throwing it out at her in a way that was almost hypnotizing.

"Get on my back," he said, as if to a slow child. "Unless you'd rather stay here than go home."

Slowly she gathered her legs under her and stood shakily. Hesitantly she put one hand on his shoulder. Feeling her pause, Inuyasha took matters into his own hands, reaching back to catch her behind the knees and straightening easily from his crouch. Kagome let out a surprised little cry and fell against his back.

"Inuyasha!" she began indignantly, but her reproach was ended abruptly as he took off, forcing her to fling her arms around his neck and cling to him for support. She couldn't even scream as the feeling of freefall in the pit of her stomach stole her breath and the ground moved away from them at an alarming speed.

Feeling her tension and her fear, Inuyasha curled his arms more securely around her legs. "Relax, would you? I'm not going to let you fall."

Slowly, ever so slowly, she obeyed. The trembling bundle of scattered nerves became a warm, soft weight against his back, and her head dropped to rest in the curve between his nape and shoulder, arms draped warmly around his neck.

Kagome sighed in contentment. She'd been so cold and so afraid, and it was so *nice* to just relax against Inuyasha's warmth and strength. She felt herself drifting in and out of sleep, but she wasn't afraid of falling anymore. If he said he wouldn't drop her then she trusted him.

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Inuyasha carried the sleeping Kagome into the house and closed the door behind them. Moving to the living room he dropped the bag he'd been carrying onto the floor and turned to let Kagome slide off his back and onto the couch. Immediately she curled into a ball, cuddling up against one of his pillows.

"Hey! Kagome! Wake up and go to your own room."

She sighed contentedly. "Mmmnope. Sleeping here."

He glared indignantly down at her. "You can't sleep there - that's where I sleep."

"S'ok. Y'can have my bed," she told him agreeably. "For tonight."

He frowned. Sleep in Kagome's bed while she got the couch? That wasn't going to work. This whole arrangement just wasn't acceptable at all. With a sigh, he leaned down and picked her up in his arms, frowning when she took the pillow she'd been cuddling with her. He carried her up the stairs, nudging the door to the room with the clearest scent of Kagome defining it. He blinked at the room, nonplussed. This wasn't a bedroom - he snorted with amusement. Kagome *would* spend more time in her study than in her own room. Trying the next door down, he found the correct room and carried the sleeping girl to her bed.

He set her down carefully, easing her head from his shoulder to the pillows. She murmured something indistinguishable and hugged the pillow more tightly. "You'd better give that back," Inuyasha threatened, reaching to pull it from her grip.

Kagome frowned in her sleep and rolled over on top of the pillow, refusing to relinquish her hold on it.

Thwarted, Inuyasha hovered over her indecisively. "Fine, you can have it," he told her, "But I'm stealing it back tomorrow!"

When there was no response from the unconscious Kagome, he sighed, feeling slightly ridiculous. As an afterthought, he absently folded the edge of her blanket over her to keep her from being cold during the night before retreating from the room and closing the door.

Today had been a harrowing experience for the hanyou. First he'd deceived everyone into thinking he wasn't a slave, and then Kagome had been attacked. His brow creased, bothered by the strength of his reaction to seeing her being accosted by that asshole. It hadn't been the response of a slave whose duty it was to protect his master. Something deeper, more disturbing.

*You're my friend, and that's all that matters,* Kagome's voice echoed in his mind. He shook his head as if to clear it. _I don't have friends,_ he told himself firmly. But how else could he explain it?

With a growl, he sprawled across the couch. _What are you doing to me, Kagome?_ He thought uneasily, staring out the bay window at the pinpricks of light that twinkled in the midnight sky.

Everything was happening too quickly. His life had been so simple last week - everything had been planned out for him, preordained, beyond his control. Now, suddenly, he was thinking about things in new ways, worrying about things he'd never thought he would have to consider. It was all very frustrating and new to him. Before all this had happened Before he'd gotten a taste of what freedom might be like Before Kagome.

Another sigh, and he rolled over to his back and stared thoughtfully up at the ceiling. The most disconcerting thing about all this uncertainty and disorganization was that he actually *liked* it. The taste he'd gotten so far had made him hungry for more. _I couldn't go back now_, he realized, with a pang of anxiety. _It's too late to ever go back._ The realization hurt. It hurt because no matter how nice of a prison being Kagome's slave was, it was still a prison. He couldn't forget that and it hurt.

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Ohh... lil bit angsty there at the end. Poor Inuyasha... he's always got it so rough. Learning to deal with unwelcome feelings can't be easy, especially when in his experience those feelings can only be used against him. Lets hope that Kagome proves to be the exception to the rule!

I think the title for this chapter is really appropriate - it applies to both Kagome *and* Inuyasha - Kagome in the obvious literal sense, and Inuyasha in the sense that he's so afraid of having his precarious emotional balance shattered. 


	14. Soul Searching

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **Well, the story is coming along, though more slowly now that I've reached the middle chapters. I just started writing the major turning point in the story, which is coming up in about five or six chapters. It's hard, because I want to be realistic about it. I think you guys will like it though, so read on and hopefully enjoy!

I also hope you all had a wonderful holiday, and that everyone is busy recovering for the new year. I had some truly fantastic food - my favorite part of every holiday! It's especially gratifying to eat well since I can't cook and college food is really not as fulfilling as you would hope. ~_^

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 14: Soul Searching. **

Kagome was a little surprised to wake up in her own bed. The events of last night were hazy, but at the same time emotionally draining. It was like a dream that seemed so surreal in the daylight, but lingered in the back of her mind like an old memory or a sudden touch of déjà vu.

She sat up and stretched, noticing that she was still in her clothes from yesterday. Blushing slightly, she realized that Inuyasha must have carried her up to bed. Her heartbeat quickened when she remembered how he'd saved her life. *I didn't even thank him,* she realized with a twinge of conscience. 

Swinging her legs over the edge of the bed, she headed for the shower. Today was Saturday, and she didn't have any classes thank god. Finally she could just relax and sort everything out. She turned on the shower and stepped under the hot spray.

Wincing as she came more awake, Kagome realized that today might not be so enjoyable after all. She definitely had to call her family. They had probably tried to call last night - she hoped Inuyasha hadn't picked up the phone. She had enough to explain to them already - strange men with sexy voices who answered the phone at midnight were not something she wanted to add to her list.

Not ready to go downstairs for breakfast yet, Kagome returned to her bedroom and dressed, sitting down at her desk and picking up the phone. She stared at it for a moment, trying to decide what she would say. Her thoughts remained blank, so with a sigh she punched in her mother's work number, knowing that she would undoubtedly be at her office.

"You've reached the office of Ms. Higurashi - how may I help you?" Her mother's secretary answered on the second ring. "Hi - this is Kagome, can I talk to my mom please?"

"Of course, Kagome!" Let me put you on hold for just a minute while I tell your mother you're on the line."

Kagome waited, twisting the cord around her fingers nervously. A few seconds later her mother was on the line. "Kagome! It's so good to hear from you - how is everything?"

Kagome bit her lip, ashamed at her mother's happy greeting and they way she hadn't immediately brought up the attack or Inuyasha."

"Mom - I'm sorry!" she blurted, tears coming to her eyes. "Everything's so out of control - first Aunt Matilda - and Inuyasha - and now everything that happened last night - Oh, mom I want to come home!"

"Shhhh, Kagome," her mother said soothingly, and Kagome could almost feel her mother stroking her hair comfortingly. "Are you all right? I heard that you had quite a scare last night. Your grandfather and I tried to call you, but we must have called too early because no one answered."

"I'm fine," Kagome said shakily, brushing away tears absently. "Inuyasha stopped them before they could do anything to me, and now they're in jail."

"That's what the police told me. I just wanted to hear that you were okay from your own mouth."

"You - you aren't mad?" Kagome asked hesitantly.

"Why would I be angry?" her mother asked, sounding genuinely confused.

"Because I've been living with Inuyasha practically since I moved in here - I don't know how it happened - I didn't want a slave - "

"Kagome," her mother broke in gently. "You're 18 years old and living on your own now. You're in college you're making your own decisions What you do and don't do, the people you choose to live with - that's out of my hands now."

"But Mom!" Kagome protested, wide eyed.

"I trust your judgment, Kagome," her mother said calmly. "I have every confidence that you'll make the choices that are right for you."

Kagome was silent, choked up and touched and frightened all at the same time. Making her own decisions - not having any rules to follow - suddenly living on her own was taking on a whole new meaning. It was such a huge responsibility. Why hadn't she seen it before? 

"It's so strange," she whispered finally. "I don't know what to do. I still don't want a slave, and it makes me feel terrible to know that I've bought one. I feel like I'm condoning it! I don't know what to do anymore."

"You'll figure it all out," her mother said, and the utter faith her mother had in her made Kagome want to crawl back into bed and bawl. _No I won't!_ she wanted to scream. _I'm not smart and brave and successful like you! I'm just your daughter - just Kagome! I can't make big changes in the world the way you can!_

But all she said was, "I love you mom thanks for being so understanding."

"That's what I'm here for, you know - Oh, and bring this Inuyasha with you next time you come home - I want to meet him and thank him for saving my daughter's life."

Kagome smiled, thinking of the fearless way Inuyasha had faced down Naraku. And her mother's words reminded her that she herself still hadn't thanked the half-demon for protecting her. "I'll bring him, mom. I have to go now - I'll call Grandpa and Sota later on today."

"All right honey - have a good day, and good luck with everything!"

"Thanks mom." Kagome hung up the phone and fidgeted with a pencil that had been lying on her desk for a minute. When had everything gotten so complicated? With a start, she realized that it had always been this complicated - this was just the first time she was stepping out of her bubble and becoming aware of it.

Standing up with renewed determination, Kagome headed for the stairs. Inuyasha was still asleep - with the blankets covering him this time, she noticed, not really sure if the flutter in the pit of her stomach was from relief or disappointment. Glad that she would have some free time before he awoke, she tiptoed to the kitchen and began making breakfast for the two of them as quietly as possible.

Chocolate chip pancakes, she decided. Everyone liked chocolate, after all. And lots of maple syrup and whipped cream to go on top. 

Everything was starting to smell wonderful, and Kagome wasn't surprised to hear Inuyasha stir in the other room. She didn't hear him come to the doorway of the kitchen, but she was prepared for him this morning when he spoke out of nowhere.

"What're you doing?"

"Making pancakes," she replied cheerfully, sprinkling chocolate chips across the batter that was cooking in a liquidy circle on the bottom of her frying pan. She glanced over at him furtively, and was relieved to see that he'd shrugged into a shirt before coming out to see what she was doing. The look of mingled curiosity and hunger on his face made her smile.

He continued to hover in the doorway until he began to make her nervous and she couldn't stand it any longer. "Inuyasha, sit down or something!" she cried, using her spatula to shovel the last batch of the pancakes onto a plate. "I can't concentrate while you're standing there watching me!"

She immediately regretted it as he gave a little start and quickly sat down. "I'm not watching you!" he protested, almost as an afterthought. 

Kagome set the pancakes down on the table next to the maple syrup and turned to face him, her expression contrite. "Sorry," she said, feeling guilty for snapping at him. "I didn't mean that. I'm just - " she broke of and composed herself. "I wanted to thank you," she said finally, forcing herself to hold his golden eyes, which were a touch wary at the moment, but quickly widened at her admission. "For saving my life. I didn't say it before, but - I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't stopped them"

"It's my job to protect you," he snapped, but his tone was more alarmed than annoyed as her eyes started to shimmer with tears.

She was getting emotional again, and she could tell it was making him edgy, so she quickly looked away, forcing a bright smile. "Anyway, I made you my favorite breakfast - we better eat it before it gets cold."

He poked at the pancakes curiously with his fork and watched as she smothered hers with syrup and whipped cream. Digging in with relish, she glared over at him when she realized he was still watching her plate. "You'd better not be hungry after you finish that because you're not getting mine this time!" she told him, pointing her fork at him threateningly.

"Keh!" 

Inuyasha took a tentative bite, and Kagome was happy to see that his breakfast disappeared almost as quickly as his Ramen had after that first taste. 

"I called my mother this morning," she told him at random, pushing a piece of pancake through the syrup on her dish. "She wants to meet you sometime."

"Me?" Inuyasha asked, almost comically surprised. "Why?"

Kagome shrugged. "Because you saved me, I guess," she told him. Finished with her breakfast, she sat back in her chair, not yet ready to stand up and begin clearing the table. She sighed heavily. "I've got so much work to do," she sighed. "I should call Rin about the math problem set. Oh, that reminds me! I'm going back to Rin's house tomorrow night - nothing to do with homework or anything." She saw him tense, and was sorry she had to bring the subject up. "Rin's worried about Kikyo's slave - I think she said his name was Sesshoumaru. And I want to see what he's like - what's wrong, Inuyasha?"

A very odd look had come over Inuyasha's face, and he was staring at her intently. "Did you say Sesshoumaru?"

"Yeah - I think that's what his name is. Rin said he looks a lot like you, actually" Kagome put a finger to her chin, trying to think back on her conversations with Rin and remember what her friend had said about him. A thought occurred to her. "Do you know him, Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha regarded her narrowly for a moment before nodding slowly. Kagome's eyes widened as he said calmly, "He's my older brother."

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I love whipped cream on pancakes! (Whipped cream on Inuyasha would be nice too)

I hope I didn't make Kagome's Mom underreact in this chapter, but based on her character in the anime (and after seeing how calmly she accepted the fact that her daughter was fighting demons in another time period and jumping through a well after school instead of playing sports and whatnot) I think she's in character. But let me know what you think of her character if you disagree - she's not really that important of a role so I haven't been focusing on how to write her too much. 

And in the next chapter we find out a little bit about Inuyasha's past. It's got less angst and more humor and cuddly-ness, so I think you'll like it.


	15. Breaking Through

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **To the reviewer who wanted me to email when I updated - I've tried twice now and both times I get a response saying the address is incorrect - Sorry! It may be me - I've been having some email connection troubles lately since my school server seems to be dying a slow and painful death. 

And as for Celelorien, who has promised me a picture, I am utterly and completely flattered that you would draw me one - I'm in awe of anyone who has artistic talent, as I can barely stay in the lines when I color with my 4 year old cousins. I've seen some unbelievable Inuyasha fan art, and can't wait to see what you've created! Thanks! 

Anyway, I think this chapter is a welcome break from all the seriousness in the past few - not to mention the serious angst that's on the way T_T. Enjoy it while it lasts!

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 15: Breaking Through.**

"Your brother?" Kagome gasped in amazement. "I didn't know you had a brother."

"I thought I didn't," Inuyasha said shortly. "I figured he died a long time ago. He probably thought the same of me."

"That's horrible!" She gazed at him sympathetically. "I'm so sorry."

He looked slightly uncomfortable. "Yeah well. Don't be sorry. He hates me anyway - and I hate him," he was quick to add.

"But why?" Kagome asked, trying to imagine what it would be like to be on bad terms with her own little brother.

Inuyasha shrugged, folding his arms across his chest and looking away from her. "How should I know? He hated my mother for being human, and my father for falling in love with her. Makes sense that he would hate me too."

"He hates you for being a hanyou?" Kagome gasped. "But wait - isn't he one too?"

"He had a different mother. He's a pureblooded demon - any pureblood would hate me for being a half-breed," he told her matter-of-factly.

Kagome looked down, not wanting him to see the pity in her eyes. He'd had such a horrible life - hadn't he had any lucky breaks at all?

"What about your parents?" Kagome asked him quietly. "Could they still be alive somewhere?"

"No. Sesshoumaru's mother died before I was born, forcing him to live with my father. When my parents had me, they broke the law - demons weren't allowed to mate with humans at that time. It's because of that that Sesshoumaru and I were sold into slavery - after our father and my mother were killed. I don't blame him for hating me."

"No!" Kagome didn't know what made her say it, but she couldn't help but try to reach out to him. "Inuyasha, that wasn't your fault!"

He slanted an irritated glance at her. "I never should have happened, Kagome. My parents should never have met each other, never mind - "

"They fell in love!" Kagome protested. "No one can blame them for that - and blaming *you* is insane!"

He shook his head slowly, grimly. "You're wrong. It would have been better if I'd never been born."

Frightened by his stark acceptance of that fact, Kagome didn't even think as she lunged forward, catching both of his hands in hers. "Inuyasha" He was staring into her eyes, startled by the sudden touch. She swallowed hard, trying to fight back the lump in her throat. "I'm glad because if you'd never been born then I never would have met you."

A myriad of emotions flickered through his eyes - confusion, suspicion, disbelief, and finally a kind of hesitant acceptance. "Kagome" he said softly, his fingers tightening on hers, his thumb stroking softly over the sensitive pad of her palm. Her eyes widened slightly - and then they both jumped as the phone rang.

Blushing crazily, Kagome hastily disentangled her hands from his and stood quickly, knocking her leg against the chair behind her as she rushed to pick up the phone. "Hello?" she said, glad that her voice didn't tremble.

"Kagome?" It was Rin. 

"Oh, hi - I was going to call you," Kagome said, feeling herself start to relax. "How are you doing?"

"Oh Kagome!" Rin's voice was high with admiration and awe. "I saw on the news this morning! You were so brave!"

"What?" It took her a moment to catch up with what Rin was talking about. "Oh - that. No, I wasn't brave at all I was scared to death."

"You didn't even faint!" Rin praised her excitedly. "And that guy - Naraku! If I'd realized what a loser he was - "

"I don't really want to think about him," Kagome said quickly. "It's over and I'm okay, and Inuyasha's okay, so I just want to forget about it."

"Inuyasha was really heroic, huh?" Rin observed, her voice slightly envious, but still cheerful. "He took down all four of those guys! And they were armed, too!"

"Yeah," Kagome said softly, feeling warmer suddenly. "He was heroic." She shot a glance at the aforementioned demon and blinked to see that he had cleared off the table completely, and was now watching her with narrowed golden eyes.

Rin was still talking enthusiastically, having let her imagination run away with her as she was so prone to doing. Kagome bit her lip, wondering just *how* good Inuyasha's hearing was. "He's got those sexy golden eyes," Rin gushed happily, "And his ears! Don't you just want to pet them? Not to mention I bet he looks absolutely *delicious* when he's not wearing any clothes - do you think *all* of his hair is silver?"

"Rin!" Kagome cried, suddenly certain that Inuyasha could hear everything her overzealous friend was saying. "Shut up!" For the second time that morning Kagome's face was suffused with a blush, and she couldn't meet the silver-haired boy's eyes. She was too busy trying not to picture every part of Rin's little monologue. 

Rin giggled. "Sorry Kagome. Got a little carried away there. So anyway - " she lowered her voice slightly. "Are we still on for tomorrow night?"

Kagome nodded, glad to be off the previous topic. "Yeah. I'll be there at eight."

"Is Inuyasha coming?"

"I'm not sure - I haven't gotten a chance to ask him yet." She glanced up to meet his eyes, which were distinctly unhappy at the prospect of returning to the house where he'd met Kikyo.

"Of course I'm coming," he snapped when he saw her looking at him. "You'd probably just get into even more trouble if you went by yourself - and besides, I don't trust Sesshoumaru."

"All right, Inuyasha's coming," Kagome told the younger girl. "And - oh! Remember how you said that they looked like they were related?" Rin voiced an affirmative. "Well they are related. They're brothers."

"Brothers?!" Rin cried, and Kagome couldn't stop the small, rueful smile as Inuyasha flinched at the volume of her shriek. 

"Yeah. Isn't that strange?" At that moment Kagome glanced up at the clock on the wall and her eyes widened. "How did it get to be twelve already?" she gasped, looking down at her watch to confirm that it really was noon. "I just woke up! I just ate breakfast a few minutes ago! And all the work I have to do - I'll never finish it all before tomorrow night!"

"Calm down, Kagome!" Rin ordered, obviously suppressing her giggles. "I'm sure you'll be fine - you have almost two whole days to do it all!"

"That's not enough!" Kagome whined. "I haven't even *started* anything the past few days have been so crazy - and I have to catch up on the reading I didn't get a chance to do last week - "

"Sounds like you'd better go. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Yeah," Kagome said distractedly, looking around for where she'd left her backpack. "See you then."

She hung up the phone and rushed past Inuyasha to check the hallway for her books. Not seeing them there, she whirled around to him. "Have you seen my backpack?" she asked desperately.

"Backpack? Yeah, you left it in your car when you went to get that stuff yesterday."

"Oh!" Kagome said, relieved. She took two steps toward the door, then froze. "My car"

Inuyasha smirked. "I was wondering when you'd remember that"

"Oh *no*!" Kagome gasped. Was the world dead set against her passing her first semester of college?

"You weren't really in a good state of mind to be driving," Inuyasha defended himself, seeing her distress and secretly terrified of seeing her start to cry again.

Kagome didn't cry, but she did whimper as she leaned her head against the door in despair. "Now what am I going to do?" she whined. "I need that bag and it'll take hours to walk all the way to school!"

Inuyasha sighed and moved forward. "I'll take you back."

She blinked up at him. "You'll take me? How?"

"How do you think?" he growled at her sarcastically. "The same way I brought you home last night."

She paused uncertainly, but realized that if she wanted her bag she really didn't have much of a choice. And she'd kind of enjoyed being carried home last night - not to mention being so close to him - 

She felt her face getting hot, and was glad that he was facing away so that she could climb onto his back. Carefully, she brushed his hair out of the way so she wouldn't pull it, trying desperately not to think too hard about Rin's comment about his natural hair color. He gave her more time to get used to the position than he had last night, waiting until her arms were secure around his neck before standing up and reaching for the door.

"You're not scared, are you?"

"Of course not," she denied as he stepped outside and shut the door behind them.

"Your heart is pounding," he argued, winding his arms around her thighs and consequently bringing her body closer to his. Kagome didn't answer. There was no way he was ever finding out that her reaction was quite the opposite of fear. 

Then the wind was whistling through her hair as Inuyasha took off with a bounding leap that carried them well above the treetops surrounding her home. Kagome gasped in delight and surprise, forgetting to be self-conscious as she tightened her grip on him and leaned forward slightly to keep from getting a face-full of his hair.

She was quiet, just watching and enjoying the roller-coaster exhilleration of traveling this way. Strangely, the feeling of trust in his strength and judgment had carried over to this morning - Kagome wasn't afraid of falling in the least.  


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Awww. Now the relationship is getting somewhere - building trust on top of the powerful chemestry that's always between the two of them no matter how they try to deny it! 


	16. Brotherly Love

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **So here it comes, the beginning of the first of two story arcs. This is setting up for the culmination of all the stuff I've been trying to build up in other chapters, and this "first" part of the story ends in chapter 18, setting the stage for the next arc to begin to be created. So in my mind this is a 2 part story, though I'm not really distinguishing it that way other than right here. 

Sesshoumaru is hard to write here because he's being subservient, and I don't like writing him that way! So I guess I better get cracking on this story and get to the good parts, huh? Wish me luck!

Happy New Year everyone! Enjoy the next chapter! I'll be trying to write some more as I sit here recovering from my massive hangover.... ~_^

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 16: Brotherly Love.**

Although Inuyasha's way of traveling saved her some time, she was still rushed. She locked herself in her study as soon as she got home and didn't come out for hours. She didn't even realize what time it was until Inuyasha knocked loudly on the door of the study.

"Hey! Aren't you going to eat something?" 

"Not hungry!" Kagome called back, turning the page of her math book. She was making good progress, but there was still a lot she wanted to get done before Monday. 

She glanced up at the clock and sighed. Eleven thirty. At least she was caught up on all the work she'd missed during the past week, though. Stifling a yawn she went back to her math homework.

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Morning found her face down in her textbook, a pencil still clutched loosely in her hand.

"Mmmph" she said, lifting her stiff neck with a groan. She blinked owlishly at the sunrise, seeing that it was already about 9am. How late was I up last night? She wondered, standing and stretching carefully as her muscles protested.

Shower, she thought, in somewhat of a daze. I'll feel better after a shower. The hot water helped relax her knotted muscles, and she paused only to snag a quick breakfast downstairs before returning to her study. 

The words seemed to blur before her eyes as she struggled to keep focused, to keep awake. Finally she shut her book with a sigh. "I guess that's good enough. Now I just have to read for sociology." 

She rummaged around in her bag for the book, but didn't find it. She frowned vaguely before remembering that she'd left it beside her bed since she didn't have sociology on Fridays.

When she entered her room though, all she could look at was her bed. I'll just lie down for a minute," she thought hazily, crawling in under the covers fully clothed.

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Kagome's eyes flickered open slowly. It was dark in her room. Was it morning yet? All coherent thoughts were pushed from her head as her eyes adjusted and she became aware of two large golden eyes staring at her.

Kagome screamed, bolting upright in bed and nearly falling off the other side in her haste to get the lights on.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Inuyasha growled, standing quickly from his crouch, ears flattened against her head as her shriek echoed painfully in his sensitive eardrums.

"I - I - what are you *doing* here?" she demanded, relieved and a little angry at how he'd scared her.

His eyes darkened. "It's 8:30. Didn't you tell your friend you would be at her house by eight?"

Kagome gasped. "Why didn't you wake me up sooner?" she yelled at him, forgetting that just a moment ago she'd been furious with him for entering her room uninvited. He appeared just as confused by her sudden change of heart, covering it with a glare. She bolted from the room, grabbing her keys on the way out. "Come on!" she called back to him. "Rin's going to *kill* me!"

In typical Bostonian fashion she broke every law of the road on the way into Cambridge. Still, it was 9:00 when she rang the doorbell of the house. Inuyasha was hanging back, scowling, and Kagome knew he was still wary of the house after what had happened last time they'd been here, and maybe still upset by the abrupt way she'd acted toward him at the house. She sighed - later on she'd make it up to him somehow. She was too nervous right now.

Rin opened the door for them, looking a little concerned. "I thought you weren't coming," she said.

"I fell asleep," Kagome admitted sheepishly. "If Inuyasha hadn't woken me up when he did I probably *would* have missed it completely. Is there still time to see him?"

"Yeah," Rin confirmed, smiling and letting them by her into the house. "I was just about to take him dinner."

"You feed him?" Kagome asked, curiously. Wasn't it supposed to be the other way around?

Rin flushed guiltily, leading them into the kitchen. "Sometimes Kikyo forgets to do it. Or doesn't feed him on purpose. So I do it." She picked up a tray of food and moved toward a closed doorway. "He doesn't know you're coming - I didn't have a chance to tell him." She glanced back at Inuyasha uncertainly. "Maybe you should stay outside for a minute - so we can break it to him slowly."

Inuyasha shrugged. "Whatever."

Kagome blinked, a little confused by his sullen reaction, but nodded determinedly. "Lets go in.

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The room was dim, and Kagome waited for her eyes to adjust as Rin moved forward. "Sesshoumaru?" she called softly.

There was the sound of fabric brushing against the wall, someone on the fringes of the room standing up, and then light flooded the air so suddenly that Kagome flinched back. When her dazzled eyes could see again, she looked over toward the source of the light.

And froze. God he's tall, she thought dazedly, staring unabashedly at his imposing figure. His relation to Inuyasha was clear - the long, silken white hair, the piercing golden eyes. The features were more refined however, chiseled as if he were made of fine marble, and two red stripes ran parallel from his cheekbones and disappeared into his hair on either side of his face. He was beautiful - almost effeminately so. And yet there was an indefinable masculine quality about him that made it impossible for him to be mistaken for anything but a Yokai male. Kagome noticed that strapped to his waist was a sword similar to the one Inuyasha carried - further evidence that they were related.

The golden eyes flickered to her, and she stared, entranced. Perhaps he wasn't carven of marble at all, but rather ice - for his expression, his emotions, were so closely guarded that it was as if a mask rested over his face.

"This is Kagome," Rin said quickly, her voice pitched to be soothing. "She's my friend from school, and she wanted to meet you."

Those amazing eyes, so different from Inuyasha's expressive intensity, assessed her for another moment before he inclined his head slightly and knelt gracefully to repeat the gesture of servitude that Inuyasha had shown Rin the other day.

"Don't!" Kagome cried, freezing him in place. "Please," she added in a more moderated tone. "There's no need for that."

Rin shook her head. "Kagome's crazy," she told Sesshoumaru in an amused tone. "She doesn't believe in treating slaves as lesser beings. Oh! I brought you dinner." She stepped forward with the tray, her eyes fixed on his face as if she were afraid he would reject what she offered him.

But he took the tray calmly and set it to the side. "Thank you."

His voice was deep, without inflection. The same flawless control, the icy lack of expression that Kagome had noted in his eyes showed through in his voice as well, and she bit her lip. 

"You brought someone else with you," Sesshoumaru said to her, and Kagome's eyebrows went up. She noticed Rin's startled little jolt and wondered if this was the first time Sesshoumaru had spoken to a stranger - or spoken to anyone, for that matter - without permission. If that was true, it was interesting that he'd chosen her - perhaps he was able to read her well enough to understand that she wasn't one for tradition.

Kagome nodded. "My friend - my slave. I don't know how you're going to react - You know him." Sesshoumaru didn't move or break his steady gaze on her face. She took a calming breath. "Your brother."

There was no response, and Kagome had the feeling that more was going on behind those eyes than she could ever hope to comprehend. Then his eyes narrowed, flicking to a point behind her. "Inuyasha. You're alive after all."

Kagome turned and saw Inuyasha leaning casually in the doorway, his expression defensive and his body language defiant. "Sorry to disappoint," the hanyou said, a trace of satisfaction in his voice.

Sesshoumaru looked back to Kagome. "You allow him to dress above his station?"

Kagome nodded. "I didn't really want a slave - it was sort of an accident." She waited anxiously for another moment. "Aren't you two happy to see each other at all?"

"I told you," Inuyasha muttered resentfully.

Wide eyed, she turned her disbelieving gaze on his older brother. "Do you really hate him?" she asked in amazement.

"He should not exist," Sesshoumaru said unflinchingly, unyieldingly. "He was the cause of my father's death, as well as my slavery."

Inuyasha bristled, his eyes flashing dark gold in fury. "He was *my* father too, you asshole!"

Before Sesshoumaru could respond there was a thundering crash from somewhere above them, followed by a piercing shriek that made Kagome gasp.

"That pervert!" Rin cried, clenching her fists. "What's he doing now?"

"Miroku's here?" Kagome queried. "Oh right, he said he was living with you."

There was another shattering crash and a string of curses. Rin glowered at the ceiling. "I'm going to *kill* him! Kagome, will you help me get rid of whatever girl he's trapped up there *this* time?"

Kagome frowned, disgusted by Miroku's antics. Couldn't he keep his hormones under control? "All right," she agreed, before remembering the volatile situation in the room.

She glanced worriedly at Inuyasha, who was still giving his older brother a death glare and clenching his fists in a way that made Kagome worry that his own claws would hurt him. "Inuyasha, will you be okay if I run upstairs for a minute?" she asked. He gave her a noncommittal glance.

"No fighting!" Rin ordered, frowning in an echo of Kagome's worry. "None. We'll be back as soon as possible."

Another worrisome crash had the two girls running for the stairs.  


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Next chapter is my longest yet cuz it's really important and I don't want to break it into parts. So stay tuned for "Face Your Fears", coming soon!


	17. Face Your Fears

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **Here it is, the first apex of the story. Where all the characters have to face up to something - even Miroku! But he gets smacked around every day so it's really nothing new for him. Anyway, I really hope this chapter came out as good as I wanted it to. No, Sango is *not* the girl in the first part of this chapter, but she will be coming in soon. Stay tuned!

For reference purposes - I know Sesshoumaru's sword can't kill, but I'm overlooking that fact in my story. His sword is just as deadly as any other sword here. Also, Kikyo makes reference to the 'hive' in this chapter. That's what Inuyasha described to Kagome in an earlier chapter (I think 'Snapping Out of It') - the slaves who have chips put in their brains and become mindless extentions of the government, used to hunt down renegade slaves. In the minds of the other slaves, this is a fate worse than death because it strips them of their very self. It's a deep violation of a person's very being, and it disgusts Inuyasha probably more than anything else, since he's dead set on retaining his own mind and thoughts no matter what happens to him. He doesn't really have any hopes of escaping being a slave or becoming free, because he's a realist and there's just not a chance of that happening in his mind - not to mention the fact there's no historical precident either. No slaves have ever escaped or been freed. Inuyasha's main driving force is his determination not to break. So yeah, now that I've gone on about that for way too long and bored you all, you can actually read the fic and see what the hell I'm on about. ~_^

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 17: Face Your Fears.**

"Miroku!" Kagome and Rin cried in unison as they burst through the bedroom door. Once inside, they stopped, amazed at the situation. A young blond-haired woman in a slinky dress was holding a lamp over Miroku's prone form, ready to bring it crashing down on his head. He himself was looking a bit dazed, his eyes swirling with confusion and not a bit of pain.

Around the room, various other pieces of furniture had been smashed, leaving chunks of wood and glass littering the carpet and the bed. 

Rin stepped forward. "Miroku! What did you do to this poor girl?!"

"M-Me?" he stammered out. "Why do I get blamed for everything? She's trying to kill me!"

"You probably deserve it!" Kagome chimed reproachfully, giving the girl a conciliatory glance. "Are you all right?"

The girl took several calming breaths and put down the lamp. "Don't ever call me again!" she shouted at Miroku, stepping on him as she stalked out of the room calling "Lech!" over her shoulder in tones of disgust.

Rin was still glowering, but Kagome sighed and reached down to help Miroku up to sit on the edge of the bed. "Are you mortally wounded?" she asked flatly.

"I don't think so, Kagome-sama, but thank you for your - "

"Save it!" Kagome snapped. "You have some serious issues! And get that woe-is-me look off your face! No one's going to sympathize with you!"

He sighed, his shoulders slumping. "Yes, Kagome-sama."

"Now," Rin said imperiously. "Explain to us exactly what happened."

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Inuyasha was having extreme déjà vu. It was exactly like the last time Kagome had left him - it was as though that bitch had just been waiting for her chance. No sooner had the girls disappeared upstairs when Kikyo stepped into the room with a smile of feline satisfaction.

The standoff between the two brothers now had another member.

"Sesshoumaru."

"Yes, Kikyo-sama." Sesshoumaru's voice was a flat monotone, and his menace had faded to blank nothingness at her entrance. 

"Who is the slave in front of you?" Kikyo asked, smiling at Inuyasha the way a cat might smile at a mouse caught in a trap.

"My brother. Inuyasha."

"And why is he dressed in the clothes of a civilian rather than those appropriate for a vile miscreant?" She continued, sashaying closer to him, not taking her eyes off him.

Inuyasha started to panic again. _He_ was the mouse - he was trapped. This was very, very bad.

Sesshoumaru answered her without hesitation. "Because his master does not treat him as a slave should be treated, Kikyo-sama."

"Hmmm. Very good, Sesshoumaru. I think we need to give him a lesson in proper behavior, don't you?" She didn't wait for him to answer. "Take of your clothes, slave."

Inuyasha's instincts screamed at him to obey. To let go of his consciousness has he had before, to retreat and leave the situation behind. To do otherwise would be insanity, idiocy, sheer lunacy. To do otherwise could mean death. It would go against hundreds of years of tradition, violate dozens of codes of conduct. He was trapped.

But Kagome. Kagome, who didn't want him to revert ever again. Kagome, who had treated him as an equal, told him that slavery was wrong, encouraged him not to take orders. Kagome, who had called him her friend.

"Hurry up, slave," Kikyo purred. "Or I might make your punishment last longer."

His muscles were locked, his body battling itself. He didn't have a choice. He had to do as she said. There was nothing that could change that fact, nothing that he could fall back on. He had nothing was nothing.

Except maybe himself.

Inuyasha's eyes narrowed, and the hands that had risen as though to unbutton his shirt fell back to his sides. "No," he said, clearly and precisely.

Kikyo's eyes widened almost comically. "What did you just say to me?" It was beyond her to comprehend that word coming from a slave's mouth. She couldn't even register the affront because until now it had been laughable to think that a slave - a _slave_ - would dare to disobey anyone.

Inuyasha smirked, no longer caring what she did to him. Saying that one simple word had somehow changed everything. The trapped feeling had fled in the wake of triumph, and Inuyasha was beginning to understand that all that separated him from _them_, from the higher race of beings that slaves could never touch, never dream to become, the only barrier that stood in his way was that one word. And he had just said it. Adrenaline was pumping through his veins, a heady elixir that made him feel invincible, drunk on his own power. 

He couldn't stop now and he didn't want to. "I said no, bitch," he taunted her, meeting her eyes directly. "So fuck off."

They locked in a battle of wills for a long moment, Kikyo's sneer of fury becoming more and more pronounced. And then, abruptly, she stepped back, her expression smoothing over.

For a wild, exhilarating instant, Inuyasha thought he'd won.

"Sesshoumaru."

"Yes, master."

"Teach him a lesson."

As if he'd been waiting for the order, Sesshoumaru drew his sword in a blur of motion, thrusting it toward Inuyasha's chest. Instinct saved him, and in a blinding flash his own sword was drawn, parrying Sesshoumaru's blow in a flare of silver.

For a long moment the two brothers struggled for dominance. Sesshoumaru's eyes were full of cold disdain. Kagome had been wrong - all Sesshoumaru felt toward him was disgust.

"You'll die here," Sesshoumaru said, too softly for Kikyo to hear, his upper lip curling. "You'll die, and when you do you'll still be a slave. You'll have proven nothing, changed nothing. Your impulsiveness, your lack of control - they will be your ruin, Inuyasha. You haven't grown up in the least. But what could I expect from my half-breed, inferior kin?"

"Don't be so sure," Inuyasha hissed, fury whiting out his vision as he focused on his sole purpose - killing Sesshoumaru. His brother had always been stronger in their youth, but Inuyasha had grown into his own strength since then. "I'm not that easy to kill anymore!"

And with that, Inuyasha exerted all his strength upward in a move that sent Sesshoumaru crashing backward into the table Rin had placed the food on, sending the tray flying. Immediately, he dove forward in an offensive swing that Sesshoumaru barely blocked. Once on the offensive he was unstoppable, a whirlwind of silver hair and silver sword, driving Sesshoumaru back inch by inch. Before tonight he didn't know who would have won the fight - Sesshoumaru was a formidable opponent and they might have been evenly matched. But Inuyasha had something to fight for now. He could taste his brother's astonishment could taste his defeat.

"Inuyasha!" Kikyo's voice cut through the battle. "If you win this fight you lose everything else. Kagome can't protect you from being reassigned to work in a mine for the rest of your life. She can't keep them from making you one of the hive."

Inuyasha froze as her words pierced him. He hovered above his brother, feeling despair stealing his elated, empowered haze. His euphoria was crashing down around him, a fantasy castle that had never existed in the first place. Suddenly he was powerless again. He could kill his brother - he could kill Kikyo. But in the end it would change nothing. He was caged, as always, with the familiar, bitter taste of his imprisonment heavy on his tongue. He had no choices left. 

There's always a choice! His mind screamed at him. Slowly, deliberately, he straightened from his battle crouch, sheathing his sword in one smooth motion. He could choose to look his brother in the eye as he faced him. He could choose not to scream. 

It wasn't the same kind of empowerment he'd felt a moment ago. Not the magic of rage and anger and defiance, not the glory of physical prowess and destruction. Something else - calmer, stronger, more enduring. A power that came from within. The flame that still burned when everything else was lost. 

It wasn't fighting for a cause and it wasn't facing danger. It wasn't putting something above oneself. It went beyond strength, beyond intellegence, beyond reflex and intuition and instinct. It was fighting when you knew had no hope left, standing up when you had no defenses, speaking when your voice had been broken.

You can't break me, he thought, channeling his anger into superhuman strength. You can't even touch me. Golden eyes met golden, and for the barest instant Inuyasha thought he saw something alien in the icy, inhuman gaze. Something like respect.  


And then he felt the tearing agony that was Sesshoumaru's blade stabbing through his chest.

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Kagome ran down the stairs, a desperate, burning feeling in her chest. Kikyo's car in the driveway. Rin's wide-eyed look of horror. Inuyasha - oh God, she'd left him again. How could she have done it? How could she have forgotten the danger?

She didn't even dare to breathe as she bolted through the living room, across the tiled kitchen floor. 

Please, she thought as she turned the doorknob and the wood panel swung open before her. Please let him be all right.

She froze in the doorway, eyes wide in horror. Kikyo looked up at her and smiled. "Kagome. You're just in time to witness the punishment a slave merits when he dresses above his station."

Inuyasha stood in the center of the room, his face set with fury and determination. Blood dripped off him, pooling on the floor around him. Kagome nearly panicked - was he losing too much blood? Was she going to lose him? The thought was like a stabbing pain in her own abdomen though he was the one who had a physical wound there.

In front of him stood Sesshoumaru, holding a sword that was covered in Inuyasha's blood. It was poised to be driven back into him at Kikyo's command.

"Don't you dare!" Kagome cried, taking a desperate step forward. "He was doing what I told him to do, so if anyone should be punished it's me!"

Kikyo shook her head. "So pathetic so naïve. You're a fool, Kagome Higurashi. Your family may be powerful, but you yourself are nothing more than a little girl. You can't stand against me and you know it." The older girl looked away, back to the two brothers, dismissing Kagome as no threat. "Again, Sesshoumaru."

Kagome didn't stop to think. "No!" She flung herself forward, her only concern intercepting that swing before it hit Inuyasha. She had promised herself she wouldn't let anyone else hurt him, and she'd already broken her word to an unacceptable degree.

Sesshoumaru jerked the sword to the side as soon as he realized her intention, but it still grazed her collarbone and the resulting gash began to bleed immediately.

Kagome stood between the two brothers, her breath coming in quick, short gasps, her huge smoky blue eyes trained intently on Sesshoumaru's impassive face. "I forgive you," she said in a rush, holding his gaze. "I forgive you for hurting him. You didn't have a choice."

"For hurting *me*?" Inuyasha shouted, his voice rising in an enraged crescendo. "You bastard! I'll kill you for laying a goddamn *finger* on her!"

He lunged forward, his determination to kill his brother returning tenfold despite his injuries. Kagome spun, holding him back. "Inuyasha, stop it! You're hurt!"

The fury redirected at her. "What the hell were you thinking, you idiot?" he shouted, grabbing her by the shoulders. "You could have been killed! Do you hear me, Kagome? He could have _killed_ you!"

Before she could recover and reply, Kagome was suddenly jerked away from Inuyasha by a painful grip on her arm. She found herself face-to-face with Kikyo, who was looking more discomposed than Kagome had ever seen her. They locked gazes for a moment before Kikyo released her bruising grip on the smaller girl's arm.

"It seems we're at an impasse, Higurashi," She said, her voice low and little more than an angry hiss. "Take your slave and go. In return for my mercy, you will speak of your injury to no one."

It penetrated Kagome's overloaded brain that she could have Sesshoumaru executed and Kikyo fined and put on probation for the injury that she'd received. Slowly she relaxed. "Never touch him again, Kikyo," she said, her voice holding only the slightest tremor. "If you do, I'll make you sorry."

Kikyo's eyes narrowed to slits. "Don't presume to threaten me, little girl. It's pure luck that he's walking out of here alive after his little show of defiance earlier." She thrust Kagome back, and she stumbled. "Now get out of my sight." Kikyo turned and swept out of the room, and Sesshoumaru fell into step behind her. Neither of them looked back.  


  
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How'd I do?!? 

And once again, the girl in the beginning was *not* Sango. Sango will be introduced later in the story. Also, I'm moving back into school tomorrow and starting a rather intense schedule of classes and work on Monday, so I'm not sure how the updating will go from here on. But be nice to me - I could have ended it right after Sesshoumaru stabbed Inuyasha!


	18. Reality Check

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **So here's the followup to my big action/drama chapter. Might not be exactly what you expected or what you hoped for, but put your faith in me and I will try my damndest to deliver eventually!

I've gotten so many great reviews, especially to the last chapter, that I just couldn't help but respond to individuals. This may or may not become a habitual practice - Probably not because I feel guilty that I can't respond to everyone. But here are the review responses I couldn't help but write - if you have time to read them it might be beneficial because there's a lot of answers to questions and explinations in them - as well as a few possible hints about things to come! Also - _if you didn't get a response and want one, or if you review in the future and really want a response, you can email me and I'll definitely get back to you, though I can't promise it'll be the same day. ^_^_

**Response to Reviews:**

**LinaNverse** - Yep, started school the 6th - I go to school near Boston @ Wellesley, and spring semester doesn't start till the beginning of February, but we have a wintersession where they offer some random stuff that's mostly for fun, and you get to live on campus with all your friends and pretty much just chill away from home (I love my family, but I love being on my own more!) - and best of all it's free. (Or as free as anything in college is, which is not free at all. =P) 

**LinaNverse, zee-donk & Chri** - Kikyo comes from a pretty powerful family, and because of that feels a competitive edge with Kagome. She's a little jealous of Kagome's family history, which in her eyes is better than hers, although that may or may not be true in reality. She also resents Kagome and her family for having the money for slaves and yet not owning them - she's a little afraid of a new precident being set that will cause herself and her family to be looked down on for owning slaves, and a little afraid of Kagome's desire to free slaves. And maybe deep deep DEEP down, she knows that slavery and her attitude toward slaves is wrong, so she acts in a way that reinforces her belief system and talks as though Kagome and those who agree with her are naïve/crazy/ridiculous. In truth, she could probably follow through on her threats to make Kagome miserable - most likely by using Inuyasha against her (ie. Turning her in for her abnormal treatment of him (letting him do whatever he wants, etc.)). The law would probably take Kikyo's side - EXCEPT that after Sesshoumaru inadvertently hurt Kagome, they're both sort of stuck - they both have leverage against the other so they're keeping quiet. (Of course, Kagome would never go to court over what happened with Sesshoumaru because she doesn't think he deserves to be punished, but Kikyo doesn't know that, and even if she suspects it she won't take that chance.)

If Kikyo had killed Inuyasha she wouldn't have been in trouble. She doesn't have the right to randomly kill slaves, but she had the right to object to him wearing clothes that were above slaves, and after he told her to fuck off it was all over. If anyone found out that he said that he'd be in MAJOR trouble - most likely made a part of the hive (the computer chip slaves) since he's too valuable to just kill. But killing him was within her power after he rebelled like that - slaves with ambition, ideas, and spirit in general are dangerous and it's illegal to allow a slave to act out against anyone.

**Saiera** - I laughed out loud when I read your review! Sorry, no tripping and falling, but try not to worry - leave Kikyo to me. *cackle* Though I have to warn you guys, I don't hate Kikyo, and I don't believe that anyone is truly and completely evil. But you'll see what I have in store for her eventually. (_Side note:_ Someone commented a while ago about how Kikyo was really kind and compassionate while she was alive, and I know that's true, but the only real experience of her character I get is the angry, cold, cheated side, and so that's how I'm writing her.)

**Rei Woo** - About Kagome's eyes yes, I realized that she had brown eyes eventually (I'm not very observant ~_^) but it was already too late - I've read blue in a few other stories so I guess it was in my head while I was writing. Thanks for the clarification, and sorry for the inaccuracy!

**ArtemisMoon** - Thank you! Your review really means a lot since I read and adored and worshiped your story 'Easy as 1, 2, 3'. You're a fantastic writer and I hope you find the time and inspiration to write something else at a point in the future!

**Shahrezad1** - wow when you put it that way it really does sound complex! But I think what it comes down to is Kagome encouraging Inuyasha to think outside the box, and his subsequent realization that he *can* give meaning to his life, and that no matter what people do to him or take away from him, he always has himself to fall back on. It was a major self-confidence and maturity boost for him, and he suddenly found meaning in a life that was previously spinning out of his control. Now if he can only get a chance to act on it

**Mara-chan** - Thanks for your amazing review! I'm really flattered that you like it so much - I had no idea I would get such a positive response posting my story here. I definitely know where this story is going and have most of it planned out, but I do consider reviews carefully - they're especially helpful because I can see what people are confused about and clarify either in the story, or in the notes. Thanks again, you're wonderful!

**Animelover** - You'll just have to wait and see about Rin and our favorite demon lord!

**Ryuko** - I'm honored that you took the time to review my story! ^_^ I'm glad you think everyone is in character, I tried really hard to get them right. Hope you continue to read and enjoy!

**Imoen** - Thanks for being such a faithful reviewer, and once again, congrats on your lovely story! It's progressing really well - I was so happy when Inuyasha was pronounced free - and of course when Houjou got his ass kicked. ~_^ Can't wait to read more!

**Bunni Girl** - First, thank you for your review - it's one of my favorites! I'm glad you like the story so far and that you agree with my plot development decisions. As for your questions - Many people have complained both about the length of the chapters and about their infrequency. I completely understand and sympathize with where you guys are coming from as I'm in your shoes as well as an avid fanfic reader in several genres. Unfortunately this is the best I can do without detracting from my real life responsibilities. Hope you continue to enjoy the fic despite all that!

**Julia-Tears **- You made some really great points I'd like to address. First of all, the issue of Kagome's "order" not to take orders. This was made in only semi-seriousness, and Inuyasha knows that it doesn't really apply in the real world because Kagome can't give him an order that forces him to break laws or codes of conduct for slaves. That kinda goes against the idea that slaves have to obey their masters no matter what, but it makes sense if you think about it - if Kagome ordered Inuyasha to fly, he just couldn't do it - it's not within his power. Same with not obeying orders anymore... it's outside his control because he'd get punished for it even though he was ordered to do it. That brings me to your next point which is that shouldn't **masters **decide on punishments for their slaves and screw everyone who disagrees with their decisions? The answer is yes and no - Yes, if the decisions don't break laws. But if the decisions do break laws - like a slave not taking orders anymore - then outside influences step in. Allowing a slave to dress normally isn't _specifically_ against the law, but it sets a dangerous precident for other slaves and can give them ideas. Kikyo would have brought up that point in court, and the law would have ruled in her favor. So the whole situation is really complex and is pretty much screwing over Kagome and Inuyasha at every turn. 

**Everyone else: **You are all amazing, wonderful, inspiring people, and I am truly and deeply regretful that there are not enough hours in the day for me to respond to each and every one of you and give you the attention you deserve for being such faithful readers who are so generous with praise and constructive criticism. Enjoy the story!

  


**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 18: Reality Check.**

"Hurry up," Kagome urged Inuyasha, hovering next to him as he made his way up the stairs to her house. She just wanted to get him inside and make sure he was going to be okay. The bleeding seemed to have stopped, but the wide hole in his shirt was making her sick to her stomach, and the dried blood covering him wasn't helping. 

Finally getting him into her living room, she led him toward the couch. He resisted. "I'm going to get blood all over everything."

Kagome gave him an incredulous glance. "How can you think I'd care about something like that? Just sit down and take off your shirt so I can make sure you're okay!"

He glared down at her. "I'm fine! You can just go to bed or study or something, because this is no big deal."

Kagome clenched her fists. "It is a big deal! Inuyasha, there's a gaping hole in your chest! Don't pretend it's not hurting you!"

"This is nothing compared to what I used to get during a battle back at the academy! At least I didn't revert!" He paused as Kagome reached determinedly for the buttons on his shirt. "What the hell are you doing?"

"I'm taking off your shirt. Unless you're going to cooperate and do it yourself, in which case I'll go get the first aid kit in the kitchen."

The bold move affected Inuyasha more than he'd like to admit. The hole in his chest put a damper on any of his usual responses to such a statement, but he couldn't help but consider other situations where she might undress him. He caught her hands and pulled them away. "I'll do it," he snarled, wanting to put distance between them.

She paused, then nodded, turning and heading for the other room. He sighed in relief and ran a hand through his hair. What a fucking mess.

With an annoyed growl, he finished unbuttoning where Kagome had left off and peeled the blood-soaked garment away from his skin, wincing as clotted blood was pulled free of his wound. Sesshoumaru really was a bastard.

He balled up the shirt and tossed it into the nearby waste basket, crossing his arms over his chest. A moment later, Kagome reentered carrying a box full of medical supplies. 

She stopped short in shock at the sight of him, her eyes fixed on the bloody tear in the center of his chest, which was liberally smeared with his blood. He glared at her. "What?" 

She jumped at his defensive snarl, her eyes flicking to his face, full of concern. "I should take you to the hospital - how can you still be standing with a wound like that?"

Inuyasha resisted the urge to roll his eyes. The pain had faded to an aching throb rather than the sharp, piercing stab he'd been experiencing before. He could already feel his body knitting itself back together and he was willing to bet there wouldn't even be a scar left by morning. "No hospital. If you let me wash the blood off I can go to sleep and - "

"Isn't it bad for you to get wet?" Kagome argued. "What if you collapse in the shower?"

This time he couldn't help rolling his eyes. "I'm not going to collapse, damn it! What kind of pathetic excuse for a demon do you think I am?"

She flinched back slightly, and he abruptly regretted being so rough. "Will you at least let me put a bandage on after you get out of the shower?" she asked hopefully.

He sighed. He just wanted to be left alone. "Fine," he snapped, heading toward the bathroom. The warm water soothed his tense muscles, and he leaned his hands against the tiled wall, letting the blood wash off his body. He was reluctant to go back out and face Kagome, but he forced himself to put on a clean pair of pants and return to the living room where she was sitting quietly on the couch, frowning, lost in her own thoughts.

She looked up as he entered, fingers tightening on the bandage in her lap. She gave him a weak smile. "It doesn't look so bad now that it's clean," she offered uncertainly.

"Keh." He settled himself on the floor in front of her, his expression set. "Just get this over with."

Her fingers were gentle and tentative as she began to bind up the wound, wrapping strips of gauze around it firmly but carefully. He felt warmth spread wherever her fingertips grazed his skin, and involuntarily began to relax. "I'm sorry," she whispered as she finished wrapping the gauze around his chest and secured it with a pin.

He snorted incredulously. "For what?"

"I left you alone - again - I should have known better after last time - " 

At the salty scent of her tears, Inuyasha turned to face her in disbelief. She sniffed, wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand. "Why are you crying?" he asked, completely confused. "I didn't think Sesshoumaru hurt you badly." He reached out to brush her hair away from the side of her neck to see if he'd misjudged the severity of her wound.

She shook her head angrily, catching his hand to keep him from touching her. "I'm not crying because I'm hurt, you jerk! I don't care about that. I'm crying because *you* were hurt!"

He blinked, too astonished to respond as she continued to cry quietly, refusing to meet his eyes. "You're crying for me?" he echoed quietly, not pulling his wrist from her grip. It was too strange of a concept to really grasp.

She looked up to meet his eyes, anguish shining through in her smoky gaze. "What if I hadn't gotten there in time? What if she'd killed you, Inuyasha?"

He frowned. "You would have cared if I died?" He had never really thought about it. He'd always assumed he would go out of the world silently, unknown and unmissed. The thought that she would have cried, the way she was crying now, was a bitter-sweet warmth in his chest. He didn't want her to cry, but it was consoling to know that he was worth so much in her eyes.

He blinked in surprise as she lifted her head to glare at him furiously even though she was still crying. "How can you say that?" she shrieked at him, and he had to flatten his ears to his head to protect them from the volume of it. Now what had he done?

She dropped his hand and clenched her fists, trembling with rage and the aftershock of fear. "Of course I would have cared," she hissed at him. "How could you think I wouldn't?"

He glared back defensively. "You have no right to talk like that!" he shouted back at her. "I've lived alone until now. No one's ever cared before, so don't complain about it!"

She reached out to him involuntarily, unable to resist the raw bitterness in his tone. In that moment she wanted nothing more than to take away all of his pain, to replace the tragedy he'd endured with something warmer, happier.

He froze under her touch, and Kagome hastened to reassure him further, slipping off the couch to her knees and wrapping her arms around him. She was careful of the bandages on his chest, making sure not to put pressure on the wound as she buried her face in his shoulder and held his tense, resisting body.

It took a long moment for him to relax, and he slowly began to respond to the embrace. She sighed as she felt his arms come up around her, pull her closer. He was warm, and she could feel the strength that radiated off him.

After a moment she lifted her head to look up at him, her heart beating faster as she realized how close their faces were. His eyes were a clear, warm gold and she could see the uncertainty behind his usually impenetrable defenses. "What'd you do to make Kikyo so mad, anyway?" she asked him, partly to diffuse the building tension between them.

To her surprise, he grinned dangerously at the memory. "I told her to fuck off."

Kagome's eyes widened, and she choked on her laughter. "No wonder she wanted to kill you. I wish I could have seen it."

They stared at each other some more and Kagome's smile faded. When she spoke next it was in a hushed whisper. "It's my fault all of this happened. I made you dress that way - You tried to tell me but I wouldn't listen, and if anyone else finds out then you'll be in even more trouble - "

He shook his head. "You didn't know."

"I should have listened to you!"

"You still wouldn't have done anything differently, so don't bother trying to use that as an excuse. You live in your own reality, Kagome. You felt guilty about owning me - you wanted to justify it somehow by not treating me like a possession so you ignored the real world and everything horrible that happens there. You created what you wanted to see."

She blinked in amazement. He was right; she'd been trying to assuage her own feelings of guilt by realizing her ideal through Inuyasha. She'd been stringing him along with a false projection of a dream that could never be. But now defeat and helplessness were making her weaker, sapping her energy and her determination. Seeing clearly for the first time in her life, she felt tears fill her eyes again. She couldn't change the fact that he was a slave. She couldn't change society to fit her own beliefs.

"I was stupid," she whispered. "I wouldn't listen. I wouldn't accept the truth."

They were still looking at each other, but something had changed now. Reality, perhaps - the illusions she'd created crashing down around their ears. The real world was manifesting itself. Life - cold, cruel and indifferent, couldn't care less about their problems. There was no greater good, no moral high ground. There was just Kagome and Inuyasha, who were powerless to fight the tidal wave of conformity that was sweeping them along with it.

"It's over now," Inuyasha said, and Kagome nodded, feeling her heart breaking. The night's ordeal was over, and so were a lot of other things. Defeated, she slumped back against Inuyasha, feeling empty.

She couldn't make a difference, not even in the life of one person.   


  
@@@  
More angst! But there's minor fluff too! Next chapter is giving me hell, but I like the way it's coming out. So it should be posted within a reasonable amount of time.

And for the curious - no, Inuyasha and Kagome don't fall asleep in eachother's arms... As you'll see in the next chapter, Kagome quite boringly goes up to bed, and Inuyasha sleeps on the couch as per usual. Sorry if this disapoints you, but it just seemed too cliche to have them sleep together, and they're both too depressed to get all cuddly and kissy at the moment. When they finally do fall in love/realize they're in love with eachother I want it to be more deliberate and meaningful. The trauma of the night did bring them infinitely closer though, as I hope you could tell a little bit both here and in the last chapter. 

I did play around with the idea of Inuyasha having nightmares and Kagome comforting him in the middle of the night, but that also seemed cliche and I really don't think Inuyasha's the type to have nightmares since he deals with his anger and fear in the moment he feels them, and doesn't seem to repress his emotions or dwell on things much. Nor is he the type to accept comfort after doing something as horrifyingly vulnerable as screaming in his sleep. ~_^


	19. A Change Of Tides

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story!

**Notes: **Well someone asked about Kouga, and I was thinking about how I wasn't going to include him in the fic because I couldn't think of a good role for him - and then it dawned on me that he'd be _perfect_ for the role of the - heh, didn't think I was actually gonna give it away, did you!? But yes, I've just recently decided that he's going to be a part of the fic because there's a truly ideal role for him coming up soon. It was almost too good to be true - I think you guys might understand when you get to meet my version of Kouga just why I'm so excited about it. But it fits so perfectly!! Okay, I'll stop spasming now.

For clarification, Naraku will not be reappearing in a serious context. That I am aware of. Characters do tend to write themselves in, though, so you *may* be seeing him again. He was never intended to have a large part, just as a sort of step in the character development. I was going to use Hojou, but that would be WAY out of character for him and I actually think that if Naraku grew up in the present time he'd just be a lonely, confused, rather warped individual rather than an evil arch-villain.

As for Sesshoumaru and his stats, I'm so not gonna go there! You guys can infer whatever makes you happy about his talents and/or uh endowments if you will.

Sorry for the delays, I'm trying my hardest! Can't make any promises about when the next chapter will be out though, this class is sucking the life, soul, and creative energy out of me. Please try to empathize!

**Response to Reviews:**

**Mynuet** - It would be great if Kagome could just free Inuyasha, but in the eyes of the law as of this moment, slaves can never be anything other than slaves. There's no such thing as freeing a slave =\

**Calendar** - Thanks for the clarification on Kagome's eyes. ^_^

**Rasberries** - Kikyo isn't a miko, but she doesn't have to be to hurt Sesshoumaru - he's not allowed to defend himself in any way, so he's kind of stuck with her and whatever she decides to do to him.

**Mara** - I'm a real happy ending person - can't stand it when people end up sad! 

**Dark Syren** - Thanks for reading, and for being a wonderful reviewer!  


**KagomeWannabe** - Thanks for mentioning Kouga and getting me thinking about him - I'm really psyched about my new role for him! And don't worry, Sango is on the way. ^_^

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 19: A Change of Tides. **

Kagome woke up. It was strange, because it was the first time she could remember waking up and actually being immediately *awake*. There was no transitional sleepiness, no hazy phase of unreality before her eyes opened. She simply opened her eyes and the world around her came into focus.

It was as though while she slept, her brain had quietly and methodically worked out what had to be done. An epiphany, a dawning comprehension, a strange new insight that hadn't been there before. The realization didn't come the way she'd always thought it would, with a brilliant flash that left one gasping for breath in the aftermath, or in a tidal wave of sudden knowledge that left the recipient struggling to comprehend the new information. 

Instead it was, quite simply, there. It was as though something that had been lying dormant in her mind had awoken, quietly, unobtrusively altering the world and her perception of it forever.

Kagome sat up, the new sense of purpose that infused her thoughts practically radiating off of her. She knew what she had to do, and she knew how to do it. All the uncertainty and emotional turmoil of last night was gone, leaving a lightness in her chest, a determination in her eyes.

She didn't bother to change before going into her study and shutting the door. Quickly she located her books on government and law, sitting down and pulling the phone closer to her. She would need that later.

It wasn't hard to find what she was looking for. Courts. Court rulings. Loads of information that would help her with what she was planning. There was a lot of it to wade through, but Kagome didn't even blink as she began to read. She didn't think about food or even what time it was, and so when the phone rang and she glanced up groggily, she was amazed to realize that she'd spent nearly four hours looking over the material she'd picked out already.

Reaching out, she picked up the phone. "Hello?"

"Kagome"

It was Rin, but Kagome almost didn't recognize her voice. It was subdued, choked with tears, the youthful, optimistic lilt gone completely. "What happened?" Kagome gasped, gripping the phone tighter. What could Kikyo possibly have done to make Rin sound to dispirited?

"Oh Kagome! It's all so horrible. Kikyo knew about the plan the whole time. She must have overheard me on the phone with you. She was just waiting for us to go upstairs before - Is Inuyasha all right?"

"He's fine - or at least he says he is, and he seemed all right. Everything is okay. But what did she do to you? And is Sesshoumaru okay?"

"Oh, *I'm* fine," Rin said, and Kagome winced at the uncharacteristic bitterness in her tone. "She hasn't said a word to me since last night - just given me false little pitying smiles and condescending glances. But she made Sesshoumaru tell her about all the times I brought him food after seeing that tray last night, so - " Rin's voice broke on a sob, and Kagome's heart went out to her. 

"It's okay, Rin," she said gently. "I - "

"It's not okay!" Rin shrieked, her voice rising to a hysterical screech. "Don't you see? It's my fault! It's *my* fault she hurt him because I c-can't take the blame mys-self!"

Rin was crying openly now, and Kagome's teeth ground together as cold, unforgiving anger welled up in her. She had always been quick to anger, and quicker to forgive. This was something different than her usual cloudburst of emotion - something that ran with more depth and was far less fleeting. She could tell that her fury at a society that would allow such disgusting practices would burn a long time indeed.

"I do understand Rin. I really do." And she did. She hadn't been able to take the blame that was rightfully hers last night either - Inuyasha had suffered in her stead. Something in her voice must have convinced Rin that she was telling the truth because her sobs lessened and Kagome could tell she was trying to compose herself.

"Anyway," the other girl said, a tiny spark of her usual cheer showing through, though Kagome got the feeling it was somewhat forced. "That isn't all I called about. My parents decided Sesshoumaru's not enough, since he belongs to Kikyo and she keeps him at home most of the time - I need my own *personal* slave."

"Why?" Kagome gasped, confused as to why Rin's family would suddenly see it fit to give her a slave.

"I told them about what happened with you and Naraku. Now they think Boston is dangerous so they want me to be protected when I'm at school and stuff. They're sending me a level 10 protector. I didn't even bother to argue with them. She's already on her way here and I have to pick her up at the train station at 2:00 today."

"Do you want me to come with you?" Kagome asked worriedly.

"Would you?" Rin's tone took on a note of more genuine happiness. "That would be wonderful. Oh - But Miroku is coming."

"That's okay. I can deal with Miroku for an afternoon."

Rin laughed shakily. "You're a great friend, Kagome."

Kagome rolled her eyes, standing up and stretching. "I'm only doing what any decent person would do."

"You say that about everything, even when you're the only person in the world who it applies to," Rin pointed out affectionately. 

Ignoring this last bit, Kagome glanced at the clock again. "I'm just going to take a shower and then I'll drive over. Do you want to take my car to the station?"

"That's fine. Miroku and I will be ready."

The two girls hung up, and Kagome quickly showered and got ready to go out. When she came downstairs Inuyasha was sitting at the kitchen table staring out the window. He didn't turn to look at her as she entered the room. Kagome briefly considered disclosing what she'd spent most of the morning doing, but didn't want to get his hopes up before she was certain of what was going to happen. Instead she gave him a quick once over, trying to assess if he were still hurt from last night. 

"How are you feeling?" she asked, slightly concerned by his lack of energy.

Golden eyes shifted from the view back to her, and she was disappointed to see that the shields holding in his emotions that had been missing last night were back in place.

"I'm fine," he said, a hint of exasperation in his tone.

Kagome sighed inwardly. Well, what had she expected? "I'm going with Rin and Miroku to the train station - Rin's family is worried about her after what happened with Naraku, so they're sending her a slave to protect her. Will you be all right alone for the day?"

"What do you mean will I be all right? I told you I'm fine." He glared at her challengingly.

Kagome glared back, her contrariness sparking up to match his. She marched over, tempted to poke him in the chest and force him to admit weakness but refraining out of worry. "I should rebandage that," she informed him, practically daring him to contradict her.

Instead he just smirked back. "Fine."

Blinking at his unexpected complacency, Kagome reached determinedly for his shirt and undid the top three buttons, surprised again when he didn't pull away. "You took off the bandage," she started, her tone heavy with disapproval, before she broke off in amazement.

The wound was gone. Not healed over, or even scarred - gone without a trace. His skin was as smooth and flawless as ever. She stared dumbly. "How"

"I told you," he muttered, jerking away and rebuttoning the shirt. "That was nothing. If you'd come a few minutes later then maybe you would've had to worry."

Kagome winced at the reminder of how she'd failed to protect him, how it was her fault that this had happened to him. Her resolve strengthened even more - she had to make it up to him somehow - had to pay the debt she owed him for what had happened. There was only one way she could think of to do that but it would have to wait a little while. She still had to go pick up Rin and Miroku.

Stepping back from Inuyasha, she turned away under the pretense of grabbing a breakfast bar from the cabinet. Her stomach growled, reminding her that she hadn't eaten since lunch the day before. Better make that two breakfast bars.

"Will you be okay alone?" she repeated her question from earlier as she turned back to the hanyou who was now regarding her narrowly. "What?" she snapped, unnerved and not wanting him to know it.

"You're plotting something," he accused. She stared at him in amazement, to shocked to reply. "Don't bother to deny it," he continued, "I can smell it."

Recovering slightly, Kagome rolled her eyes at him. "Don't get all paranoid on me. I'm not *plotting* anything."

His disdainful expression said he didn't believe her for an instant. He turned away and Kagome had the strangest feeling that she had *hurt* him - that what she had said had *mattered* in a way that throwing quick barbs back and forth had not. For a moment she almost relented and told him everything, but she was going to be late if she didn't leave soon, and she didn't want him to know until she was further along in her planning. With a sigh, she turned and left, locking the front door behind her. Did everything in life have to be painful?  


  


@@@  
Well I haven't explicitly stated it yet, but can you guess what the second half of this fic is going to be about? 

I have lots of plans in my head - the problem is getting them onto my screen! But hang in there, I'll get to it all eventually.


	20. Instant Attraction

**Disclaimer:** Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story! 

**Notes: **Okay, so I'm really really sorry it's been so long since I've updated. I'm lazy, uninspired, and inconsiderate. I want to finish this story so badly, but real life is getting in the way... I can't promise you guys anything. I don't have any excuses - I'm only human and I apologize! I understand if you hate me forever, but I hope you continue to read the story anyway.

Sango makes her first appearance here and I'm not too happy with her character. Any suggestions you have would help a lot. I'm sort of resigned to the fact that she's going to be ooc for the whole fic and there's not much I can do about it. I hope to work her in at least two or three more times after this and I have one definite scene planned for the end so I'd like to feel more satisfied about writing her. 

The next chapters are going to be hard for me to write and I might try to gloss over them a little so I can get to the good stuff. Let me know if they suck a lot so I can try to rewrite them. Thanks so much for all your reviews... I don't deserve them! They are what kept me from completely abandoning this story, and I'm continuing it for you guys. I hope it's worth the wait... I hope I manage to get more chapters up in a reasonable period of time. Ja ne minna. You all rock! 

**Chapter 20: Instant Attraction.**

The ride to the train station was relatively painless for Kagome, who listened to Miroku's lighthearted babble and observed Rin's quickly returning cheerfulness with relief. She firmly put Inuyasha out of her mind, promising herself that she would work on resolving her plans for his future later, and acknowledging that there was nothing she could do at the moment to help him.

She was still discomforted by the look of anger and almost betrayal she'd seen in his eyes earlier. Kagome was unable to begin to fathom what it could mean. With a sigh, she pulled into the train station and parked the car as close to the main platform as she could get. 

The three friends got out of the car and Rin checked her watch. "The train should be her in about five minutes," she told them as they climbed the stairs to wait on the wooden benches next to the tracks. There were very few people around, and the air was clear and cool, with a bit of the nip of approaching winter that Kagome had become accustomed to while living in New England.

Miroku, after performing a perfunctory scan for members of the opposite sex, settled down on a bench in a manner that Kagome could only describe as subdued. Lectures had never seemed to deter him from his behavior before, but Kagome thought that perhaps she and Rin had finally managed to talk some sense into him.

Putting Miroku out of her mind, Kagome sat down next to her friend, putting a comforting arm around her. "How are you doing?" she asked, still concerned despite the other girl's seeming recovery.

Rin shrugged noncommittally, a shadow flitting over her face. "Better than Sesshoumaru," she said shortly, effectively killing the conversation. Kagome sighed and sat back to wait for the train.

It wasn't long before the low rumbling could be heard in the distance, and Kagome looked up to watch the massive train roll lazily into the station. The three remained seated as a few passengers exited the train and walked briskly toward waiting taxis or cars in the parking lot. Kagome watched somewhat apathetically for a young woman to come off the train, but the doors closed before anyone fitting the description of Rin's slave exited. Kagome glanced at Rin, opening her mouth to comment, but Rin was looking down the track at the end car of the train.

Kagome closed her mouth quickly, stifling the quick flash of anger at the realization that slaves traveled separately and in a small, uncomfortable car at the end of the train.

There was only one inhabitant of the car that slaves were relegated to, and Kagome watched in silence as a small figure descended to the platform, pausing to reach back inside the car to retrieve a gigantic weapon shaped like a boomerang. Kagome was momentarily impressed by the obvious strength it took to wield the impressive weapon and the apparent effortlessness with which the young woman did so. Rin had finally risen to her feet and was walking to meet her, and Kagome quickly followed suit.

The girl had a classic beauty, Kagome noted as they approached her. Her black hair was pulled up off her face in an elegant twist, and intelligent, wary dark eyes were kept locked on the ground in front of her as the group drew nearer.

Kagome glanced back at Miroku, and was startled by the look on his face. The normal infatuation was there, but it was accompanied by something close to bedazzlement. Before Kagome could stop him he had moved forward to cut off Rin and take both the girls hands. He tried to look earnestly into her face, which was difficult when both of her eyes were still firmly planted on the ground.

"Light of my eyes!" he declared passionately, and Kagome held off a resigned sigh, thinking sardonically that clearly she'd been wrong in thinking she and Rin had had any effect on Miroku's promiscuousness whatsoever. "Your beauty is beyond comparison – you've made me blind to reason. I have no choice but to ask you to bear my child."

"Baka!" Kagome shouted at him, smacking him across the back of his head. "How can you ask that of someone who can't refuse you?" The girl herself had no response, but Kagome was certain that she must be thinking what a lot of lunatics lived in Boston.

Rin gave Miroku a disgusted glance as she pried his hands off of her new slave and smiled reassuringly at her. "I'm sorry about him. I'm Rin, your new master, and this is Kagome." She knelt and touched the ground at their feet and Kagome winced and looked away. "You can stand," Rin told her. "We'll be heading home now. Is that all you have with you?" She gestured at the boomerang.

"Yes," The girl responded quietly.

"We'll have to put it on top of the car," Rin mused, reaching to take it from the girl and staggering under the weight. "Miroku, help me with this!"

"Of course," he said, eager to show off his prowess in front of his latest obsession. Unfortunately for him, the boomerang was nearly too much for both of them together, and Kagome couldn't hold back her giggle as the two tottered toward the car, struggling not to drop the heavy weapon.

She turned to smile at the girl beside her now that they were alone. "I'm Kagome," she said, having learned that the best way to get through the reservations slaves had about masters was sheer normality. "What's your name?"

The girl couldn't repress the startled glance she threw at Kagome. When Kagome only smiled reassuringly rather than berating her for her lapse in control, she replied, "Sango." There was more wariness in the tone now, as if she were suspecting some kind of trick.

Kagome nodded politely. "It's nice to meet you. Did you have a good trip?" The question was at random, and the girl gave her another strange look. Kagome didn't blame her, but at least she was thawing out.

"The trip was… fine. Long." They lapsed into silence. Sango surprised Kagome by speaking abruptly. "Are you a Higurashi?"

Kagome blinked. "Yes… how did you know?"

"I know your mother. She tried to help my brother and I once… It was a long time ago." Sorrow and bitterness colored Sango's tone, and Kagome couldn't help but ask.

"Your brother? Is he a slave too?"

Sango nodded jerkily. "We were separated when we were sold into slavery. I don't know where he is now, or even if he's still alive."

"That's horrible!" Kagome whispered, icy fingers of horror touching the nape of her neck as she imagined a similar separation from her own little brother. "That must have been…" She trailed off, full of empathy for this girl. "I'm sorry." The words felt inadequate, but there was nothing Kagome could do. She mentally berated herself for her fatalistic attitude, resolving to look into the matter later. "What was his name?" she asked.

"Kohaku. Your mother tried to intercede but it was too late."

Kagome winced. If her mother had been unable to help Sango and her brother it seemed very unlikely that Kagome would be able to do so. But she had to try. 

"Hey!" Called Rin from the car where she and Miroku had finished latching the boomerang to the top of the car. "Are you coming Kagome?"

Kagome filed her newest resolution away with all the rest and smiled ruefully at her new friend. "I guess we better go." Suddenly feeling as though she had to give the girl some kind of hope she touched her arm, a pained look in her eyes. "Sango… Don't – " She broke off in frustration. What could she possibly say to this girl? Don't lose hope? Don't give up? Everything she could think of sounded as trite and empty and useless as her apology earlier. She couldn't even begin to understand what this girl had suffered through. How could she presume to offer her hope?

"Yes?" Sango was staring at her with wide, clear brown eyes, expectant yet cautious. Kagome's relation to the woman who had tried to help her obviously won her points in the slave's eyes and she was quick to see her as a possible ally. Her brother was her driving force, the hope that kept her going, and in Kagome she must have seen the potential for... something. 

Kagome shook her head. "Nothing." They walked together toward the car in companionable silence. "Stay clear of Kikyo," Kagome warned Sango quietly before they were in hearing range. "Rin's older sister. She's dangerous."

Sango nodded almost imperceptibly. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me," said Kagome, feeling as if the weight of a thousand lives were on her shoulders. Don't thank me. I don't deserve it yet.  


@@@

Now back to the even more serious stuff... and back to Inuyasha, who I've left all alone for this whole chapter. 


	21. Giving Up Hope

**Disclaimer: **Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story! 

**Notes:** This chapter came out better than the last one I think, although it's just as unsatisfying. Can you see why I hate writing this part? It's so depressing and slow-paced. But unfortunately necessary.

As you may be able to tell I'm sort of floundering here. I know what I want to happen but I'm having trouble writing in the intermediate steps. Like I said before, I have most of the end of the story already written out and edited and ready to go. Yet I still have no idea how long this story is going to be at this point. I guess my earlier approximation that I was about halfway through might be accurate.

Another disclaimer before you read this chapter: I know nothing - I repeat NOTHING - about law. I'm making up stuff that sounds good as I go along in this story, and it's only going to get worse from here on out. I don't have the time or patience to research how the law is actually carried out in something like Kagome's case, so I'm giving my best effort to make it seem believable. Hope it's not too painfully inaccurate! 

Enjoy!

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 21: Giving Up Hope**

After dropping off Rin, Sango and Miroku, Kagome sat for a moment in front of Rin's house staring blankly out the window. It was only three – picking up Sango had barely taken an hour. Pulling away from the curb, Kagome drove by reflex. Her mind was on the overwhelming amount of work she was going to have to do – on top of all her work for school. There was no help for it though… she knew she couldn't live with herself if she ignored the people around her who needed help.

She pulled into the driveway, still trying to psych herself up for all the work she had to do. Somehow though, she found her thoughts wandering to Inuyasha… more specifically to how hurt he had seemed when she hadn't divulged her plans to him. She gnawed her lower lip for a moment, staring up at the big house. Should she let him in on it now? She wanted to smooth things over with him as soon as possible, because the thought of hurting him more than he'd already been hurt by others was something she didn't want to have on her conscience. But she was so uncertain of everything right now… what if she got his hopes up only to shatter them again?

Kagome frowned at herself and started toward the house. Her plans concerned him… he was a major figure in them. It was his right to know about them, and she felt guilty for even thinking about trying to protect him by keeping the truth from him. Which meant she had to tell him… now.

Bracing herself, Kagome let herself into the house. She checked the living room and the kitchen first, and when he wasn't there she glanced outside to the backyard and downstairs to the basement. Frowning as she came back upstairs, she acknowledged that not being able to find him was pretty anticlimactic compared to the big confrontation she'd been expecting. Quite honestly she didn't imagine him to be happy about her plans. It was much more likely he'd try to argue her out of them.

Annoyed that she'd run into yet another obstacle and resigned to the fact that she would have to wait to let Inuyasha in on her plans, Kagome retreated to her study to pick up where she'd left off. Going over what she'd found so far was somewhat encouraging… there was really no precedent for freeing a slave, which meant that it might be possible. She had been afraid of finding that others had tried and failed in the past, but it looked like the court system had never been required to make a decision on the issue before. 

It wasn't much, but it was something. Now she had to find a judge, preferably one in a court nearby, who would take the case. And she had to try to find a lawyer to back her up. She decided to try finding the lawyer first, and picked up the list of names she'd accumulated during her search. Dialing the first number, she waited apprehensively.

"Hi, this is Kagome Higurashi… I have a case I'd like to propose to you…"

An hour later Kagome let her head fall onto her desk in despair. Not one of the lawyers she'd called would take the case, and none of them had been able to recommend someone who would. They'd all but laughed at her, telling her that there was no way any court would allow a case like that to be heard, not to mention the fact that the chances of her actually winning the case were worse than abysmal.

It had been such a long day, and Kagome felt like it had just been struggling to get past one obstacle after another – and failing. How was she ever going to accomplish anything at this rate? A pounding headache was starting up in the corners of her temples, and all she really wanted to do was crawl into bed and hide. All of her inspiration from that morning was gone, and in it's place was a coldness… an emptiness that seemed to eat away at her with each passing second.

Almost without realizing what she was doing she reached for the phone again and dialed the phone number of her mother's office. Surprisingly it was her mother who answered, and not a secretary or an aide. 

"Hi Mom," Kagome said, trying to sound cheerful, as though she had only called to say hello and not because she was desperate for words of wisdom… desperate for her mother to hand her the solution, to point out the obvious answer that Kagome was missing, to restore her faith in the inherent goodness of the human race.

Her mother didn't seem at all surprised to hear her daughter's voice. She chatted briefly about her day and asked Kagome about hers. Kagome glossed over the details at first, but soon could hold herself back no longer.

"Mom… do you think slavery is wrong?"

Her mother didn't even hesitate. "Of course I do, Sweetheart."

This didn't reassure Kagome at all. "But Mom… if you really think it's wrong why don't you change it? You have so much power and influence… if you said something people would listen to you. How can you just sit back and live with it when you say you believe it's wrong?"

Her mother sighed, and Kagome was deeply disturbed by the note of guilt in her mother's voice when she spoke next. Even though she had been the one to accuse her mother of not being true to herself, a part of her had still expected an easy, sensible explanation. 

"Slavery one of many, many things that I have not been able to change over the course of my life, Kagome. There is much that is wrong with the world, and there are so many things that I struggle to change, even a little bit, every day. I did try once, to make a difference, but even my best efforts were not enough. The world isn't ready to rid itself of slavery, darling, and though I can push for small steps in the right direction I can't make everything better. No one person can do that, no matter how smart or rich or powerful they are." Slow tears were running down Kagome's face by the time her mother finished. It hurt to have the truth shoved in her face – her mother *was* only human. 

_The world isn't ready to rid itself of slavery._

And as much as her heart ached for Inuyasha, after running into so many roadblocks while trying to *begin* her protest against slavery, Kagome couldn't' argue with the simple, cruel truth of her mother's statement. The world wasn't ready. 

But something else in what her mother had said caught her attention. "Mom… when you said you tried once to make a difference… did it involve a slave named Sango? And her younger brother?"

"How did you know?" her mother asked, surprise and amazement etched into her voice. "It's been so long – you were just a child at the time."

"Rin's family just sent her a slave – that slave was Sango. She remembered you and recognized me as your daughter."

"Amazing," Ms. Higurashi said, sounding glad, almost relieved. "I had not idea what had happened to her after – It's such a comfort to know that she's survived."

Kagome didn't really think there was anything comfortable about slavery, but instead of pointing that out she said, "I have a favor to ask, Mom. I want you to try to track down her brother. She doesn't know if he's alive or dead, or where he is. I thought maybe you could help me find out."

"Hmm." A rustling of papers on the other line told her that her mother was making a note of the request. "It should be possible, slaves are tracked very carefully through the system. And I should still have both of their identification numbers on record from the case years ago. Give me a few days and I'll get back to you with anything I find."

"Thanks Mom," Kagome replied, feeling slightly better. "I love you."

After hanging up the phone Kagome stared blankly into space for a moment. The question now was whether she should resign herself to the fact that Inuyasha could never be free or if she should continue on her seemingly futile search for a court – any court – that would hear her case.

Now that she was seeing things from a devastatingly cynical (or was it rational?) perspective, it seemed almost ludicrous. Even if she did get a hearing, she thought, incredulous at her own naiveté, how would any judge be able to find an impartial jury? Who in a society that had integrated slavery so deeply into itself would ever rule that a slave could be freed? And to find six such people? 

Her resolution seemed so childish in retrospect. Kagome felt as though she had aged twenty years in one day. Suddenly she was glad she had decided not to tell Inuyasha about her plan, since it seemed that after only a few short hours it had turned to dust beneath her feet.

Feeling an urge to see Inuyasha, wondering if he had reappeared after his apparent disappearance that afternoon, she went to the top of the stairs and began to descend. Halfway down she heard the sound of the TV and someone banging pots around in the kitchen. So he was home then. 

Something made her hesitate on the steps though – shame, perhaps? As much as she wanted to see him, to talk to him, to straighten out their strange argument this morning, she abruptly felt that she couldn't face him. Turning quickly, fighting back tears for what seemed like the hundredth time that day, Kagome fled to her room.

Lying on her bed, staring unseeingly at the ceiling, she found it difficult to focus on anything. 

_The world isn't ready to rid itself of slavery._

She couldn't get the sentence out of her head. It chased her other thoughts like a self-perpetuating echo. The sun set, and still Kagome lay, oblivious to the world, trying to come to terms with her defeat.  


@@@  
Still no Inuyasha... I promise he'll be in the next chaper. I promise he and Kagome will patch up their relationship then. At least I think I promise. Maybe.


	22. Serendipity

**Disclaimer: **Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story! 

**Notes:** Um. Yeah. I don't even know what to say here after being conspicuously absent for the past year. Sorry? Somehow that just doesn't cut it. I REALLY appreciate all the people who have reviewed this story - seeing your comments in my inbox is a constant reminder that I need to devote my spare time to finishing this fic. And it will get finished. I mean that. I don't know how long it will take, but I WILL finish it.

So anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter. Another character gets introduced (finally) - I'll give you three guesses as to who. First two don't count.

**Another disclaimer before you read this chapter:** I know nothing - I repeat NOTHING - about law. I'm making up stuff that sounds good as I go along in this story, and it's only going to get worse from here on out. I don't have the time or patience to research how the law is actually carried out in something like Kagome's case, so I'm giving my best effort to make it seem believable. Hope it's not too painfully inaccurate!

Enjoy!

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 22: Serendipity**

The next few days passed in a haze of classes, homework, and dealing with the every-day tasks that had seemed so trivial before they'd become Kagome's responsibility: cleaning, laundry, and general maintenance of the house.

She and Inuyasha hadn't talked about the source of his annoyance or hurt or whatever it had been. By this time Kagome had half-convinced herself she'd imagined the whole thing. Everything seemed back to normal – or at least as normal as things could get when Kagome was always walking on eggshells around him, trying not to push her opinions on what he should do or wear onto him.

Kagome was glad but a little unsure that he didn't seem bothered by the fact that he hadn't accompanied her to school since that disastrous day last week. He still wore the clothes she'd given him, however, which made her feel a little better about everything. More reassuringly, he was constantly getting fed up with something – the fact that she'd tried to mix colors in with whites when doing her first wash, or the mess she'd made trying to wax the floor. She always had to fight with him to get him to show her how to do whatever had been giving her trouble rather than just kicking her out of his way and doing it himself.

Now it was either a war to see who could get the chores done first, or a running joke between them… Kagome couldn't tell. All she knew was that she was desperately glad that she was so busy that she didn't have to _think_ about things.

Sometimes, late at night or during one of the moments during class when her attention abruptly wandered, she would think about Sesshoumaru, or Kikyo, or the vacant look in the eyes of the slaves she'd seen in the store where Inuyasha had been. And it hurt – it hurt to think about them and know that she couldn't help. So whenever it happened she would do her best to distract herself and go on with her life. She supposed that it would get easier with time – and it helped to focus on the difference she could make to Inuyasha. Not much, but something, at least.

* * *

Kagome breathed a sigh of relief. It was finally Friday, and her last class had just ended. She had finally managed to catch up with all of her assignments, and today she'd decided it was time to give herself a break. She'd made plans with Rin to walk into a nearby part of town where there were lots of interesting shops and restaurants.

Seeing her friend waiting on the sidewalk, Kagome waved and jogged over to meet her. "Are you ready?" she asked. "My car is parked along the way we'll be heading, we can drop off our books."

"Sounds good," Rin said cheerfully, and Kagome was pleased to see that the younger girl seemed to have fully recovered from the incident with her older sister. The two girls feel into step alongside one another, and after a moment of comfortable silence Kagome got up the courage to ask.

"Rin… How are things with Kikyo?"

Beside her, her friend stiffened. Rin sighed, her face falling. "She's been nice to me," she said. "_Really_ nice. Not that she isn't usually nice but this is different. Now she's acting like I've learned an important lesson, like she's lording this ridiculous superiority over me. Like I should have_ known_ I'd get caught, and she only taught me the lesson that I needed to learn."

Kagome felt a distant sympathy. She herself didn't have to deal with any confrontations with Kikyo, and poor Rin had to see the cold, calculating, merciless woman every single day. Had to pretend to get along with her, to agree with her. Had to see the way she treated Sesshoumaru, and know that there was nothing she could do.

She clamped down on the frustration building up in her, the frantic desperation that screamed that there must be _something_ they could do, some way to help Sesshoumaru and keep Kikyo from hurting anyone else. Some way to put things_ right_, to make things the way they should be.

Taking a deep breath, she stopped next to her car and unlocked the door. Tossing her backpack inside, she stepped away so that Rin could follow suit. There was one thing she could do. "Are you all right, living there?" she said, peering concernedly at Rin. "Because you can come live with me. You and Sango."

Rin stared at her in amazement. "Do you mean it Kagome?" Emotions flitted across her face in quick succession. "But – no. No, I can't. I would, but…" She trailed off and shook her head helplessly but determinedly. "Not without Sesshoumaru. I'm not going to leave him there."

Kagome stared, nonplussed, as they started walking again. "You really like him."

"I love him," Rin said sharply, but without bite. "I wish - " She broke off, and Kagome didn't think it would be a good idea to pry further into the subject.

Instead, she changed to a more neutral subject. "How's Sango? I saw her with you in school today, why isn't she with us?"

Rin shrugged. "I sent her home, told her to tell anyone who asked that Inuyasha was with us. I just wanted to spend some time with you. And… I don't know. You must be rubbing off on me. I don't like having someone following me around doing things for me all the time."

"You're against slavery too?" Kagome said, surprised and hopeful.

Rin blinked, startled to hear it phrased that way. It wasn't quite what she'd said, but was it what she'd meant? After a long moment of consideration she nodded slowly. "I guess I am."

Kagome was quiet, thinking. If she'd changed the opinion of even one person… if she'd made just ONE person realize that the institution was wrong… that had to count for something, right?

She was so lost in her own thoughts that she didn't even see the other person in front of her until they'd crashed into one another.

"Oh!" She said, catching her balance and looking up to meet the young man's startlingly blue eyes. "I'm sorry. I wasn't looking where I was going."

The man had been as surprised as she was initially, but quickly recovered and smiled charmingly. "No problem. I'm Kouga. What's your name?"

She blinked at his bluntness and cautiously took the hand he'd offered her and shook it. "Kagome."

"Nice to meet you Kagome," he smiled. "It isn't every day I run into such a lovely young woman – two lovely women, in fact." He grinned at Rin.

"Oh," said Kagome, covering her embarrassment by distracting him, "This is Rin. We were just on our way downtown. We won't keep you."

"It's really no problem at all," Kouga told them. "I was rushing back to work, but my boss can wait. We haven't had much business lately."

"Where do you work?" Rin asked politely.

Kouga pointed. "Just over there. I just got the job a few weeks ago, right out of law school."

"You're a lawyer?" Kagome exclaimed, staring at the courthouse across the street.

"A judge!" Kouga said, puffing out his chest, pleased with what he misinterpreted as her impressed awe.

"A judge? Do you know lawyers who don't have a lot of work either?"

He shrugged. "Of course. No work for me means that there's no work for them either."

Kagome only thought for a moment before making her decision. Rin's mind had been changed because of Kagome's conviction. Kouga was a new lawyer who was down on work. And she_ owed_ it to Inuyasha to try one more time.

Slowly, Kagome turned her head back to look at the tall, dark haired man. "Kouga," she said. "I've got a case that I want you to take. If you find me a lawyer who'll take it I can pay you – I can pay them. Whatever it takes."

It obviously wasn't what he'd been expecting, but he perked up immediately. "A case?" he said. "What case?"

Rin was staring at Kagome in consternation. "You can't be serious, Kagome."

Kagome ignored her completely. "You might think I'm crazy," she told Kouga in a rush. "Everyone else has so far. But I'm serious. I'll do whatever it takes." He was watching her expectantly, looking intrigued and stubborn – as if he wanted to prove wrong all of the people who had called Kagome crazy. She felt another surge of hope. "Kouga," she said, taking a deep breath. "I want to free my slave."

* * *

Three hours later, Kagome and Rin left Kouga's office – Rin looking bewildered and amazed, and Kagome elated and with a feeling of deep satisfaction and wild excitement. He'd said yes. He was going to take her case to court.

The lawyer he'd found had seemed skeptical at first, but like Kouga he was young and ambitious, eager to do what no one had ever done before. He'd quickly warmed to Kagome's cause.

The hard part, the part that had been holding her back, had been finding a judge who would hear her case, and once that was out of the way finding a lawyer who would take her money and work on her case had been trivial in comparison.

Driving home, she couldn't stop smiling. Because she was going home to tell Inuyasha what she'd done – and tomorrow she would bring him to meet her lawyer and Kouga. She didn't know what was going to happen, but at least now she would know that she'd tried.

* * *

Ok, I lied. No Inuyasha - again. But he WILL be in the next chapter - this time I DEFINITELY promise. 


	23. Breaking The News

**Disclaimer: **Unfortunately, I don't own Inuyasha. Nor do I own Kagome, Sesshoumaru, Rin, Kagome's family, or any of the other copyrighted characters that may or may not appear in this fic. So please don't sue me, and enjoy the story! 

**Notes:** Finally, back to Inuyasha! I'm hoping this chapter lives up to everyone's expectations... you've all been very, very, very patient.

I'm going to leave the law disclaimer up, possibly for the rest of the story, since as people have pointed out, my interpretation of the legal process isn't very accurate. Thank you, everyone who gave me tips or real information - I don't think I'll be going back to fix it, but you never know. Plus, I always like learning new things.

**Another disclaimer before you read this chapter:** I know nothing - I repeat NOTHING - about law. I'm making up stuff that sounds good as I go along in this story, and it's only going to get worse from here on out. I don't have the time or patience to research how the law is actually carried out in something like Kagome's case, so I'm giving my best effort to make it seem believable. Hope it's not too painfully inaccurate!

Enjoy!

**Learning to Let Go **

**Chapter 23: Breaking the News**

Kagome paced in the living room, her arms wrapped around herself, caught between extremes of anxiety and excitement. Inuyasha hadn't been in the house when she'd gotten home, and rather than walk outside and trek the few minutes it took to reach the large tree where he usually went for seclusion and fresh air, she decided it would be better to wait until he came in himself.

The few times she'd interrupted his solitary introspection shouting matches had ensued, and she didn't relish in the idea of breaking her news to him by yelling it up at him.

But she hadn't expected the waiting to be so hard. She'd tried to do homework at first, to get a head start on next week, but her thoughts wouldn't focus on anything but the past few hours. And she couldn't stop coming back to her worries about what the next few would be like.

Had she been wrong? Would Inuyasha really be happy, or would he be angry? He'd told her that she was naïve before, because of her attempts to treat him as she would a friend rather than a slave when they were in public. Would he say the same thing now? Would he be angry with her?

Her thoughts circled, and she became more and more muddled. It had seemed obvious that he would be elated at the chance to be free when she was proposing the case, but now, faced with the prospect of explaining it to him, her stomach was in knots. Would it have been better to tell him ahead of time?

From the back of the house, she heard a faint thump as the door opened and shut. Too late to think about whether she'd done the right thing now.

When Inuyasha came into the room, she opened her mouth to speak immediately, but her voice caught in her throat. He was shrugging out of the jacket she'd bought for him, and as had been happening far too often lately Kagome was entranced by the contour of his shoulder blades, the lines of his body.

Forcing her mind back to the matter at hand, she bit her lip and frowned. How was she going to start this conversation?

He paused after draping his jacket over the back of the couch, glancing at her. His expression went from mild amusement, to confusion, to wariness. "What?" he snapped finally.

She started, fidgeted, cleared her throat. Still couldn't come up with a good way to bring up the subject they needed to talk about. "Inuyasha…"

He was looking more agitated by the minute. "What's your problem? What the hell is going on?"

"Are you happy?" Kagome blurted, and then winced at how lame that sounded.

He stared at her incredulously. "Why are you asking me that? Are you going to get rid of me?"

"No!" she cried, understanding the source of his agitation suddenly. Irritation pricked her. "Why do you always assume stupid things like that? You know I'd never get rid of you unless you wanted to leave. I just – I want to know if you're happy. If you like things the way they are."

He'd relaxed slightly, but still didn't look comfortable with the direction the conversation was taking. "Kagome, you gave me clothes, and food, and you treat me like a person. You let me go outside. You never punish me. You don't expect anything of me. What else could I ask for?"

Kagome shook her head. "But those aren't – they don't – I want to know if you're happy. I mean you have nothing to do all day. You must be bored out of your mind with just video games and the TV and my computer to occupy you. You must wish that you could talk to someone besides me, that you could go other places, that you didn't have to be so careful about the way you act when we're out somewhere."

Inuyasha rolled his eyes impatiently. "I can't have any of those things, so there's no point in wishing for them. And if I'm not happy then I'm at least content."

"But…" Kagome hesitated, picking her words carefully. "What if you could have those things?"

He stared. "What are you talking about?"

She stepped forward, suddenly eager to get the whole story out. "I ran into a judge today. I'd been looking for one for a while, but no one would take the case and I'd given up hope – but he says he'll take it, and he found me a lawyer - "

Inuyasha stared. "He – what? Why do you need a lawyer? What case?"

She took a deep, shaky breath. "I want to take your case to court. I want to free you."

There was a long moment of absolute silence. Neither of them moved. Kagome stared into the Hanyou's depthless golden eyes, lost in the matrix of complex emotions there. Abruptly he spun away.

"Don't be an idiot. That's impossible."

"No one's tried it before!" Kagome protested. "There's no reason that - "

"There's every reason!" Inuyasha snapped. "Slavery is one of the most lucrative industries in the country! If you could free slaves it would destroy it's whole foundation. Nobody is going to sit by and watch that happen. They'll stop you."

Kagome lifted her chin stubbornly. "They can't stop me. I've already found a lawyer to represent me and a judge who'll hear the case."

"You don't understand – they'll stop you. They'll find a way. I thought you were starting to understand how this all works, but you're still naïve. This is a stupid idea."

Furious, Kagome reached out and grabbed his arm, spinning him around. He stared down at her, taken by surprise. "Don't call it stupid if your only argument against it is that other people won't like it!" she yelled at him, so angry that she was shaking. "Don't call me naïve when at least I'm trying to do what I think is right! If you don't want to be free then just tell me and I'll call it all off. But don't pull this bullshit about it being too idealistic. Don't sit here in my house for the rest of your life wondering what could have happened just because you're afraid."

She didn't swear often, and she could tell the force of her pronouncement had shocked him. She didn't care. She was still holding his arm, still trembling with emotion, still glaring at him, daring him to contradict her or continue to argue. The golden eyes softened, and he took her by surprise by reaching up and tracing his fingertips down her face and over her jaw in the lightest of touches. "Kagome…"

She didn't look away, her heart pounding out of something other than fury now. He was so close. If she stood on tiptoe, if she lifted her face just an inch, her upper lip would touch his lower lip. And somehow, she could tell that he was aware of the same thing. Something like heat lightning trembled between them for the barest instant – and then Inuyasha took a step back, prying her fingers off his arm with the hand that had touched her face just a moment ago. She felt a vague sense of loss as he let go of her hand.

"What do we need to do?"

His quiet question startled her out of the confused daze. Her blue eyes flew to his face in amazement. "You mean – you're going to - "

He crossed his arms over his chest and glared at her, but there was nothing behind it. "You've obviously got your heart set on it. Although I don't know how you have time to dream up these crazy little schemes in between all the other work you have to do."

She ignored his condescending tone and smiled brilliantly at him. "I'm so glad! I was so afraid you'd be angry!"

He sighed. "Why would your delusions of grandeur make me angry?"

She flung her arms around him, knocking him a step back with her enthusiasm. His eyes widened. He could never get used to her randomly inspired displays of affection. Before he could figure out whether he was supposed to hug her back or not, she pushed away. "We'll go back to the courthouse tomorrow and talk things through. Kouga said we might get a hearing by Monday – can you believe it? And I'll have to start my homework right away, or I'll never get it all done. I'm going to have to do research…" Her voice drifted off as she bounced out of the room to get her backpack and lock herself up in her study.

Inuyasha stared after her, bemused, disconcerted, and with his emotions in more kinds of turmoil than he could distinguish between. The majority of it was the result of Kagome's plan to win his freedom – he would need to spend quite a bit of time sorting all that out. But what had happened just a moment ago, when he'd nearly kissed her… that was strange and confusing and disturbing in its own way.

He sighed. It had been a while since he'd tried to deny his attraction to the dark haired girl. And he certainly wouldn't pretend that he wasn't infinitely grateful to her for everything she'd done for him, or that he didn't respect her determination, her brilliance, her openness with her emotions. But all of that, combined with the way everything about her personality seemed to intrigue him and inspire a confusing, unfamiliar warmth inside him…

He couldn't fall in love with her. Inuyasha dug his claws into his palms in an attempt to bring himself back to reality – the reality where he was a slave, with nothing but the clothes he'd worn the day she'd brought him home, and she was the rich, talented daughter of one of the most respected and powerful people in the country. He couldn't fall in love with her. He would inevitably lose her – to her life, her job, her own family. There was no way she could ever love him back, and Inuyasha couldn't bear to lose her the way he'd lost everything else he'd allowed himself to care about.

0o0o0o0o  
I liked this chapter. I think you liked it, too. If not... hopefully the next one!

Another huge thanks to those who reviewed - I love your feedback.


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